


Small Bump

by negiramen



Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: Hate to Love, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Character Death, No mpreg, Raising a baby, Slow Build, lots of fluff, woogyu - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-02
Updated: 2017-08-18
Packaged: 2018-03-26 19:03:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 61,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3861178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/negiramen/pseuds/negiramen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sunggyu never thought about getting his own children. Well, he is a man after all and very much gay. Of course there is stuff like adoption but Sunggyu honestly never liked kids that much. They are loud and noisy. And he doesn’t even have a boyfriend for that matter. Maybe someday, when he’s married, he will think about it with his partner, but for now he has absolutely no intentions on raising a child.</p><p>But then a tragic accident happens and Sunggyu is forced to take care of his 1 month old nephew.</p><p>Life never goes as planned, but maybe it’s just a plan that we don’t know yet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. First Bump

**Author's Note:**

> new negiramen story~ don't steal!
> 
> expect another long, slow-build story XD

“So, are you coming next week or not?”  
  
Sunggyu sighed. He put the phone between his ear and his shoulder. Now his hands were free for browsing through the documents on his desk. “I told you that I’m trying my best to come, noona. I surely don’t want to miss the birth of my nephew, but my boss put this really high stack of papers on my desk that I need to work through. There also is a meeting next week for the new project in Busan. It’s not easy to take off a week right now.”  
  
“Sunggyu! If you don’t show up, I’m scratching you from my family register!” His sister threatened him from the other end of the line.  
  
He smiled shortly. “I don’t think mom and dad would agree with that. I’ll be there, okay? I promise. Now stop being so worked up. Mom will kill me if your water breaks now and you drop the bomb too early.”  
  
Sunggyu could just imagine her pouting as she spoke the next words. “It’s not a bomb and I’m very calm.”  
  
There was a short break. “Sorry, Gyu, it’s just…I’m so overly emotional these days and I want my family to be there when Haneul is born. You guys are all I have. When he left-“  
  
“Oh, don’t you mention that bastard!” He intercepted her speech. Sunggyu’s fingers angrily clenched the paper he was holding. It broke his heart to hear her sniffle on the other end of the line. “Hey, he’s not there but we are, okay? I’ll be there next week, Seungah-noona. You just stay calm and let mom take care of you.”  
  
He heard a soft chuckle. “Thanks, Gyu. You know that I love you, right? Remember to take a break from work every now and then to eat something. I know you have this habit of skipping meals!”  
  
“Yes, yes, I will. You are already acting like a true mom. I love you too.”  
  
“See you next week, little brother.” She said before hanging up.  
  
Sunggyu threw his phone on the desk and ruffled his hair as he checked the time. It was already past lunch time and he hadn’t even eaten breakfast. It wasn’t like he forgot to eat it. His boss had just come in and tossed the papers on his table before he could even think of unpacking one of the sandwiches he had packed in the morning. He glanced at the door to his office and deemed the situation safe enough to take a bite or two.  
  
As he munched on the sandwich, Sunggyu browsed through his Facebook page and smiled because it was full of his sister’s posts. She kept the whole world up to date with the development of her baby. He clicked on her profile and browsed through her baby album. There were a lot of pictures from when she had her first ultrasound up until today. His sister had come a long way since the day she found out. Now she could confidently take pictures of her round baby bump with a smile on her face, but Sunggyu could still remember how hard it had been for her at the start.

  
  
**8 months ago**

 

Sunggyu was torn from his sleep by the loud ringing of his doorbell. “What the-“  
  
He groaned and grabbed the pillow to press it over his ear. Maybe the person at his doorstep would give up if he didn’t get up or maybe they had gotten the wrong door anyways. Sunggyu knew no person who would ring a doorbell at 3 am in the morning. The ringing didn’t stop, though. He growled in annoyance and sat up. “Whoever you are, you are so dead!”  
  
He stumbled out of the dark bedroom and shuffled through the short corridor towards his front door. “I’m coming, geez! Stop raping my doorbell already!”  
  
Sunggyu ripped the door open without checking or turning the lights on. “Do you kno- S-Seungah?”  
  
His sister looked back at him with teary eyes. Sobs made her body tremble. She fell into his arms without saying anything and Sunggyu hesitantly hugged her back. “What’s wrong? What are you doing here? Did you drive all the way to Seoul in this state? God, noona, stop crying please. You’re scaring me.”  
  
Seungah didn’t stop and he let out a sigh in defeat. “Let’s at least go inside, okay?”  
  
He pulled her into the apartment and then closed the door. Sunggyu turned on the lights and led his crying sister over to the little couch in the living room. He forced her to sit down. “You’re acting like someone died. Are mom and dad, okay?”  
  
She wiped her eyes with her sleeve – which was a fruitless act, from his point of view, since more tears kept spilling – and nodded. “T-They are fine. I-I just needed….I wanted to talk…to someone. I’m scared they will… abandon me when they find out.”  
  
Sunggyu frowned and crouched down in front of her. He took her hands in his and rubbed his thumb over the skin soothingly. “You’re still confusing me, noona. What’s wrong?”  
  
Seungah didn’t answer and kept crying. Sunggyu sighed again and stood up shortly to get her a box of tissues. “Did something happen with your boyfriend?”  
  
Her sobs got louder for a moment and he guessed that he was right. Anger filled his chest as he sat down next to her. He had never met the guy since Seungah was still living in their hometown, which meant there was a three hour drive between them and that made it hard to meet up. Nevertheless, he had always disliked that guy his sister often spoke about on the phone. There was no real reason for his dislike. Something about the guy dating Seungah had just ticked him off from the start. His parents often teased him that he was being too overprotective of his older sister.  
  
Sunggyu put an arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer. She leaned into the touch. “Hey, no matter what that ass did, mom and dad won’t abandon you. You will find a better guy, don’t worry.”  
  
Seungah sobbed against his shoulder. Okay, he was seriously bad at the whole comforting thing. What was he supposed to say without knowing the whole situation anyways?  
  
“I won’t….! No one else will want me now.” She replied in between her weeping.  
  
“Did he rape you?!” Sunggyu asked in shock and was utterly relieved when she shook her head. She even smiled shortly.  
  
“No, I gave my consent. Like always.”  
  
“Did he pull some weird BDSM Fifty Shades shit on you? Because if he did, I’m going to push the tape and wire down his throat-“  
  
“Sunggyu!” She interrupted him with a light glare. Seungah sniffled and wiped her face again. “He did none of that. He’s not…he’s not a bad person.”  
  
He huffed. “If he makes you drive 3 hours to my apartment to wake me up in the middle of the night with your crying, then that makes him a bad person in my eyes.”  
  
“He didn’t make me do that. He…we broke three weeks ago.”  
  
Sunggyu frowned. “I think I’m going to spend the rest of my life confused. I really want to help you, but if you don’t tell me-“  
  
“I’m pregnant.”  
  
His eyes widened and for a moment his mouth stood simply open. At least until he found his speech back. “You’re…what?”  
  
“Pregnant. With a child. Yay…” She smiled, although it was a pained one.  
  
Sunggyu tried sorting his thoughts but failed to do so. “It- _his_ child? He’s the father, right? You didn’t cheat on him, did you?”  
  
Seungah shot him another glare and smacked his head. “ _Ouch!_ ”  
  
“No, I didn’t! Idiot…” His sister broke out into tears again and he cursed inwardly. “He doesn’t want it. He doesn’t want me. I don’t know what to do!”  
  
She bowed over and buried her face in her hands. Sunggyu massaged her back soothingly and tried to ask her more questions, but Seungah didn’t react to anything he said. After a while, he just gave up and got her more tissues instead. When he returned to the couch, his sister was stretched out on it and sleeping deeply. He sighed and rubbed his temples.  
  
“What a mess did you get yourself into, noona?” Sunggyu asked his unconscious sister. He went to the bedroom to get a blanket and a pillow for her.  
  
He put the pillow beneath her head and threw the blanket over her fragile looking form. Sunggyu wiped her wet cheeks. Was she really pregnant? Had that bastard left her because of it? Their parents would definitely flip. His mother was a very conservative woman and getting pregnant before marriage wasn’t exactly something she supported. When it came to her, you’d better still be a virgin by the time you married. Now his sister even seemed to be alone, abandoned by the father of her child. Could she still abort it? Would she want to do it?  
  
Sunggyu groaned. It was really too early to think about stuff like that. It was almost 4 am and he needed to work in a few hours, but somehow he doubted that he’d go anywhere today. His sister needed him. “I better leave our parents a message. She probably didn’t say anything at all.”  
  
He called his parents’ number and of course no one answered, but his goal was the mailbox anyways. “Hey mom, dad, I don’t want you to get scared when you wake up and notice noona isn’t there. She’s at my apartment right now. I had a little accident here with the washing machine and I called the only expert I know, _ha ha_. I nominate her for best sister of the year award. Sorry for the kidnapping. Bye!”  
  
Sunggyu tossed the phone away and sighed. That was probably not the most believable lie, but at least his parents would now think that he had fucked up and not his sister. He was the troublesome kid that had left home for the big city of Seoul. His older sister was the family’s jewel.  
  
“Better catch a few more hours of sleep while I can. Maybe this will make more sense afterwards.”  
  
  
  
Next time he woke up, it was 6 am and his alarm clock was shouting at him to get out of bed. Sunggyu cursed quietly because he had forgotten to turn it off, but it didn’t matter in the end. His sleep had been a restless one anyways. He had kept hearing a baby scream in his dream and that had been enough to keep him from having a peaceful sleep. He climbed out of bed and shuffled towards the living room. His sister was still sleeping on the couch, seemingly having a better dream than he had had.  
  
Sunggyu continued on to the kitchen to make some coffee. He really needed one if he wanted to make it through the day. He still couldn’t believe that his sister was here, on his couch, possibly pregnant. Not to mention that bastard of a father seemed to have dumped her for that. “I hope a car runs you over, jerk!”  
  
By the time his sister stirred awake, he had finished his third cup of coffee, called his boss to lie about catching a bad cold and prepared some basic breakfast with toast and tea for Seungah. Sunggyu carefully approached her. “Are you feeling a bit better?”  
  
She blinked shortly and then sat up before giving him a nod. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have come here in the middle of the night. You have to work, right?”  
  
“I told my boss I’m not coming today. Mom and dad also think I’ve done something stupid and that you’re here because of that. So don’t worry and eat something for now. I’ve prepared a grand feast for you with toast and tea.” He pointed at the little table standing in the corner.  
  
Seungah sniffled and wiped her eyes again. “How do I deserve a younger brother like you? You didn’t have to do all of that.”  
  
Sunggyu smiled shortly. “Of course I have to take care of my older sister. I have a lot to pay you back for.”  
  
For a second, she smiled as well. “Isn’t it the other way around? I know you’re the more reliable one out of the two of us. I know you are, so I…came here to talk with you.”  
  
“Let’s eat first. I don’t want you to faint or something. You look worse than me and that actually means a lot.”  
  
The siblings moved over to the table and Sunggyu was relieved to see his sister eating. He had been afraid that she would reject the food. There were a lot of questions that he wanted to ask, but Sunggyu swallowed them. It was not the right time to ask her. There would still be enough time after breakfast.  
  
When they were finished eating, Seungah offered to do the dishes. Sunggyu watched her with a light smile. “What about your job, noona?”  
  
“Same as you. Told them I’m sick. It’s not really a lie anyways.”  
  
“So do you feel like explaining everything to me properly now?” He asked carefully when she was done.  
  
His sister turned around again and nodded. Sunggyu stood up and pointed at the couch. “Start from the beginning this time. Like, for example, why you broke up.”  
  
They sat down on the small couch and she folded her hands in her lap. “We broke up three weeks ago. He got an offer to work at his dream company in America. He didn’t want us to have a long distance relationship because he…he wasn’t confident that our relationship was strong enough, at least from his side.”  
  
Sunggyu sighed. “So he wasn’t serious about you?”  
  
She smiled sadly. “To be honest, I wasn’t that serious about our relationship either. We liked each other and had a lot of common interests, but it never became more, I think. We just got along really good and, well, the sex was good. Very good.”  
  
“Thanks for the enlightenment about your sex life.” He replied dryly. “So you were not really sad he left, but then you found out about…that thing?”  
  
“Don’t call it a thing, Gyu.” Seungah pursed her lips. “I know that job was really important to him, so I didn’t hold him back at first. But then I noticed something was off… My period still hadn’t come and I felt queasy. So I went to the doctor last week. She checked me and then I got the news… _ha ha_ …I’m pregnant.”  
  
She paused speaking and Sunggyu waited patiently for her to continue. He didn’t want to push her by asking further questions. His sister would continue when she found the right words and the courage to do so. “I panicked at first, of course. I didn’t know what to do and my first idea was to call him about the news. I thought maybe he would…know what to do. Maybe he’d want to keep it and stay here to raise the child together. I didn’t want to abort it…even if it was an accident. It’s alive, Gyu. I can’t kill it…”  
  
Sunggyu wrapped an arm around her shoulders again. “Let me guess, he wanted you to abort it?”  
  
Seungah shook her head softly. “No. I mean, I’m not sure. He didn’t answer my call. I left him messages on his mailbox but he never called me back. I tried it again yesterday because I wanted to talk to him, but guess what? It said his number is not available.”  
  
„Did he block your number?“  
  
„I don’t know. I can’t reach it anymore. I kept trying yesterday but...“ Her voice broke and new tears rolled down her cheeks.  
  
Sunggyu clenched his fist. As if it wasn’t enough that the bastard ignored her like a dirty coward, now it looked like he had even blocked her number. Did he have no shame or honor? Could he not face the mistake he, they, had made? It wasn’t Seungah’s child alone. Where was he when she needed his support? Did he think of himself as too good for her, now that he had the job in America? Her situation reminded him once again why he didn’t want to be sex friends with someone. He wanted a serious relationship – even if something like pregnancy was something that would never happen to him. Thank god.  
  
Her shoulders trembled as new sobs wrecked her body. Sunggyu tightened his hold on her. “Ssh, that bastard doesn’t deserve any of your tears.”  
  
“I-I just don’t know what to do now. I don’t know how to raise a child! How am I supposed to do it alone?”  
  
He knew that the easiest way was to abort the child. Sunggyu really had no idea about raising children but society seemed to think you needed two for that. “I know you don’t want to think about it, but maybe it would be better to...abort it?”  
  
She shook her head firmly and grabbed a tissue to wipe her eyes. “No! I made a mistake but it would be wrong to punish the child for it. Mom and dad won’t agree, I know, but I want to try. I want my child to have a chance. Or do you think I’m wrong?”  
  
Sunggyu rubbed his nape. “God, I don’t know, Seungah. I can’t comprehend what it feels like to have life growing inside of me. But if you decide to keep it, I’ll stand by you, okay? And I’m sure mom and dad will get over their shadows and support you too, whatever you decide. They love you. Heck, I know mom would love to have grandchildren. It will probably be hard to raise it, but you won’t be alone.”  
  
His sister smiled shortly and turned to him. She wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in his shoulder. “Thank you, little brother.”  
  
He patted her back. “I didn’t really do anything.”  
  
“No, you helped me a lot. You welcomed me here in the middle of the night and you gave me the words I needed. I felt so alone yesterday but now I feel better. I needed someone to take my side and you’re here.”  
  
Sunggyu pushed her away slowly to look into her eyes. “Did you think I’d ignore you like your dumb ex-boyfriend? We’re family.”  
  
She put a hand over his and smiled. “You’re right. Thank you, Gyu. I’m glad I came here.”  
  
“Didn’t think I’d be an uncle so early.” Sunggyu tried to brighten up the atmosphere.  
  
His sister chuckled. “You’ll be the best uncle, buying my baby all the expensive presents with your chic Seoul money.”  
  
He raised an eyebrow. “I can see why you wanted my support now.”  
  
She laughed wholeheartedly and Sunggyu joined in after a second. He wouldn’t mind spending some of his money for a cute nephew or niece. He made enough of it anyways. His sister would need all the help she could get and he would not deny her that. She didn’t deserve to suffer just because some guy couldn’t take responsibility. Even if their parents didn’t support her, Sunggyu would stand by her side.  
  
They were interrupted by the ringing of his phone. Sunggyu raised a brow and stood up to check the caller ID. He groaned. “Our parents. I’ll just not answer it and act like we’re not here.”  
  
Seungah stood up as well and walked past him, picking up the phone before he could stop her. “Hello, mother.”  
  
There was a short pause and Sunggyu guessed their mother was spamming her with rants about what kind of useless kid he was. He was still a kid in her eyes, even with 23 years. His sister exclaimed a sigh. “Mom, please. _Mom_! Let me talk for a second and stop talking like that about him. It’s not Sunggyu’s fault. I selfishly showed up at his place at 3 am and he took me in, so don’t blame him.”  
  
He looked at her and asked with a lowered voice: “What are you doing? She’s going to ask why you’re here.”  
  
She only raised a hand to sign him to be quiet. Sunggyu puffed his cheeks shortly. “Yes. Yes again. Sunggyu is innocent. If anything, he’s the best brother I could’ve ever asked for.”  
  
His sister gave him a short smile and he sent one back. She was quiet again for a moment and Sunggyu could hear their mother’s muffled voice talking. Then suddenly Seungah spoke again. “I’m pregnant.”  
  
Sunggyu stared at her, his mouth agape. “What are you doing?!”  
  
Seungah seemed just as shocked. “It just slipped out, okay?!”  
  
“Things like that don’t just slip out! I thought we were going to calmly sit down with them and discuss it! You don’t casually drop ‘I’m pregnant’ in a conversation!”  
  
She made a face and then glanced at the phone in her hands. “Mom? Are you still there?”  
  
The other end of the line was awfully quiet. Sunggyu took the phone from her. “It’s not as bad as it sounds, mom.”  
  
There was no reply. “Did she faint from the shock?”  
  
Seungah gasped. “Oh my god. What did I do? Do we have to call an ambulance now?”  
  
“Don’t you dare panic now!”  
  
“Is she dead?!”  
  
“I doubt it. She’s a robot. They don’t die that easily.” Sunggyu said matter-of-factly.  
  
“Kim Sunggyu, I heard that!” Both of them gasped at their mother’s voice.  
  
He turned it on speaker. Seungah leaned closer. “Mom, are you okay? You didn’t reply anymore…”  
  
“Sorry, dear, your father suddenly shouted from the living room, so I dropped the phone and ran over to him. He let my favorite vase fall down! Can you believe that? The porcelain blue-white vase I got from your great grandmother, shattered to pieces!”  
  
Sunggyu put his face in his hands with a groan and his sister rolled her eyes. “So you didn’t hear what I said to you before you left?”  
  
“Oh I’m sorry, Seungah, I didn’t. What did you say?”  
  
The siblings looked at each other and she gave Sunggyu a short shrug. “I thought we should have a family dinner again soon. Just with us four. It’s been a while since we sat together and talked.”  
  
“That’s a wonderful idea, sweetheart. If only your brother can make some time in his oh so full schedule! He can’t even give his mother a call every now and then!”  
  
He huffed. “You call me often enough.”  
  
“I’ll find the right weekend for all of us, so don’t worry, mom. I will talk to you when I’m back home. See you later.” She only gave their mother time for a short ‘Drive safely’ before she hung up.  
  
“I don’t think she likes being cut off like that.” Sunggyu mused.  
  
“I was afraid she’d ask why I’m here again once she’s over the shock of losing her favorite vase.”  
  
“Very likely. So what are we doing now?”  
  
“Well…” Seungah left him alone to grab her bag that had been discarded near the front door by Sunggyu. She came back with it. “I thought we could watch DVDs together, like old times. I even brought popcorn.”  
  
He raised a brow. “You do know we are not teenagers anymore. Please tell me you didn’t bring _that_ DVD.”  
  
She grinned and pulled a few DVDs out of her bag. “Oh, come on! You love _Dirty Dancing_!”  
  
“No, I don’t!” Sunggyu exclaimed.  
  
“You totally had a thing for Patrick Swayze.”  
  
“Well, he does have a nice ass.”  
  
“I got you!” Seungah giggled happily.  
  
He rolled his eyes and shuffled back to the couch, letting his body plop down on it. “Just put it in already. I’m only doing this for the sake of old times.”  
  
“Yeah, right, Gyu. Riii~ight.”

 

**Present day**

  
He walked into his boss’ office without knocking and let the papers fall onto his desk. The older man looked at him with furrowed brows. “What is this?”  
  
“I’ve finished the task you gave me this morning. I’ve sorted the files and these are all the ones where I found something wrong with the numbers. I have also sent you a mail with my proposal for the Busan project next week. There is a sketch of the building I have in mind and also a full estimate of the costs, plus the pro and cons of choosing my idea.” Sunggyu declared confidently.  
  
His boss looked surprised for a second, but then he smiled widely. “I knew I could depend on you, Sunggyu. Why are you in such a hurry, though? We still got some time until the meeting.”  
  
“I told you I need to the next week off work.”  
  
The older man sighed. “Sunggyu, you know you are my best architect and I treasure your excellent work a lot, but there is an important meeting next week. Investors will be there to decide if they will support our idea or not. I need you there.”  
  
“Sir, please, my sister is giving birth to my nephew next week and she really needs me by her side. She has no one else. I’m confident my proposal can win them over. Just let someone else present it, maybe Myungsoo. I know he can do it.”  
  
“Myungsoo? He’s still an intern, though.”  
  
He smiled. “A very talented and intelligent intern, who has been with us for half a year already. I know he can pull this off better than anyone else. I’ll take responsibility if it doesn’t work out.”  
  
“Fine!” His boss exclaimed, seemingly a little irritated because he lost the argument. “I will grant you your holiday and Myungsoo can do the presentation, but you’d better not ask for another holiday for the next 6 months. And if we lose the investors, I’m cutting your pay.”  
  
He bowed deeply. “Thank you, sir.”  
  
“Now go before I remember what I just agreed to.”  
  
Sunggyu smiled as he walked out of his boss’ office. His sister would be happy to hear the positive news. Next week, his little nephew would be born and he’d have the most loving family he could get. He would not miss the guy who should’ve been his father.


	2. Second Bump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunggyu heads to his hometown to visit his sister for his nephew's birth :)

Normally, Sunggyu hated driving long distances with his car, but today he couldn’t find it in him to care. He had the window rolled down and the music loud as he raced down the road. Left and right were only trees and fields to be seen. There weren’t even a lot of cars on the road, probably because Sunggyu had woken up extra early to avoid any kind of traffic jam. He only shared the streets with a few people that probably had the same idea as him or just needed to get to work this early. But Sunggyu doubted a lot of people commuted from Seoul to a smaller city. It was more likely the other way around. He certainly didn’t mind the empty streets. He could drive whatever speed he wanted and even sing along his favorite songs without feeling embarrassed about it. Sunggyu was in a good mood and he would let nothing ruin it today.  
  
When was the last time he’d had a holiday? His boss always made him work a lot, but when it came to having a day off, he would be terribly stingy. Sunggyu was lucky that his boss was weak when it came to things like babies. Something that he could not entirely comprehend, but then again, wasn’t he also in such a good mood because of his sister and her soon-to-be-born child? Sunggyu genuinely looked forward to seeing his nephew. It was weird how an unborn life could already mean so much to him. He wasn’t even carrying the baby or was close to his sister constantly, but somehow he fell for his nephew nevertheless. Maybe it was true that simply _knowing_ someone close to you was pregnant could activate some unconscious part in your brain and put you into the mood too. He wanted the kid to have a nice childhood. One, in which it would never miss his father’s presence. His family would make sure that little Haneul became an upright person, unlike his cowardly father.  
  
Time flew by as he kept thinking about little Hanuel, who was soon going to enter their world. Sunggyu was in the middle of doing his second break from the long drive when his phone rang. He didn’t hear it at first because he was busy refueling the tank, but then he noticed the blinking screen inside the car and opened the car door. He reached out and grabbed the phone.  
  
“Mom?”  
  
“Where are you, boy? You should’ve been here long ago!”  
  
Sunggyu huffed. “I’m not a robot. I don’t drive 3 hours without a break or two. Don’t worry. I’m not dead.”  
  
“Idiot! It’s not always about you! Your sister is going into labor and you’re not here, you stupid child!”  
  
_She never stops insulting me. Such a nice mother._ “Already? But didn’t the doctor say it was scheduled for Friday? That’s still 5 days to go.”  
  
“And you think the baby cares about that?” His mother asked dryly.  
  
Sunggyu rolled his eyes. He remembered checking his tank and pulled out when enough fuel was inside of it. “Mom, I’ll be as fast as I can. I’m sure you want me to arrive in the hospital with my own car and not with an ambulance. Just message me the address and I’ll hurry over. Tell noona to keep it in a little longer, okay?”  
  
“She can’t control that-“ He quickly hung up. Sunggyu didn’t have the time to listen to her.  
  
He locked his car properly and went to pay for the fuel. It was still half an hour drive until he reached their hometown. Twenty minutes if he hurried and broke a few traffic laws. Maybe he seemed relatively calm and composed on the outside, but Sunggyu _was_ panicking inside. He had groaned and cursed for having to drive to his hometown just for the birth of his nephew just weeks ago, but now he had caught the fever from everyone else and was just as excited. He wanted to be there when it happened! Besides, babies were always cuter when they weren’t your own. Sunggyu didn’t want a crying, screaming baby to raise. He preferred them sleeping and quiet, the cute form.  
  
Sunggyu drove as fast as he could without getting into an accident. He didn’t have to use his car a lot in Seoul, so he wasn’t exactly the safest and most experienced driver. There was no use in risking an accident now. Seungah would have his head if he died on his way to the hospital. (Well, she could probably have his head in that case, because he wouldn’t need it anymore after passing on.) He noticed the little LED light of his phone blinking throughout the drive but Sunggyu didn’t check the messages. He was not confident in doing texting and driving. They were probably just status updates from his mother plus messages telling him to hurry up.  
  
  
  
In the end, it took him 46 minutes to reach the hospital because of some traffic jam right when he left the highway. Sunggyu parked the car with a long sigh and grabbed everything he needed, before getting out of the car. He jogged over to the entrance of the hospital and walked over to the reception with wide steps.  
  
“Hello. I’m looking for my sister, Kim Seungah.”  
  
The nurse looked at him for a moment and then back to her screen, typing something on her keyboard. “She’s in the maternity ward. Room 27. Don’t worry, the baby hasn’t arrived yet.”  
  
He was relieved to hear that. She had probably noticed his disheveled and slightly panicky state. “Thank you. Have a nice day!”  
  
Sunggyu rushed towards the maternity ward. Signs showed him the way he had to follow. Some of the staff gave him disapproving looks for running in the corridors and he settled for quick walking instead. He reached the ward in a few minutes and soon enough, Sunggyu stopped in front of room 27. He knocked shortly.  
  
“It’s me.”  
  
“Come in.” His father called from the other side.  
  
He opened the door slowly and entered the room. His parents were sitting at a table, apparently in the middle of having a late breakfast (or early lunch). His mother gave him a quick glance. “You’re late.”  
  
“But not too late.” He countered playfully and walked over to his sister.  
  
She stretched out her arms and he hugged her shortly. “Hey, noona. Thank you for waiting for me.”  
  
Sunggyu pulled back again and they exchanged a smile. “It wasn’t exactly my decision, but maybe little Haneul wanted his uncle to be here.”  
  
He glanced down at his sister’s swollen abdomen. “Doesn’t look very little to me, sis. Why isn’t he not here yet, though? Serious question.”  
  
Seungah shrugged. “My water broke, so we thought I was about to go into labor and headed to the hospital, but the contractions haven’t started yet.”  
  
There was no free chair, so he just sat down on the edge of the bed. “So…is that normal?”  
  
His mother snorted. “Of course not! If the contractions don’t start soon, the doctor might need to induce labor!”  
  
He narrowed his eyes at her. How was he supposed to know that? He was a man! Which man knew anything at all about pregnancies? Seungah patted his hand. “The doctor also said it happens to some women. It’s not entirely uncommon and a few days earlier won’t make much of a difference. Besides, we have to give the baby its 24 hours. I’m sure Haneul will come by himself.”  
  
Sunggyu crouched down and looked at the baby bump. “Look at you scaring everyone, Haneul. Already a little troublemaker. Just like your uncle.”  
  
“Or his father.” His mother commented and the mood in the room went ice-cold. She cleared her throat and stood up. “I’ll take a short walk.”  
  
Their mother left the room, quickly followed by their father who gave Seungah an apologetic look. Sunggyu glanced back to his sister. He was surprised that their mother even brought him up again. Their parents had been very supporting of Seungah’s baby wish these past months and had never mentioned that bastard again. “What was that?”  
  
She smiled sadly. “You know how she is. Mom still thinks that I should give Haneul free for adoption after birth. Sometimes that side of her slips through. She’s scared no one will ever marry me if I have a child.”  
  
Sunggyu rolled his eyes. “You’ll find someone. Mom is sometimes forgetting that we are living in the 21rst century now. Raising a child alone is not that uncommon anymore, which is actually kind of sad, now that I think about it.”  
  
“That’s true I guess.” She turned away shortly to grab something from the little table next to her bed. “Here. Your key to my apartment. I thought you might prefer that over sleeping at our parents’ house.”  
  
He took the key from her. Sunggyu really wasn’t eager to sleep in the same house as their parents. Not that he didn’t like them, but his mom had the tendency to nag about every little thing. She was still bitter that he moved out of their hometown. “Thanks, noona. I can already set up little Haneul’s next present then.”  
  
Her eyes widened. “You bought something again? Oh, Sunggyu. I really can’t take so much from you. You’ve already paid for the whole renovation of the guest room into a nursery and you also bought the crib. Not to mention the savings account-“  
  
He grabbed her hand and pressed it softly. Tears shimmered in her eyes and Sunggyu tried to stop her from crying. He gave her a smile. “I do this because I want to, okay? Times are hard for you right now and I want to help you. It’s not like I have anything else to spend money on.”  
  
“I don’t know what I’d do without you.”  
  
“I admit I’m the best brother in the entire world. No one matches my awesomeness.” He replied with fake vanity.  
  
She smiled. “You’re probably right about that.”  
  
“Ah, noona, stop feeding my ego. It’s almost shooting through the roof.”  
  
The siblings laughed together, at least until Seungah suddenly grimaced. “Oh god-“  
  
Sunggyu’s eyes widened. “W-What…what is wrong?”  
  
“Nothing’s wrong…ugh…everything is just perfect now. I’m actually making this face because I enjoy pain! _AH_! FUCK! GOD!”  
  
He stared at his cursing sister in shock, then he had the great idea to actually press the little red button to call for a nurse. Was this normal? Or was something wrong? How was he supposed to know that? “D-Don’t worry. Someone will be there any second!”  
  
True to his word, two nurses burst into the room. “She’s in… _uh_ …pain.”  
  
Seungah let out another strangled scream that sounded rather scary to him. The nurses didn’t panic at all, though. “The contractions have started. That’s good. It’s a sign that the baby is coming.”  
  
“I’ll go get the doctor.” Said the other nurse and rushed out of the room again.  
  
Sunggyu just stood at the side without a clue what was going on and watched the pained expression on his sister’s face. That was normal? People were actually in that much pain before giving birth? The baby wasn’t even coming out yet – or was it? _I’m grateful for being a man. I didn’t know mom went through this too. No wonder she’s so grumpy._  
  
Talking about the devil, his mother entered the room with a red face and wide eyes. “Baby! Is it finally coming?”  
  
Seungah gritted her teeth. “I think so? It feels like someone is ripping apart my insides down there.”  
  
Their mother smiled proudly. “I told you giving birth is not an easy process. You’ll experience much more pain soon. Your body is only preparing right now.”  
  
_How encouraging._ Why did no one give women medals for this? His sister started a new wave of curses, though the other women in the room only smiled understandingly at that. Sunggyu felt like really wrong being in this room. The door was opened again and a male doctor entered.  
  
“Ms. Kim. Seems like we won’t need to induce the birth after all.” He smiled at the other family members before examining her carefully. Seungah groaned again. “What is the gap between the contractions?”  
  
“I don’t know!” His sister shouted in anger.  
  
The nurse cleared her throat and told the doctor what she had noticed. “Then it might still take a while, but at least we are a step closer.”  
  
When the doctor raised the blanket and asked her to spread her legs, it was Sunggyu’s call to make an escape. “I… _uh_ …I’m getting a coffee. Yeah, I need one. Now.”  
  
He exited the room quickly and heaved a sigh. He loved his sister but there were some things he did not want to see. And he really could use a coffee, so Sunggyu headed out to find the cafeteria of the hospital. From what he understood it would still take a while until the baby came. Getting a coffee didn’t take very long anyways and he was sure that his mother would call him if anything happened.  
  
It took him about seven minutes to find the cafeteria and another ten until he actually had his coffee. Sunggyu took a sip and the bitter taste made him frown for a second. Why did coffee have to taste so bad? But at least it woke you up when you were dead tired and Sunggyu really was exhausted from waking up so early. He drank a bit of his coffee before heading back to his sister’s room. He found his father sitting on a bench in the corridor and Sunggyu decided to sit down next to him.  
  
“You look like you could use a coffee too.”  
  
His father shrugged. “You shouldn’t disappear like that. Your mother is pretty upset.”  
  
“Isn’t she always mad at me? There hasn’t been a day she wasn’t angry with me since I moved to Seoul.” He sipped his warm coffee.  
  
“You know she loves you a lot. That’s why she was hurt when you decided to move so far away.”  
  
“What did she expect me to do with my grades? I was the best student at my high school. Did she expect me to just start working after school or enter the measly college of our town? I wanted to make something out of my life, so I went to a proper college and found myself a well-paid job that nurtures my talents the most. I didn’t want to-“ He cut himself off. Sunggyu knew he was going too far with his words. He was just so mad that everyone blamed him for wanting to make something out of his life.  
  
“You didn’t want to end up like us? Living in a small, rural village with a low-paid job instead of being some famous architect?”  
  
Sunggyu gritted his teeth. “Fine. I’m the egoist here. Hate me.”  
  
They sat in silence for a while – well, not complete silence, since they could hear his sister’s muffled curses and groans. Sunggyu busied himself with his coffee until it was empty and then he took his time slowly walking to the trash can to throw it away. How long did those contractions last anyways? Maybe he should play a game on his phone.  
  
His father sighed next to him. “Sunggyu, we don’t hate you. We were always proud of you for doing so well in school, but it’s hard for parents to let go of their children. Someday you might understand that, when you have your own children. You want to keep them close to make sure they are safe.”  
  
Sunggyu snorted. “You know I won’t ever have kids. I’m gay, dad.”  
  
“There’s adoption, my boy, and who knows what the future might bring. Maybe you’ll meet a nice woman and fall for her.”  
  
_And then I notice it was all just a phase._ Sunggyu didn’t say it out loud, though. He knew his parents were disappointed with his choices, a lot of them, but he doubted his sexual orientation would suddenly change. It wasn’t like he found women unattractive, but the thought of being more than friends with them was somewhat strange. But who knew if he would someday adopt a kid with his partner.  
  
“Your mother misses you a lot.”  
  
“Well, she doesn’t show it much. She’s been nothing but screaming at me for today.”  
  
His father smiled shortly. “She’s very tense because of Seungah’s pregnancy. Your mother is still worried something could go wrong. Even when she call you and told you to hurry, she was only worried that you might have gotten into an accident and wanted to check on you.”  
  
“I know…”  
  
The awkward couple fell into another silence. Father and son had never really been ones to talk a lot. Maybe because his father was an easy man who didn’t need much and Sunggyu was someone who wouldn’t settle for easy. He leaned his head and closed his eyes, trying to block out his sister whenever a contraction made her voice out her pain. It couldn’t hurt to catch up some sleep.  
  
  
  
He awoke with a start when the door to his sister’s room suddenly opened with enough force to make it slam into the wall. The two men immediately stood up. His mother came rushing out. “The baby is coming! It’s coming!”  
  
Now she was obviously the one panicking. His father stayed calm. “I’ll go get the doctor.”  
  
Sunggyu glanced at his mother and awkwardly put an arm around her shoulders. She glanced up at him. “What if something goes wrong? Her water broke so early…the baby could have caught an infection.”  
  
“She and the baby will be alright. Let the doctor and the nurses do their job. They have done this many times more than you.” He tried to calm his mother.  
  
Just then the doctor arrived with two nurses and they entered the room quickly. Sunggyu and his family watched from the sidelines as they prepared everything. He cringed at the sight of someone’s head between his sister’s legs, but then reminded himself that this not what it looked like. Seungah glanced over to them. Her face was covered in sweat and getting redder with every angry huff she released. She reached out a hand and Sunggyu pointed at his mother, but Seungah shook her head weakly.  
  
She waved at him. “Come here, you idiot.”  
  
Following the command, Sunggyu let go of his mother and walked over to sit at her side. She grabbed his hand and he gasped in pain because, _damn,_ he didn’t know she had so much strength. “ _Ow_! You’re crushing my hand!”  
  
She glared at him with a red face. “Shut up! We can switch if you want!”  
  
“ _Uh_ …no.”  
  
The doctor cleared his throat. “Ms. Kim, please concentrate on your breathing like the nurse practiced with you before. Don’t force yourself to push. You will feel when the right moment arrives.”  
  
“Right now I only feel pain!” She shouted and gave his hand another squeeze. Sunggyu grimaced. It felt like his hand would fall of soon.  
  
His sister kept groaning and huffing in between her breathing practices. After a few minutes, she seemed ready. “Okay…”  
  
Sunggyu watched her face twist in pain and concentration as she pushed and the nurses kept reminding her to breathe. She took another deep breath and pushed again. He watched the whole process with a mixture of sympathy and fascination. It seemed to take an eternity until the doctor declared he could see the head. Sunggyu repressed the urge to stand up and take a look. His sister held his hand with an iron grip anyways and he wasn’t sure if the sight of a baby head looking out of her- He shook his head inwardly. He really shouldn’t look.  
  
“You can do it, noona. Don’t give up yet.” Sunggyu encouraged her.  
  
She huffed and pushed again with another groan. “ _Gaaah_!”  
  
“You’re doing good, Ms. Kim. Don’t rush. The shoulders are already out. I can see the umbilical cord.”  
  
His sister released a scream as she kept pushing and after another strong push, the doctor spoke up. “It’s out. Clamp the cord and cut it, Nurse Lee.”  
  
She did as told and the other nurse got a towel ready. His mother watched wearily. “He’s not crying-“  
  
That seemed to be all the encouragement (or nagging) little Hanuel needed and he let out his first sound. A towel was wrapped around him to keep the baby warm while the doctor took care of whatever between his sister’s legs. The nurse stepped closer with the crying baby in her arms. “A healthy baby boy.”  
  
Seungah held out her arms and the baby was given to her. She held it to her chest and kissed the little one’s head. Only now Sunggyu noticed he had a little blue beanie on. Probably to keep him warm. The whole experience had been kind of weird for him but everything seemed to be worth it, because his sister had the most beautiful smile on her face. She stroked the crying baby’s cheek with her fingers, carefully, as if Haneul were made out of glass.  
  
“My little angel. Haneul-ah. So beautiful.” Sunggyu noticed she was crying now, but it was probably normal to be overwhelmed after such an intense process.  
  
The doctor finished up his work and stood up. “Congratulations, Ms. Kim. We’ll give you a moment alone. We are going to have another examination later and the next days, just to make sure you are fine. Your baby will also need to be tested properly, since it might have infections. Something like that can be deadly for a newborn.”  
  
Seungah’s face darkened shortly. Who would like to hear that their kid might still die, just after entering their world? “Thank you, doctor.”  
  
He nodded and the three of them left the room. His mother stepped closer to look at the baby. “My, such a beautiful boy.”  
  
Sunggyu raised a brow because he honestly thought the newborn baby looked kind of ugly. It was all wrinkly and red but who asked for his opinion anyways. He had to admit the baby still had something that just made you internally “ _oooh_ ” and “ _aawww_ ” in awe. It was so small and vulnerable. No one asked if they could hold it for a moment – his mother seemed like she really wanted to – and they just gave Seungah time to get acquainted with her son. As he watched her, Sunggyu slowly understood why she had wanted to keep it. To think that little Haneul would’ve never been allowed to live, had she aborted the baby back then. It was a scary thought, but also a useless one. She hadn’t aborted the baby and now she held the biggest treasure in her arms.  
  
A treasure that wouldn’t calm down. Sunggyu looked at his mother. “Were we this loud as well?”  
  
She chuckled shortly. “Your sister was a quiet one, but you kept the whole hospital entertained.”  
  
Her eyes started to glisten suddenly and she leaned over to kiss Seungah’s head. She stroked her cheek next. “My little girl…I can’t believe you are a mother yourself now.”  
  
“I can’t believe it either…he’s so amazing, mom. I’d never be able to give him away.”  
  
“Of course you won’t. I’m sorry for proposing that in the first place. We’ll support you all the way.” His mother was clearly smitten by the little baby.  
  
Sunggyu and his father watched from the sidelines as the two started to break out into a crying contest. The both of them weren’t quite at that emotional level yet, though he did feel moved by the scene. It meant a lot for Seungah that their parents were standing on her side. Sunggyu knew that she needed them. He could maybe send her money or gifts, but he couldn’t help her with raising the baby. He was living three hours away from here after all. Not to mention that he had no clue how to care for a baby. His mother would be a much bigger help.  
  
  
  
Eventually, their bonding time was interrupted by one of the nurses returning. She took the baby away from its mother again to get Haneul washed up and checked out. He would be supervised for the night. The family stayed together for a bit longer until it was time to leave. Sunggyu bid farewell first and headed back to his car. He drove to his sister’s apartment to spend the night there. His parents had been a bit disappointed that he didn’t sleep over at their house, but Sunggyu had given them some excuse about having to set up something in the nursery, which was not really a lie, except for the fact that it would probably be done in ten minutes.  
  
In the end, it actually took him an hour to set up the changing table for the baby. It wasn’t really his fault. The instruction manual was just full of errors. He wiped the sweat from his forehead when he was done. Sunggyu took a few steps back to regard his masterpiece. It wasn’t much but at least Seungah now had somewhere to change her baby’s diapers. He looked around the room with a faint smile. The walls were mint green, which complimented the light brown of most furniture in the room. The floor was solid parquet. Seungah had wanted carpet but Sunggyu told her it would be harder to clean. They could always put rugs in here later if she was scared of the baby hurting itself. All the dangerous corners of the room had already been softened ahead of time. The room was ready to accommodate a baby.  
  
Sunggyu yawned and stretched his tired limbs. He carried his body over to the kitchen for a late night snack. His sister was right about him again and he had certainly forgotten to eat anything. Sunggyu couldn’t even remember for sure if he had eaten breakfast before starting his travels. He looked into the fridge and was relieved to find some leftovers that Seungah had probably planned to eat today. He sniffed it shortly to make sure it was still fine. Sunggyu smiled. It smelled great. As expected of his older sister Seungah. She certainly knew how to cook. Something he wasn’t really good at. He put the small container into the microwave and heated it up, before heading over to the living room to turn the TV on.  
  
When the food was done, he sat down on the couch and watched a random TV show. At this time of the night, there wasn’t really anything interesting on, but Sunggyu didn’t particularly like eating in silence. Even in his own apartment he often had the radio or TV playing in the background when he did something. It gave him the feeling of not being entirely alone. Sometimes he regretted moving away from home. He had friends in Seoul and most of the time he was working anyways, but living alone was pretty lonely sometimes. Sunggyu could understand why some people chose to live in shared apartments even after finish their studies.  
  
_Maybe I should look for a roommate..._ Sunggyu knew he’d probably forget about it or be too lazy to actually look for someone. You couldn’t just let _anyone_ live in your apartment after all. Looking for the right person seemed like an exhausting process and he liked to keep his life easy. Also, living alone wasn’t all bad. No one nagged him for leaving his dirty clothes lying around for weeks until he actually washed them (only because his closet was almost empty). Sometimes he didn’t even clean the apartment for a month. If he had a roommate, they would surely nag him to clean up all the time.  
  
He let out a yawn and put the empty bowl on the table. Sunggyu lay down on the couch to continue watching the show for a while, but he soon fell asleep instead, dreaming of his cute little baby nephew.  



	3. Third Bump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something terrible happens...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't steal :-)
> 
> sorry for the drama, guyz~~~

Seungah had to stay at the hospital for two more days. Sunggyu visited her for a few hours both days and he even ate lunch with his parents. He also spent a lot of time looking around his hometown. Nothing had really changed much, as expected. Some of the stores he remembered had closed down, though. It was not really a surprise to Sunggyu. Their town was small and more and more people moved to the bigger cities. He couldn’t blame them since he had left his hometown behind as well. There was just _nothing_ here. Seeing how empty the streets were, reminded him once again why he had moved out of here.  
  
When little Haneul and his mother were finally able to leave the hospital and return home with him, Sunggyu had split feelings about it. Of course it was great not to be alone in the apartment anymore, but his nephew wasn’t exactly a quiet one. He cried in the car. He cried in the elevator and he surely did not stop crying when they reached Seungah’s home.  
  
“Does he ever stop?”  
  
His sister momentarily looked up from the crying baby in her arms to give him a gentle smile. “Usually when he sleeps.”  
  
“Tell me that is soon, because I’m about to go insane.”  
  
She chuckled. “If you don’t like it, you can sleep at our parents’ house.”  
  
Sunggyu grimaced. “No thank you. Besides, I promised to take care of you. Should I make something to eat?”  
  
“You? Cooking something edible?”  
  
“Well, actually mom dropped by with some containers full of food earlier today. I can warm something up for us.” He smiled sheepishly.  
  
“That would be perfect. I’ll try to find out if little Haneul is hungry in the meantime. Or maybe it’s his diaper. I hope I’ll get a hang of this soon.” Seungah muttered as she carried her baby away to the bathroom.  
  
Sunggyu hoped that she would find out what Haneul was so mad about, because the crying was causing him a headache. He had never cried that much at the hospital but maybe Sunggyu had just never been there when he threw a tantrum. His sister seemed pretty used to it after all. He was kind of glad that Haneul wasn’t his child. He preferred peaceful, long sleeps and calm evenings. Sunggyu went over to the kitchen to prepare a meal for them. It was good that their mother had prepared food for them. He really wasn’t the best cook and Seungah was surely not going to eat instant ramen with him.  
  
It didn’t take long for him to warm up the food. By the time he had the table all set Sunggyu wasn’t able to hear little Haneul’s cries anymore. Seungah left the nursery just a moment later. “Sorry, Gyu, I had to change his diapers and then I fed him afterwards, so it won’t get too late for his meal. Good news is: he is finally sleeping.”  
  
“You’re going to have your hands full with him for a while, huh?”  
  
She shrugged and sat down opposite of him at the table. “It’s what I chose. I think he’s worth every sleepless hour. Besides, I will make him pay me back when he’s older. He’ll be a genius and make lots of money to buy his mother a house.”  
  
Sunggyu scoffed at her words but he couldn’t help a smile from breaking through afterwards. “Tell him to pay back his uncle first.”  
  
Seungah laughed. “If he gives you the honor of designing my house, then that will be payback enough.”  
  
“ _Hmpf_ …we will see about that. Just don’t let him end up in this hell hole if he turns out to be a genius like your younger brother.”  
  
“Hell hole! Oh, Sunggyu, you don’t mean that. We have so many good memories here.” She smiled widely. “Living here is not that bad. At least the air is clean and you can see the stars at night.”  
  
“There are different kinds of people. I prefer money over air that smells like cow dung.”  
  
Seungah rolled her eyes. “You are exaggerating, Gyu. Family should be the most important. Come on, let’s eat before it gets cold. Mom made it for us after all.”  
  
_More like: for you._ But Sunggyu shrugged only in reply and then started digging in. Of course his mother’s food tasted incredible like always. Seungah had definitely taken after her in that. Sunggyu was more like his father when it came to cooking – a disaster. He would definitely miss this taste after returning to Seoul. _Maybe I should ask mom to pack me some containers to take home, but I doubt she’ll do that for me._  
  
“Are you going to be okay taking care of him by yourself?”  
  
His sister smiled. “I’ll try. Mom is only a phone call away anyways. If anything happens, I can ask her. Why? Are you offering your help? Will you stay back for me?”  
  
Sunggyu huffed. “I love you a lot, noona, but I’m not giving up my job for this. Besides, who will pay the bills if I lose my income? You’re jobless after all!“  
  
“You’re so awful sometimes!”  
  
“You mean lovable.” He smiled sweetly.  
  
“No!”  
  
“Cute?” Sunggyu opened his eyes wide and pushed his lower lip forward.  
  
Seungah threw a piece of bread at him. “Stop it before I throw up!”  
  
“Genuine?”  
  
She rolled her eyes. “I give up. Eat your food before it gets cold, Sunggyu. I’m starting to feel like I have two children instead of one.”  
  
Sunggyu chuckled but he did as told and concentrated on eating his food instead. It was always fun to joke around with his sister. He could always go back to being a brat around her. Well, at least as long as she didn’t need him to be the reliable brother. They ate in comfortable silence and he slowly started to dread the day he had to leave again. He had not right to complain, though. Just like Seungah had chosen the hard path by keeping the baby, he had chosen the lonely path of living far away. After a few days, he would get used to his big city life again and not miss this anymore.  
  
The silence between them was broken by the muffled screaming of a baby. Seungah raised her head in alert and stood up, immediately running to the nursery. Sunggyu huffed in his seat. Maybe he wouldn’t miss it much after all.  
  
  
  
**5 months later**

“I can’t believe this is already your last day here, Myungsoo.” Sunggyu shook the younger man’s hand with a smile.  
  
Myungsoo shrugged. “A year passes just like that. Don’t be sad, hyung. I will be back once I’ve finished my studies. Jungyeop-ssi promised to hire me full time.”  
  
He clicked his tongue. “Guess I need to watch out for my back in the future.”  
  
“I’m coming for your seat, Sunggyu-hyung!” The two men laughed together, before Myungsoo bowed deeply to him. “Thank you for taking care of me the past months. If it hadn’t been for the chance you gave me 5 months ago…I don’t think the boss would’ve offered me a position after graduation.”  
  
Sunggyu patted his back to make him straighten up again. “It’s your own achievement. I picked you because you’re an intelligent, young man with huge potential. You impressed me first, so there is nothing to thank me for.”  
  
Myungsoo straightened his back again and gave him a sudden stormy hug. “Wait for me, hyung!”  
  
He laughed. The younger man could be so cute if he wanted. Too bad he was already taken. Sunggyu just never had any luck with finding someone to hook up with. “I will. Good luck with your studies, Myungsoo.”  
  
The student nodded and gave him a last smile before turning around and leaving the office. Sunggyu went back to his chair and sat down. He really hoped the next intern would be as nice and capable as Myungsoo. He had really made Sunggyu’s life a little easier during his stay in their company. Most interns only had made his workload worse instead.  
  
He stretched his limbs shortly and then noticed the little LED light of his phone blinking at him with a yellow color. Sunggyu unlocked his phone with a smile. His sister had written him several messages already. He had totally forgotten to check his phone. He had been too engrossed in his work. The oldest message was from four hours ago.  
  
_8:32 am, Seungah:_ [ _Sunggyu-yah!! We’ve decided to make a trip to the beach with Haneul. Just to show him how beautiful the ocean is! Are you jealous~? Hehe!_ ]  
  
He huffed and scrolled down since there was still more to read.  
  
_8:49 am, Seungah:_ [ _I’m taking your silence as a yes!_ (*≧∀≦*)]  
  
_10:01 am, Seungah:_ [ _Still no answer? Are you mad at noona?_ ₍ᐢ ›̥̥̥༝ ‹̥̥̥ᐢ₎ _Don’t work too hard!_ ]  
  
_10:33 am, Seungah:_ [ _We’re heading off now! Cheer up, uncle Sunggyu!_ ]  
  
There was a picture attached to the message. It showed little Haneul in his baby seat, staring right into the camera with his big eyes that shone with curiosity. “The beach, huh? How can she tease me like this when she knows I have to work?”  
  
Sunggyu pursed his lips and wrote a reply: [ _Are you having fun without me? You guys must have a lot of free time to travel all the way to the beach with him_ （；¬＿¬)]  
  
He turned the display off again and threw his phone on the desk. Sunggyu glanced at the clock again and decided it would be a good time to eat lunch. His sister would surely spam him with pictures from their great beach adventure all too soon. He really needed some food in his stomach until then. Sunggyu huffed once more and grabbed his work phone, dialing the number of his colleague. “Minho, let’s eat lunch together.”  
  
“Only if you pay, hyung~” There was a chuckle on the other end of the line.  
  
Sunggyu snorted. “If anything, you should pay for your elder!”  
  
“No way! You earn much more money than me. Fine, I’ll pay for my own meal. Stingy!”  
  
“Aish, this brat!” Sunggyu muttered after hanging up.  
  
He stood up and pulled his wallet from his bag before leaving his office to meet up with Minho. Sunggyu locked the door behind himself and then went over to knock on Minho’s office door. “Come on. Hurry up!”  
  
Minho was a good colleague who took care of any legal matters that their company had to deal with. They had had a short relationship in the past, but they quickly noticed that they weren’t quite compatible enough for a long-term relationship. They were still friends, though, which Sunggyu felt incredibly grateful for. Since they were both single, they even met up sometimes to get rid of their sexual frustration. It was too bad that things with Minho had not worked out to be more than that.  
  
The door opened and the younger man grinned at him. “Why are you so cranky today? Did someone step on your tail, tiger?”  
  
“My sister boasted to me about travelling to the beach with my parents and her kid.” He replied as they walked towards the cafeteria.  
  
“But here you are, stuck at work while everyone is having fun without you.”  
  
“I’m trying to avoid seeing any pictures of the beach or I’ll go nuts in my office.”  
  
Minho laughed. “That’s understandable. Ah~ I want to go to the beach too. Maybe I should ask for a holiday. Should we go together?”  
  
The younger man winked at him and Sunggyu gave him a playful shove. “We wouldn’t see much of the beach then.”  
  
“True.”  
  
They entered the cafeteria and got their food, before heading over to a free table and sitting down. They talked some more while they ate, though their conversation soon became all about work. Both of them were quite busy every day and there was a lot to complain about.  
  
Sunggyu yawned after he was done with his lunch meal. “I could really use a nap now. Good thing someone had the idea to put a couch into my office.”  
  
“I don’t think boss will forgive even you if he catches you sleeping in your office.”  
  
“As if he-“  
  
“Sunggyu-ssi!” A voice interrupted him.  
  
He turned his head and saw Hyosung, one of the secretaries running over to their table. Her face was red and she seemed out of breath. Sunggyu frowned. “What’s wrong?”  
  
“I-“ She tried catching her breath. “Your smartphone kept ringing in your office but I couldn’t answer it, of course, but then someone tried to reach you on your work number as soon as your smartphone stopped ringing. I thought it must be really urgent and I transferred the call to my phone to answer it for you, since I know you were out to eat-“  
  
“Hyosung-ssi, get to the point please.” Her explanations were starting to make him worried. Why couldn’t she just say who called and why?  
  
She gulped and stepped a little closer to speak in a quieter tone. “It’s a hospital in-“  
  
“Hospital?” He jumped up from his chair.  
  
Hyosung looked conflicted. “Your family-“  
  
Sunggyu rushed past her and ran straight to his office. He crashed into the locked door and then panicky fished the key out of his pockets to unlock it. He went over to his desk and grabbed his smartphone with shaking hands. There were a bunch of missed calls from one and the same number. Sunggyu grabbed his hair with one hand and dialed the number. He held the phone to his ear and waited for someone to answer as all kind of scenarios rushed through his head. Nothing had happened, right? Maybe they had called the wrong number. Maybe-  
  
_Click._ “Hello this is-“  
  
“Kim Sunggyu speaking. You called my number, right?” He interrupted the lady’s greeting. “My colleague answered your call a moment ago and-“  
  
“Please calm down, sir. You said your name is Kim Sunggyu?”  
  
“Y-Yes…”  
  
“I’m sorry to tell you this but your family has been involved in a car accident. Miss Kim Seungah is currently still in operation as her state is very critical. You are her next in kin so we have to inform you-“  
  
“W-What…wait a second.” Sunggyu gasped. His knees buckled and he struggled to get into his chair. Tears of despair started to flood his eyes. “What about our parents? They should be-“  
  
“I’m sorry, Sunggyu-ssi. We are deeply sorry to inform you that your parents have passed away in the accident. They were already dead by the time the ambulance arrived.”  
  
He froze in his seat, his gaze fixated on some imaginary point in the distance. It had to be a dream. What was she talking about? His parents…dead?  
  
“Sunggyu-ssi, are you listening?”  
  
There was no way they were dead. He had just talked to his mother on the phone a day ago.  
  
“Sunggyu-ssi, please listen to me. I know it’s a lot to take in but your sister needs you right now. Is it possible for you to come to the hospital?”  
  
“I-I’ll come…” He replied weakly, only half-present with his mind. He grabbed a pen to write down the address when she started dictating it. It was a robotic movement without any emotion. Sunggyu couldn’t grasp the reality yet. It felt like a dream, a nightmare.  
  
“Maybe you can ask someone to drive you since you’re probably very affected by the news-“  
  
“I’ll be there. Just…just save my sister, okay?”  
  
“We’ll do our best.” She said some more words but Sunggyu barely listened.  
  
He noticed a movement in the doorframe and saw Minho looking at him with worried eyes. “Do you need help?”  
  
Sunggyu was about to say no but then he changed his mind. He hid his face in his palms at the tears overwhelmed him. “I guess I could use somebody.”  
  
Minho stepped closer and gave him a hug. “What happened?”  
  
“I don’t know…I don’t know what happened, Minho…” He muttered weakly between his sobs.  
  
The younger man patted his back slowly. “Is there anything I can do?”  
  
“Can you drive me to the hospital? It’s pretty far, though.” He didn’t trust his trembling limbs to get him there safely.  
  
Minho tightened his grip. “I’ll take you. Don’t worry.”  
  
How was he supposed to not worry? Sunggyu felt like a lifeless doll as Minho led him out of his office.  
  
Why wouldn’t he wake up?  
  
  
  
  
It took them almost three hours to arrive at the hospital where his sister was getting treated. They hadn’t spoken much during the drive, except for when Sunggyu had roughly explained the situation at the start. He hadn’t opened his mouth afterwards. He just kept staring out of the car window and kept hoping that he would wake up. Or that someone was going to tell him it was just a really sick joke to get him to visit them. How was he supposed to believe his parents were dead? Without even getting a chance to say goodbye…?  
  
“Sunggyu-hyung…we are here. Should I go inside with you?”  
  
“No. I…I’ll go alone.”  
  
Minho cast him a worried look as he got out of the car. “Call me if you need anything.”  
  
Sunggyu nodded weakly and then closed the door. He shuffled over to the hospital entrance with heavy steps. He was scared of going inside. Scared of finding out that everything was real, that his parents were dead. Maybe he was too late and even Seungah was gone…  
  
He licked his lips nervously and took another shaky breath before approaching the reception desk. The nurse sent him a friendly smile, which he would’ve appreciated in any other moment but right now he wanted to scream at her for it. “Hello sir. How can I help you?”  
  
Sunggyu swallowed hard. “My name is Kim Sunggyu. I got a phone call…someone told me my sister is in this hospital. Kim Seungah.”  
  
She nodded as he spoke and then looked at her computer screen to search her name. “Oh, yes, indeed she is here.”  
  
He clenched his fingers. “I-Is she okay?”  
  
The nurse tried to hide it but Sunggyu saw her smile slip for a second. “Seungah-ssi is currently in the ICU. I can’t give you her room number yet, but if you wait a short moment, the doctor in charge will come to get you. She will explain the details to you and bring you to her room.”  
  
He groaned in frustration. Why couldn’t he just meet his sister? The security guy a few feet away gave him a cautious glance and Sunggyu straightened his face again. He was about to turn away when he remembered something important. “Wait…one more question. What about her son? My nephew, Kim Haneul.”  
  
She smiled once more. “The baby is fine. He has a little trauma from the accident but he will be okay. Nurses are taking care of him at the moment.”  
  
Sunggyu felt at least a bit of relief. He was still unable to grasp the whole situation but this piece of news was at least something to hold on to. He walked away with heavy steps and waited for the doctor to arrive. Luckily, it didn’t take more than six minutes before an older lady in a white coat stopped in front of him. Sunggyu looked up curiously.  
  
“Mr. Kim Sunggyu?”  
  
“Yes…”  
  
“My name is Son Yejin. I’m in charge of your sister’s case. If you would please follow me…”  
  
“Are we going to see Seungah?” He asked impatiently as the female doctor led him through the corridors of the hospital.  
  
She nodded and turned her head to him. “But there are some things I need to tell you before we enter her room. I’m sure you’ve already been told that she and your parents were involved in a car accident?”  
  
Sunggyu swallowed hard. “Yes…but I…I don’t understand what happened.”  
  
The doctor stopped in front of a door. An eerie silence reigned in the corridor. There were no other people to be seen anywhere. “We were informed that your sister’s car collided with a truck on the road. The police will probably contact you soon and give you more detailed information to the course of events. Miss Seungah and her child were brought here around 12 am. She has been injured very badly. A lot of her bones are broken and important vitals were hurt, including a sharp object that pierced her lungs. Her head was damaged very badly too. We’ve done our best to stop the bleeding and take out any foreign objects but…”  
  
“But? What ‘but’?” He asked in panic. Sunggyu was close to grabbing her or maybe shoving her away to see his sister. She had to be okay. She just had to be alright.  
  
Yejin sighed. “I know this must be hard after losing your parents but…we’re afraid Seungah-ssi won’t make it through the night. Her injuries are very severe and the machines are barely keeping her alive.”  
  
Sunggyu could only stare at her. The doctor put a hand on his shoulder in comfort. “If you need a moment-“  
  
“No…please let me see her.” He needed to see her with his own eyes.  
  
Yejin nodded after a short pause and opened the door. It led to a little room with a sink and a cupboard. “Clean your hands and disinfect them please. You can leave your bag in here.”  
  
Sunggyu did it with the same robotic movements with which he had noted down the address earlier. The doctor opened the other door of the room and he followed her. He froze in the doorstep when his eyes fixed on the hospital bed. Seungah was lying on it. Her limbs were in all kinds of casts and slings, machines connected to her body left and right. Sunggyu could hear the heart monitor beep calmly and every time she took a breath, the sound echoed through the whole room.  
  
She looked like death.  
  
He stumbled back and Yejin stepped closer quickly to support him. “There’s a chair. Sit down please. I’m going to get you a glass of water.”  
  
Sunggyu was forced to sit in the chair next to the bed and he looked at his sister in trance. If she hadn’t told him that was his sister, Sunggyu wouldn’t have recognized her. Her beautiful face was framed with bandages and where he could see skin, it was scarred. Tears filled his eyes and he desperately reached out to find her hand under the blanket. He tried to find the right words as he squeezed her hand, but Sunggyu could not think of anything. His mind was blank and he had a lump in his throat.  
  
Yejin returned with the glass of water. Sunggyu shook his head first but then he grabbed it and drank all of the water in one gulp. He put the glass on the table and looked back at his sister. “What are the chances the she’ll make it through the night and recover?”  
  
“Less than 10%. I’m sorry.” She took a step back. “I’ll give you a moment alone. Or do you have any important questions to her condition?”  
  
“Is she…can I talk to her? Will she hear me?”  
  
She looked at Seungah shortly. “She should be able to hear you but she hasn’t woken up since the surgery ended two hours ago.”  
  
Sunggyu nodded shortly and the doctor gave him a short bow before leaving the room. “Press the button if there is an emergency. A nurse will be just outside.”  
  
The door closed behind her and he heaved a sigh. Sunggyu laid her hand on the blanket and gave it a kiss. “Seungah…tell me this is a dream. Maybe I fell over on my chair and hit my head. You’re going to laugh at me when I wake up, right?”  
  
His voice shook towards the end and Sunggyu lowered his head. Tears dropped down on his lap. “Mom and dad can’t be gone. We had so many fights and I never really apologized…I can’t even remember what the last thing was I said to them. Seungah, please tell me they’ll come in any second to scold me. I wish mom would shout at me how useless I am.”  
  
Sunggyu broke down in his chair. His shoulders shook as sobs wrecked his body. The loss of his parents hit him hard. They were gone. Dead. He’d never be able to talk to them again. He suddenly longed to hear their voices so much, even if it were only shouting or nagging. Sunggyu had never had the best relationship with his parents but now that they were gone…he wished he had tried harder. He wished he had spent more time with them. How much he had wasted precious time instead of using it…  
  
“I’m sorry…I’m so sorry…please don’t take Seungah away as well.” Sunggyu choked out. He hoped that god would show mercy and not take his sister yet. Haneul needed her. Sunggyu needed her.  
  
“You can’t leave your son alone. Didn’t you say you’d take care of him? Didn’t you want to see him get rich and buy you a house?”  
  
Seungah didn’t answer and he continued to weep. His heart felt like it was being torn to pieces. Sunggyu was afraid of losing her. Afraid of being left alone. “Please don’t leave me…”  
  
“Seungah!”  
  
She didn’t flinch.  
  
“What am I going to do without you?”  
  
  
  
In his sorrow, he barely noticed time passing. When Seungah’s heart machine went dead, he had already reached a point at which he knew that he had to let his sister go. Her condition had worsened continuously over the last hour. She had not opened her eyes or shown any signs of awakening even once. Sunggyu had prayed for her but it had been in vain. Together with the doctor, he had decided not to reanimate her beforehand. There was no sense in prolonging her suffering and the doctor had already told him her chances to recover were slim. Even if they could get her back, she’d only return to maybe an hour more of pain before her organs gave out again.  
  
Seungah was declared as braindead at 4:12 am. They put a cloth over her face and he left the room in a daze.   
  
He wandered through the hospital until he found the pediatric ward. Sunggyu asked a nurse where he could find Haneul and she hesitantly showed him the way after another nurse came to confirm his identity. Haneul was crying in his crib as if he already knew that his mother was gone. Sunggyu looked at the wailing baby with teary eyes.  
  
“Do you remember me, Haneul? I’m uncle Sunggyu.” He asked the baby in a quiet voice.  
  
He picked Haneul up carefully and let the baby rest against his chest. He smiled shortly as he remembered how Seungah had schooled him how to hold a baby correctly. Haneul sure had grown a lot since then. The boy continued to cry as Sunggyu rocked him softly.  
  
“Are you sad? I’m sad too. There’s only the two of us now, Haneul-ah.”  
  
The baby didn’t stop its heart-wrenching cries. “What are we going to do now?”  
  
Of course Haneul hardly knew the answer to that. Sunggyu didn’t know what to do. He was the only relative Haneul had left, except for his good-for-nothing father. What was going to happen to the child now? Who was going to care for it? Sunggyu didn’t have a clue about raising a child. He barely knew how to hold the boy without choking him. Would he even have a chance to get the custody? What else would await little Haneul? A life in children’s home until some strangers adopted him?  
  
“You wouldn’t like that, would you?” As expected, Haneul cried in reply. Sunggyu sighed and carried him over to the window, glancing out at the dark night sky. “Seungah…would you want me to care for him? I think you would.”  
  
Sunggyu looked down at the crying kid again. Haneul was his only relative left in this world, not counting the uncles and aunts that he hadn’t had seen since forever. They would surely not take care of the baby. But was Sunggyu even qualified to take care of a 5 month old baby? Probably not. Heck, he had to work all day. There was no time to care for a toddler. Haneul was not a dog you could leave at home while you were at work.  
  
He sat down on a chair nearby as he kept rocking the baby. Sunggyu was kind of glad that he kept on crying because he was loud enough to hide Sunggyu’s sobs. He kept the boy in a tight, protective hold. No matter what was going to happen, he would make sure Haneul was safe and that he would live the life Seungah had imagined for him. _I’ll protect him, noona. I swear I won’t let anything happen to him._  



	4. Fourth Bump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Funerals happen and Haneul finally comes home~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments are welcome ;w;
> 
> Don't steal!

Sunggyu looked at the papers in his hands again and sighed for the nth time. “I know I asked you for some kind of sign, Seungah, but there was no need to be so…direct about it.”  
  
His words were not more than a quiet mutter. His eyes traveled down to the paragraph that had shocked him a few minutes ago: _[…]In case I die before my son comes of age, I want my brother, Kim Sunggyu, to receive full custody of my son, Kim Haneul. My apartment, including all of-[…]_  
  
He sighed again and put the paper down. Sunggyu could feel his eyes burning and he tried to blink the tears away. He wondered why his sister had even written a will already. She had still been young after all. Who thought about their death at such a young age and decided how to split their belongings to family members or friends? The notary told him that she had written the will about three months ago because she had wanted to make sure that her child would have a secure future. She had been alone after all and wanted someone to be there for her son if she left suddenly. Of course it had been a good idea but Sunggyu couldn’t read her will without feeling depressed and angry at the same time. Why did she have to die?  
  
“Sunggyu-ssi.” He looked up at the notary again.  
  
“Sorry, what did you say?”  
  
The old man fixed his glasses and gave him a neutral look. “Although she has declared you as Haneul’s guardian, you do not have to accept the responsibility. It concerns the life of a little child after all. If you do not feel ready to assume full responsibility, you can give Haneul up for adoption. I want you to think about this very carefully. I also have to inform you that even _if_ you decide to become his guardian, it’s possible for a judge to revoke your rights for custody in court, should they deem you not able to take care of a little child.”  
  
He blinked. “They can do that?”  
  
“Of course, you are supposed to take care of another human being and not a plant, Sunggyu-ssi. The procedures are similar to when a family wants to adopt a child. A social worker will check your background. Things like what your job is, the state of your apartment or if you have any records with the police. From what I can tell those things should not be the problem for you, but it’s still possible that the court will let social workers check up on you regularly to make sure that you are raising Haneul properly. That is, _if_ you decide to accept your sister’s will.”  
  
Sunggyu swallowed. He looked at the – slightly crumbled – piece of paper in his hands. Ever since that night in the hospital with Haneul in his arms, he had wondered what would be the right decision. Sunggyu didn’t want to do anything that could affect Haneul’s future negatively after all. He had sent silent prayers to his sister to ask for a sign from her. His decision had continuously swayed between stepping forward as his legal guardian or allowing Haneul to grow up with a proper mother and father. But then he had kept imagining how Haneul would maybe never find out the truth about his mother then. He might not remember her when he’s all grown up and his new family would not have any stories to tell, even if he did become curious one day. Sunggyu would have tons of stories to tell about Seungah. He would tell him who his mother was and how much she had loved him. Could a new family offer him that?  
  
“I want to raise him.” He spoke up confidently after thinking over his decision once more. “It’s my sister’s wish and I was thinking about it even before I read her will. Haneul needs family, not strangers.”  
  
The notary nodded. “What about her apartment? She left it to you, as well as all of her belongings that are in it. You will have to decide if you’re going to sell it or use it, maybe you even want to rent it out to someone else.”  
  
He felt a headache coming. And possibly more tears. There were so many things to decide, so many responsibilities suddenly weighing down his shoulder. Sunggyu already had an apartment in Seoul, as well as a job. It would make no sense to keep the place, but he wasn’t sure if he had the guts to actually sell it or let someone else live there. They had put so much work into making the apartment into something decent for Haneul to grow up in, plus the beautiful nursery. Sunggyu wasn’t even sure if he was allowed to live with a child in his apartment in Seoul. There was not even a room free for a kid there. He’d need to look for a new apartment.  
  
Sunggyu groaned and buried his face in his hands. “You don’t have to decide immediately, Sunggyu-ssi. I understand that this is all a lot to process right now with the planning of the funeral and all. You should take your time with deciding on the next steps. Do you have any more questions? I can summarize all the important points for you and send them to you in an email if you want.”  
  
He straightened his back again and looked at the notary. “Yeah…that would be good. Thank you. I can’t think of anything else. Right now I’m just-”  
  
Sunggyu motioned with his hands helplessly. The old man nodded. “Like I said, that is understandable. I will send you an email later. Go home for now, Sunggyu-ssi, and try to rest a bit. You look like you haven’t rested at all.”  
  
He stood up and shook the notary’s hand. How was he supposed to sleep after everything that had happened? He could not close his eyes for a second without drowning in memories. “I’ll do that. Thank you for your help.”  
  
With heavy steps, he left the notary’s office again. Sunggyu stuffed his hands deep into his pockets as he stepped outside. He swayed a little but quickly caught himself. He couldn’t collapse now. There was still an appointment with the funeral parlor that he had to keep. He also had to visit Haneul at the little clinic of their hometown. The baby was still being taken care of there while his fate wasn’t clear yet. His visits to the hospital were about the only ray of hope in his life right now. Whenever he managed to make Haneul smile, it seemed to give him new strength to go on.  
  
Sunggyu glanced at his watch. He still had about an hour left until he had to be at the funeral parlor. Should he go and visit Haneul for a few minutes? The ringing of his cellphone ripped Sunggyu from his pondering. He stopped to fish the device from his pocket. “Hello?”  
  
“Hyung, it’s me, Minho. You haven’t called since I dropped you off at your hometown two days ago.”  
  
He frowned and rubbed his temple with his free hand. “I wrote an email to the boss. I said that I’ll be busy with…stuff. I will call again when I have time. I’m busy you know.”  
  
Sunggyu really didn’t want to be like that but his head was aching and he didn’t have the nerve to talk to anyone right now. His life was a mess and he was struggling to get it under control again. His whole family was gone suddenly and Sunggyu was walking around like a lifeless zombie from one appointment to the next, just trying to keep on going and never stop. He was afraid of breaking down again as soon as he stopped being busy.  
  
“I wasn’t calling because of work. I’m worried about you as your friend, hyung. Are you eating and sleeping properly? I know it’s hard but you need to take care of yourself. If you need me, I could ask Jungyeop-ssi and maybe come over for a few days.”  
  
He sighed. Sunggyu couldn’t remember the last time he had eaten something. He was sure that instant coffee didn’t count. “No...no , don’t come here. I’m eating properly. Don’t worry.”  
  
“Really? What did you have for breakfast?”  
  
“Cornflakes…with milk.” He lied.  
  
Minho snorted. “Hyung, you hate cornflakes, especially when they are soaked in milk. Please buy yourself something to eat. Do you want Haneul to lose his uncle as well?”  
  
“No! Of course not!” He replied with a raised voice. The other pedestrians gave him weird looks for his shout and Sunggyu ducked his head. “I’ll eat something, okay? Stop worrying about me. I’ll hang up now.”  
  
“Sunggyu-“  
  
He pressed the red phone symbol on his screen and then tucked his phone in his front pocket again. Sunggyu sighed. He didn’t want to be rude to Minho but the other man should stop worrying about him. Minho had a life to live, a job to do. He couldn’t spend his day worrying over a friend. They weren’t more than that after all. Sunggyu didn’t want to drag another life down with his. He was thankful to have a friend that cared for his wellbeing, but right now Sunggyu needed to make it through this alone.  
  
With a sigh, he continued his way down the street. Sunggyu didn’t walk very far, though. His gaze went to the Korean restaurant across the street. He really didn’t feel hungry at all but Minho’s words were still ringing in his ears. Maybe it was better to eat something after all. He couldn’t risk fainting and missing the appointment. Or possibly fall asleep during his time with Haneul.  
  
  
  
The funeral was normal. It was nothing big or fancy, even though Sunggyu’s money could have bought him some extras here and there. But he hadn’t wanted anything special and grand. His family wouldn’t have wanted it. His parents had never liked his money much and Seungah would have wanted him to use his money for Haneul instead. Only their closest relatives came to the funeral, though Sunggyu didn’t really feel close to any of them. But it had been sort of a must. His mother would’ve been mad, had he not invited them. It was funny how she was gone and yet Sunggyu still imagined what she would say or do.  
  
None of the guests stayed for very long after the ceremony was over. They bid farewell to Sunggyu’s dead parents and sister, snatched a bit from the buffet and then took off. Only when the last guest was gone, did he allow himself to let go of the tears. He knelt in front of his family’s portraits and lowered his head. Sunggyu wept quietly. Big drops fell from his eyes and onto the balled fists on his lap. They were gone for real now – only their ashes remaining – and it had seemed like no one cared. Sure, some people had shed a tear here and there and uttered their condolences to him, but no one had genuinely asked how he was or what was going to happen to Haneul. Sunggyu wondered who would even come if he died now. Would anyone care at all?  
  
He didn’t know for how long he actually knelt on the ground and wept, but eventually the tear stopped. Sunggyu grabbed another tissue and blew his nose. He wiped it clean and folded the tissue tidily afterwards. He stood up and swayed for a second because his legs had become numb from sitting for too long. Sunggyu stretched his limbs shortly and then looked at the three pictures cleanly lined up in front of him.  
  
“Mom. Dad. I hope you’re at a better place now. I know things between us were never too good…you were stubborn and so was I. But no matter how much mom’s nagging annoyed me…now I kind of miss it. You must be worried how I’m going to care for Haneul. I worry too, but I’ll try my best to make you proud of me. Look after Seungah for me, okay? And thank you for caring so much for Haneul. You didn’t really show it but you never wanted him to be adopted by someone else, right? I wish Seungah would’ve known the contents of your will. She would have been happy to know that you cared so much.”  
  
His parents’ will had him surprised a lot. They wanted their house to be sold and the money was supposed to be divided between Seungah, Sunggyu _and_ Haneul. Their grandson was supposed to get 50% of the money, while the siblings shared the other 50% evenly. How surprised Seungah would have been, had she known about it. Their parents, especially their mother, had always seemed a bit distant to their grandson, but it seemed like they had fully accepted him as part of their family. His parents had never been the best at expressing their feelings. Regarding Seungah and his share, he had told the notary to transfer all the money to Haneul’s account once the house was sold. He had enough money and would rather invest the money from the house sale in Haneul’s future.  
  
Sunggyu glanced at his sister’s portrait. He took a shaky breath and gave her a short smile. “I wish you were here, noona. Haneul misses you a lot. He hasn’t really talked yet but he cries a lot. I think he knows you’re gone. He always calms down when I put some old sweater or scarf from you into the crib next to him. You should see him snuggle into them. It’s really cute. He’s a wonderful child, just like his mother.”  
  
He made a short pause to blow his nose once more. Sunggyu blinked the tears away. “I’ll do my best to raise him properly. He will know all about you. I’ll make sure that he knows who his mother was. I will make him visit your grave every year as long as I live. Those are my promises to you, so you must promise me something in return: watch over him. And me. If you see me messing up, please don’t hesitate to send me a sign. A brick or a lightning strike…I don’t know.”  
  
Sunggyu laughed shortly. “Sorry…I shouldn’t joke around. I love you, noona. I miss you a lot. Watch over us, okay?”  
  
  
  
The day after the funeral, he was finally allowed to take Haneul home with him. Social workers would still check up on him regularly for a while, especially once he found another apartment. For now Sunggyu had decided to use Seungah’s apartment. It had the necessary equipment to take care of a child and Haneul would return to the surroundings he knew. Sunggyu didn’t want to shock him by bringing him to the chaotic world of Seoul all of a sudden. The poor child had gone through enough.  
  
His boss had allowed him to work from his hometown for now. Not until forever, of course, but Jungyeop had sympathized with him. Losing all of your family was nothing easy to overcome. Sunggyu was glad that his boss didn’t fire him for taking so many days off work and then declaring that he couldn’t return to Seoul any time soon. He could not imagine finding a new job in this town – not as an architect. Working from here was not a long-time solution, though. There were meetings that he had to attend in Seoul, people to meet and places to visit.  
  
Sunggyu parked his car in front of the apartment complex and glanced at the sleeping baby in the backseat. He was quite relieved that Haneul hadn’t woken up even once during the drive. He wasn’t sure if he would be able to drive while a baby cried in the back. Sunggyu unbuckled his seatbelt with a small smile and got out of the car. He closed the door slowly, careful not to wake his nephew up. Then he opened the other door and unbuckled Haneul’s seatbelt. He lifted the baby seat along with Haneul out of the car and closed the door again. After locking his car, Sunggyu carried the baby over to the building.  
  
On the second floor, he almost ran into one of the tenants. Her huge dog lunged at him, just trying to give him a friendly hug probably, but Sunggyu got scared and almost fell down the stairs because of the shock. The dog barked at him. “Oh, sorry. He isn’t normally like that. He just likes babies a lot.”  
  
_To breakfast?_ Sunggyu straightened his face. He was about to reply when Haneul suddenly started crying. The barking seemed to have woken him up. The lady gave him an apologetic look. “I’m sorry. Now he has woken up. Oh wait, isn’t that little Haneul?”  
  
“Ah, you know him?” Sunggyu rocked the baby seat softly in a try to calm him down again.  
  
She smiled at him. “I’ve seen Seungah with him a few times but we haven’t really talked much. I’m guessing you are her brother? You look sort of alike. Are you visiting her?”  
  
He grimaced shortly. Apparently, the news hadn’t reached everyone in the house yet. But it wasn’t like someone had announced it loudly. “I’m living here for now. Seungah is…well…she…died in an accident.”  
  
Her eyes widened. “Oh no…”  
  
Sunggyu could see her beginning to form the stereotypical ‘My condolences. I’m so sorry for your loss blab bla’ speech, so he quickly used the wailing Haneul as an excuse to continue his way. Sunggyu didn’t want to hear it. He couldn’t bear hearing it right now. He fled behind the safe confines of Seungah’s apartment and leaned against the door with his back. Haneul was still crying, obviously not feeling any better after being shaken around so much in the baby seat.  
  
He glanced at the crying baby. “Sorry…the dog was scary, wasn’t it? But hey…we’re home.”  
  
Sunggyu carried Haneul further into the apartment and to his surprise, he stopped wailing. Instead, his nephew looked around curiously. He raised his tiny hand to point at _something_ – Sunggyu wasn’t sure at what exactly, but he doubted the baby knew what it wanted to point at. “A! Ba! E!”  
  
“I have no idea what you want to say.” He mumbled a little amused by the weird baby language. The nurses told him that Haneul might start trying to speak soon, though it would hardly be any more than nonsense until he got a little older.  
  
“Da! Da!” Haneul continued his rant. The baby looked up to him with big eyes.  
  
Sunggyu gave him a smile. “Are you happy to be home? Want to take a nap in your crib? Yeah, I’m sure you’d love that. And in the meanwhile, uncle Sunggyu can prepare your dinner. I bought a lot of different products because I didn’t know what you would like. Seungah didn’t tell me what you like to eat. Are you a picky eater?”  
  
Haneul didn’t reply anything and instead cooed funnily. “I hope that means no.”  
  
He walked over to the nursery and sat the baby seat down on the little table to get Haneul out of it. The baby observed him curiously as he loosened all straps. Sunggyu carefully lifted him up and the little guy cheered, seemingly excited by the change of view. “You like that?”  
  
Haneul squealed happily and smiled. It felt so easy to forget all of his worries when the baby smiled at him like that. Sunggyu played around with him for a few minutes, lowering and raising his arms again and again until his arms started to hurt. “Uncle Sunggyu doesn’t have a lot of arm strength. Sorry, Haneul-ah. I’ll work on that, okay?”  
  
He finally took off Haneul’s jacket and beanie next. “Do me a favor and take a little nap for a while.”  
  
Sunggyu placed the boy into his crib and gave the little mobile hanging above a nudge. There were animals of different colors attached to the thin strings. Seungah had made it with her own hands for Haneul. He smiled in relief when the baby seemed distracted by the moving animals. “Look at how calm you are. Maybe I’m a natural at taking care of babies.”  
  
Haneul ignored him and instead tried to reach the animals with his tiny hands. Sunggyu took off with a smile and left the door open just in case. It was the darkest time of his life currently but somehow Haneul managed to make him smile so easily. It was magical somehow. Sunggyu decided to just feed him milk for now. Formula – that was the name of it. He had no idea what Seungah’s feeding schedule had been for the boy. He’d need to find out by himself. Sunggyu had tried to inform himself about 5 month old babies as much as he could during the little time he had had to prepare. There was so much to know and his head still felt like it was bursting from all the information.  
  
He opened the book the doctor had recommended him. There was a yellow bookmark on the page with the bottle feeding instructions. Sunggyu skipped the ‘sterilizing bottles’ part. He had done that in the morning when he had been unable to sleep any longer. “ _Offer 2.5 ounces of formula per pound of body weight each day._ How much does he weigh again?”  
  
The nurse had written that down for him somewhere. Sunggyu scratched the back of his neck and tried to remember where he put the note. “My bag. It should be in my bag…”  
  
He rushed out of the kitchen to grab his bag that he had lazily discarded in the corridor. Sunggyu rummaged through the pockets. “Why didn’t I put it away safely? How am I supposed to know how much powder to use?”  
  
Sunggyu was still in the middle of his search when he heard baby cries coming from the direction of the nursery. “Oh no...didn’t he fall asleep? Ah, shit.”  
  
He rubbed his temples and stood up again to check on Haneul. “What’s wrong, Haneul-ah?”  
  
His nephew just looked up to him with teary eyes and continued to wail. Sunggyu picked him up carefully and sniffed his bottom. _Sniffing a baby bottom…I’m glad nobody sees me doing this._ At least the diaper didn’t reek. Not yet. “Seems to be okay. If you’re hungry, you’ll still have to wait a bit.”  
  
Sunggyu put him down again with a heavy heart. Haneul continued crying. “I can’t cook and hold you at the same time. Just be a little more patient with me, okay?”  
  
He left the nursery again to go back to his bag. Sunggyu looked through the rest of the possible hiding spots and let out a sigh of relief when he finally found the note. Haneul kept crying in the other room but he ignored it with a heavy heart. Sunggyu continued with his quest to prepare formula for the baby, though he kept speaking loudly to Haneul as he prepared everything. He didn’t know if it helped at all, but at least his nephew knew he was still there. His book told him to use boiled water if he wanted to be sure no bacteria survived. He cooked the water first and then mixed it with the suggested amount of powder. Afterwards, Sunggyu put it in cold water to let it cool down again.  
  
While the milk was cooling down, he went to the nursery to get Haneul. The baby’s face was an angry red color and Sunggyu muttered apologies as he picked him up again. “Dinner is almost ready. I hope you’re crying because you’re hungry.”  
  
He rocked the baby in his arms and tried humming a random song to calm him down. He really needed to learn some lullabies. Sunggyu carried Haneul over to the kitchen while rocking him. “Yummy milk. Mmhm…does that not make you want to stop crying immediately? No? Well, it was worth a try.”  
  
Sunggyu tested the temperature of the bottle but it still seemed too hot. “Looks like we still got some time to kill. How about I check your diaper? Just in case you made a mess in there.”  
  
Checking the baby’s diaper was not exactly a task he had looked forward to a lot. There was no way to get around it, though. He had promised to care for Haneul and that included keeping him clean down there. Sunggyu lowered him down on the changing table in the nursery and looked at the fluffy white thing. It couldn’t be so hard to open those things and put them on. He had built things way more complicated than that!  
  
Sunggyu unfastened the tabs left and right. They hadn’t been so hard to find. He put down the front of the diaper and scrunched his nose shortly because it did seem dirty. It reeked. “You just did that, didn’t you? I checked before and it didn’t smell!”  
  
He pulled the dirty diaper away and put it aside for now. Sunggyu sighed. “I guess I have to clean your bottom. Need a wet cloth or something. Don’t go anywhere!”  
  
Quickly, he hurried to the bathroom to soak a cloth in lukewarm water. It seemed to be the logical choice for a proper temperature. Sunggyu dashed back to the nursery and his eyes widened when he saw Haneul dangerously leaning over the edge of the table. He jumped the rest of the distance between them and grabbed the baby before he could fall down.  
  
“YAH! What are you doing?” He shouted in shock. The baby wailed loudly and Sunggyu immediately felt sorry for shouting but god knows what could have happened. “Sorry…I’m sorry, Haneul. Stop crying please. I should’ve kept an eye on you. It’s my fault. Ssh…ssh.”  
  
He held the baby to his chest and wiped the changing table shortly with the cloth. Just as he wanted to put Haneul down again, he felt something warm against his chest. Or rather, he felt something warm soak his shirt. Sunggyu gasped and held the baby away from him. The rest of the pee landed on the ground to his feet. Sunggyu gritted his teeth and tried his hardest not to get mad.  
  
Haneul smiled and then laughed cheerfully. Sunggyu raised an eyebrow. “You find that funny, huh? Peeing on your uncle?”  
  
The baby squealed and shook his tiny fists. He snorted. “I should leave you this dirty so that you may learn from it, but your mother would kill me.”  
  
Sunggyu sighed again and carried Haneul over to the bathroom this time. He cleaned the boy carefully at the sink, not letting him out of his sight or hold again. Haneul squirmed and started crying again as Sunggyu cleaned his lower body, but he firmly ignored it and continued. “It’s just water. Why are you crying like I’m dipping you in hot lava? I wonder if I was that bad as a child.”  
  
He dried the kid properly with a towel when he was all clean again. Sunggyu wrapped him up in the towel so that he couldn’t crawl away and placed him on the rug shortly to pull off his dirty shirt. He threw it into the sink for now and picked – the still crying – Haneul up again. “Little troublemaker. You better not pee into the towel.”  
  
With the wrapped up baby in his hands, he went back to the nursery to put a new diaper on him. Sunggyu struggled more with the ‘putting the diaper on’ part than with the ‘taking it off’ one. Good thing there were instructions coming with it. When the fluffy white diaper was safely wrapped around Hanuel’s lower body, the baby stopped crying and slowly calmed down again. Sunggyu raised an eyebrow. “You could’ve worn this clean diaper much earlier, had you not peed on us!”  
  
Haneul only cooed in reply. Sunggyu rolled his eyes shortly and put fresh clothes on the baby. “At least your bottle should have the right temperature now. Just let me put on a shirt, okay?”  
  
He placed the boy in the crib, just to be safe, and then quickly cleaned the floor. Afterwards, he headed off to the living room, where his suit case was still lying around. Sunggyu had slept on the couch the past days and lived out of his case. He hadn’t dared to enter Seungah’s bedroom and sleep in her bed or occupy her wardrobe. He hadn’t even cleared out her old stuff yet. Sunggyu was afraid of going in there and seeing too many things that reminded him of his dead sister.  
  
After putting on another shirt, he went to the kitchen first to check the temperature. He could hear Haneul starting to cry again and Sunggyu wondered for a moment how that little boy had so much endurance. Shouldn’t he sleep like a stone after so much wailing? Sunggyu pulled the bottle out and deemed the temperature okay. It didn’t feel too hot anymore and he read in the book that babies liked the milk warm. Sunggyu looked at the instructions on how to feed a baby once more, before heading back to the nursery.  
  
“Haneul-ah, look what uncle has for you - a bottle of milk!” He announced cutely with a high-pitched tone as he walked inside. Sunggyu felt like an idiot for talking stupidly like that but at least no one was watching.  
  
He picked Haneul up again and the baby stretched out his little hands to grab the bottle. Sunggyu chuckled. “So you are hungry after all. Finally stopped crying, didn’t you?”  
  
Sunggyu held him in one arm while he maneuvered the tip of the bottle – why did it have to be called a teat or nipple? Okay, it looked like one, but Sunggyu felt strangely embarrassed when he called it that. Haneul’s tiny hands grabbed the bottle from both sides (well, it was more _touching_ than actual holding) and he opened his small mouth to drink from the nipple. He hungrily drank the milk and Sunggyu watched him with a smile. He tried to remember the 45 degree angle and all the other million tips that he had read about in the book. It didn’t seem to be too hard, seeing how Haneul greedily drank his dinner. He shortly wondered how Seungah had done all of this for 5 months. He already felt exhausted just taking care of him for about an hour.  
  
“What did I agree to, huh? Try to meet me halfway, okay, Haneul? I’m a total beginner.” Sunggyu told the boy and rocked the drinking baby softly.  
  
Haneul drank it all to his surprise. When Haneul was done, he patted the boy’s back until he burped. “Did you like that? Mhm, tasty instant milk, can’t think of anything better for dinner. Bet you want to sleep now.”  
  
Indeed, Haneul fell asleep in his arms after a few minutes of gentle rocking. Sunggyu carefully placed the sleeping baby into the crib. He pulled the small blanket over the boy and watched him curl his tiny fingers around it. Sunggyu stroked his short mob of hair and then walked over to the door to turn off the light. He left the door open, just in case Haneul started crying again and needed him.  
  
With a yawn, Sunggyu sat down on the couch. It wasn’t even 8 pm yet, but he felt dead tired. His stomach grumbled and he remembered that he still hadn’t eaten anything. Sighing, he stood up again and went to the kitchen to get himself something to eat. He needed the strength to take care of Haneul. He could not run around hungry when he had a baby to take care of.  
  
  
  
In the end, Haneul did not sleep for very long. Sunggyu had just gone to bed when the baby started crying again. He spent almost an hour trying to get him to sleep again with rocking, toys and lullabies. The second time he woke up, it was 3 am in the morning. He had to change Haneul’s diaper because it was dirty again. It was incredibly shocking how much a baby could poop in its sleep. His second time of changing a diaper went a little smoother, though it definitely smelled more. Around 4:30 am, Haneul was once again dozing in his crib and Sunggyu staggered back to the couch with heavy limbs.  
  
“God…I hope he sleeps a little longer this time. I should buy more coffee tomorrow.” He closed his eyes again and thanks to the exhaustion, Sunggyu quickly drifted off again into a deep slumber.  
  
  
  
His next days were not much different than that. Every single day was a struggle with Haneul. Sunggyu had to feed him, bath him, change his diapers, play with him or try to make him sleep without much success. He didn’t get much work done for his job, because he couldn’t really leave Haneul out of his sight for even one second and if he left the boy in the crib to play safe, his nephew would continue to blare loudly until he was picked up again. He noticed that Haneul like to be held and even when he played with toys alone, Sunggyu had to watch him constantly, because the second he looked away Haneul would notice it. And then a whiny rant of “ba ba da ma BA” baby jabber would start. Haneul wanted to be his center of attention at all times. Sometimes though, he could hold him or talk to him as much as he wanted and the baby just kept on crying. It took him a while to notice that Haneul would only calm down when he saw a picture of his mother during those phases. Maybe his mind could not really process it, but the baby boy missed his mother dearly.  
  
  
  
On their 5th day together, Haneul got sick. He started having diarrhea and when his temperature went up as well, Sunggyu had no choice but to take him to the hospital in the middle of the night. He was worried sick and he didn’t really know what to do. He could hardly give the boy the same pills he would take. Sunggyu quickly put a jacket and shoes on him, before lifting him in his baby seat. Haneul kept crying throughout the whole process, obviously in a bad mood because of his health state. Sunggyu put some shoes on as well and left the apartment in a hurry, running down the stairs to the ground floor. He hurried to his car and put Haneul’s baby seat on the passenger’s seat for now. He knew that wasn’t really where he was supposed to sit but Sunggyu wanted to keep an eye on him. He fastened the seatbelt and ran over to the driver’s seat.  
  
“Don’t worry, Haneul-ah. You’ll be better soon. Let’s go see the doctor, okay?” He continued talking to the baby as he started the car engine.  
  
It was really hard to concentrate on driving since he was physically and mentally exhausted. Not to mention that Haneul cried and screamed badly the entire time. It worried Sunggyu on the whole way and he jumped a red light more than once. Luckily, nothing happened since the streets were pretty deserted at this time of the night. In Seoul it would never be this empty on the streets but this was a small town after all. Sunggyu heaved a sigh when he reached the parking lot of the clinic. He freed Haneul from the baby seat and carried the crying baby into the clinic.  
  
The nurse at the reception spotted them immediately. Since it was a small clinic, she recognized him pretty quickly. Haneul was also a familiar face in the clinic. “Oh my, Sunggyu-ssi, what’s wrong?”  
  
“I think he’s sick. He keeps pooping and he’s got a fever.”  
  
She took him from his arms and checked his temperature. “Too warm indeed. I’ll get the doctor. Please wait a moment.”  
  
Since there weren’t many other visitors, the doctor arrived pretty quickly. They shook hands shortly before he examined the baby. When he was done, he told Sunggyu that the baby had a bacterial infection. His heart stopped as the doctor said those words but the older man reassured him that Haneul would be fine. He just had to keep him hydrated at all times.  
  
“Just give him his bottle and if he rejects the formula, try giving him a pediatric electrolyte solution. I’m going to give you a prescription for some. You can get them in drugstores and they come in many flavors, so choose one that Haneul likes. The solutions are easier to keep down than formula. Have you started feeding him solids yet?”  
  
“No…I wasn’t sure if it wasn’t too early.”  
  
The doctor nodded. “You can start around the 5th or 6th month, but you should wait until he’s better. Maybe you can clean the bottles again or buy new ones. You should also check if the formula powder is still fine. If his fever doesn’t go down again or his symptoms get worse, please come again, but for now Haneul is fine. He is just very irritated, so he cries a lot. Keep him clean and hydrated and he will be better soon.”  
  
Sunggyu heaved a sigh and bowed shortly. “Thank you, doctor. I’m sorry for pestering you this late. I didn’t know what to do.”  
  
The older man smiled. “It’s okay. Taking care of a baby from one day to another is pretty hard. I’m glad that you offered to take care of him after his mother died. Never hesitate to ask if there is anything you are unsure about. Seungah was a very nice woman and I’d like for Haneul to grow up nicely.”  
  
He nodded and forced a short smile. Sunggyu picked up the dozing baby and bid the doctor farewell. The drive home was a lot more peaceful with Haneul sleeping in the back.  
  
Sunggyu parked his car in front of the building again and walked up the stairs with heavy steps. Just when he finally opened the door to the apartment, Haneul woke up again. He tried giving him the bottle and the baby at least drank a bit of formula before rejecting the rest of the food. It took him an hour until the boy fell asleep in his crib. The rest of the night was a mix of dozing off and waking up again with a jerk whenever Haneul started screaming at the top of his lungs. The boy never slept for long and Sunggyu was growing more tired and annoyed with every time he was ripped from his own slumber. He tried to handle Haneul with patience, though. It was his fault the boy was sick in the first place. At some point, he stopped trying to sleep and just waited for Haneul to wake up again.  
  
  
  
He awoke with a jolt. When had he fallen asleep? Sunggyu couldn’t remember but it was already bright outside and apparently, he had just slept on the rug in the nursery. He groaned because his body hurt from the rather uncomfortable sleeping place. He blinked and glanced at the crib. Haneul was sleeping peacefully and Sunggyu released the breath he had been holding. For how long had he slept? He wasn’t sure but his body and mind still felt exhausted from the long night.  
  
Sunggyu stood up to check Haneul’s temperature. The baby still seemed a little warm. He would need to feed him some milk again as soon as he was awake, which would probably not take very long. Suddenly, he heard a sound from outside the room. It sounded like someone was unlocking the front door. Sunggyu frowned. Maybe it wasn’t his door or he was just hallucinating. He walked out of the nursety and down the short corridor to check the front door.  
  
His eyes widened because the door was open and there was a guy standing in it, currently with his back to Sunggyu because he was about to close the door. “Hey! What do you think you’re doing?!”  
  
The stranger turned around with wide eyes. “W-Who are you?”  
  
“That’s my question! Get the fuck out of my apartment before I call the police! How did you open the door?”  
  
“I used my keys! And this is not your apartment!” The smaller, dark-haired man narrowed his eyes at him.  
  
“It is mine!” Sunggyu grabbed his arm and pushed the man out through the open door. “I don’t know who you are but you should leave or I’m seriously calling the police. Breaking into an apartment in the middle of the day, tsk!”  
  
He closed the door in the stranger’s face but then he remembered something. Sunggyu opened it again and ripped the keys from the still stunned man’s hands. He threw the door shut again and locked it. Protests got loud from the other side. “Hey! You can’t take my keys!”  
  
Sunggyu huffed and looked at the keys in his palm. A little tag caught his eyes. It read: “If you find these keys, please call me and return them to their rightful owner.”  
  
He snorted. “What is he? Five? Who puts a tag like that on their keys?”  
  
Sunggyu’s eyes widened when he read the name on the back of the tag. “Nam Woohyun?”  
  
The voice from the other side spoke up. “Open the door and give me back my keys! Where is Seungah?!”


	5. Fifth Bump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who is this mysterious Woohyun fella >:D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leave me kudos and comment please <3 hope you'll like the next chapter!!

His thoughts were racing. Of course there had been the possibility of this being a totally different Woohyun, but after that guy had uttered Seungah’s name like that there was little room for doubt left. Yet, he found it hard to grasp the reality in front of him. His eyes went back to the little tag on the key ring. How could he ever be able to forget that name? The name that had been a taboo for his family the past fourteen months. There were so many questions on his mind. So many things he wanted to say or do. Yet Sunggyu found himself unable to move from his spot.  
  
Another wave of angry knocks made him flinch. “I know you’re still there! Open the door, damn it! Give me my keys back!”  
  
Sunggyu’s fingers clenched around the key rings. He looked for the one that looked like a copy of his own key and took it off. He threw it on the cupboard nearby. With the anger still burning hot in his veins, he ripped the door open and threw the set of keys directly into the face of the surprised guy. A shout of pain was hurt as he slammed the door shut again. Sunggyu locked the door too, just to be safe. He could hear the other man groaning and cursing on the other side of the door.  
  
“Shit! Are you a psycho? That hurt!”  
  
He huffed. “Leave before I call the police!”  
  
Suddenly, Sunggyu noticed another sound he knew all too well. “Oh no…he woke up again.”  
  
He rushed back to the nursery with quick steps. The baby wailed in his crib with a red face. “Haneul-ah, don’t worry. Everything’s okay. The bad guy is leaving already.”  
  
Sunggyu picked him up careful and let the crying child rest against his chest. Haneul curled his tiny fingers around the fabric of his shirt but he didn’t stop wailing. He rocked him softly. “At least you can drink something now. We need to keep you hydrated.”  
  
He carried the baby boy out of the nursery. There was still some formula left from the previous time he had tried to feed Haneul. Sunggyu had cooled it properly to save it for later and now he just had to get it warm enough again for the boy to drink. His body temperature should do the job. “I hope you’re healthy again soon. You’re even louder than usual.”  
  
On his way to the kitchen, Sunggyu heard knocks from the direction of the door again. He glared at the wooden object. The temptation to shout at Woohyun was big, but that would only upset the baby further. “What is he doing here? I cannot deal with him right now.”  
  
“Hey, is that Haneul crying?” He heard the guy call from the other side of the door.  
  
Sunggyu stopped in his steps and frowned. He looked at his nephew who had momentarily stopped crying. “Why does he know your name?”  
  
Haneul didn’t reply, as expected. Another knock was heard. “Are you still there? Seungah? Please...even if you’ve got someone else...let me see him. I’m sorry. Let me explain.”  
  
He gritted his teeth. “And he thinks sorry is enough? No one wants to hear his explanation, right, Haneul-ah?”  
  
“ _Da_!” The baby exclaimed.  
  
Sunggyu nodded. “Glad we’re on the same page here.”  
  
“I’m not leaving before I can talk to you!” Woohyun shouted stubbornly.  
  
_Talk to her? It’s too late for that you insensible ass._ He bit down his anger and stomped into the little kitchen. Sunggyu grabbed the bottle with his free hand and clenched his fingers around it. Haneul immediately reached out his hands for it and he was glad to notice that change in his behavior. It seemed like the little rascal finally felt like drinking again – without being forced.  
  
“It’s pretty cold, Haneul. Wait a moment. I don’t want your stomach to get upset.”  
  
The little boy’s lower lip started to tremble and he started a rant of baby babbling. Sunggyu could imagine it would translate to something along the lines of “Give me the damn baby bottle or I’ll tear out your eyes”. Okay, maybe not the last part. He carried Haneul and the bottle back to the living room. Sunggyu sat down on the couch and put Haneul in the spot next to his. He knew better than to leave him out his eyes, though. Haneul had the tendency to try and fall down from things as much as possible.  
  
“Sit still for a second.” Sunggyu told the baby as he grabbed the remote of the TV. Maybe that would silence the knocks and shouts, should they start again.   
  
Haneul busied himself trying to get to the milk bottle in his left hand. He chuckled when the little one tried climbing onto his lap. “You are quite energetic for a sick kid.”  
  
He found the channel with the shows for children. “Oh look, Haneul, it’s your favorite, Poporo.”  
  
The little boy stopped crawling with his body bend over Sunggyu’s thigh and stared at the screen with big eyes. Sunggyu put the remote down again and sat Haneul properly onto his lap. The baby cooed and pointed at the TV. “Bo bo! Ah!”  
  
“Poporo, dear.” Sunggyu corrected him.  
  
He glanced at the closed door in his back. It was quiet on the other side and Sunggyu wondered if the guy had left. Hopefully he had, because Sunggyu would not hesitate to call the police otherwise. Why had that guy even come here? He should just leave again, just like he did over a year ago when Seungah had needed him the most.  
  
“A! Ba!”  
  
“No, he’s not your papa. He is a coward and a bad, bad person, Haneul.” Sunggyu corrected him.  
  
Little fingers touched his hand and he noticed that the boy had talked about the bottle and not Woohyun. Since the bottle had the right temperature now – at least from his perspective – he sat Haneul properly on his lap again and he brought the nipple to the baby’s lips. “Drink all you want.”  
  
Haneul ignored him and wrapped his tiny hands around the bottle before he sucked on the teat. Sunggyu watched in delight, though the smile quickly fell from his lips when Haneul stopped drinking a second later. The baby made a grimace and Sunggyu silently counted to three in his mind. Haneul wailed loudly and his face turned an angry shade of red. His hands pushed the tip of the bottle away and Sunggyu pursed his lips.  
  
“You were the one that wanted to eat it so badly. Is the temperature not okay?” He tested it shortly but everything seemed fine. Maybe he should make fresh formula after all…  
  
Sunggyu put the bottle away and stood up with Haneul in his arms. He rocked the baby gently as he made his way over to the nursery. “Or maybe you need those things that doctor prescribed you. What were they called again? Some kind of solution…he wrote the name down, thankfully. But I’d need to get it from the drugstore. I supposed you do not fancy a travel, Sir Cry-a-lot?”  
  
Haneul stopped crying suddenly and looked at his chest with a rather funny face. Sunggyu raised a brow. “So you want to go to the drugstore or- _DEAR GOD_ …what is this smell? You…you pooped! I didn’t know you make that face when you do that.”  
  
There were still so many things he didn’t know about the little boy. It was kind of frightening because Sunggyu felt like he was a bad guardian. He was a man who knew nothing about babies. How could he ever be enough to replace Seungah? It was impossible. She was irreplaceable in the first place, but Sunggyu could never take care of Haneul as she would’ve done.  
  
He quickly took off Haneul’s diaper in the bathroom since he would obviously need to be cleaned. Under the loud cries of the boy, Sunggyu disposed of the old diaper (the sight of so much poop in one place would never leave his memory) and cleaned him up, before bringing Haneul back to the nursery to put a new diaper on his clean butt. “Does it hurt, Haneul-ah? Don’t worry. You’ll be better soon. Let’s try to get you those solution things. The doctor said it will be better for your stomach.”  
  
Sunggyu put the boy in the crib and gave him his pacifier. Then he changed into proper clothes and looked for the note from the doctor, before clothing to the baby. “Let’s use the stroller today, hm? If I remember correctly, there is a drugstore just around the corner.”  
  
The blue stroller had been another present of his. When he looked at it, he could just remember Seungah’s reaction. How her surprise had turned into delight. How she had hugged him and whispered ‘thank you’ in his ear about a hundred times. There was a bit of dust on it that Sunggyu quickly swiped off. Had she not used it yet?  
  
“Haneul-ah, have you ridden the stroller before?” He asked the baby that was crawling around on the floor while sucking on his pacifier. Sunggyu gave the stroller another short glance before he shrugged. There was probably no difference between the buggy and the stroller. He didn’t see the buggy anyways and Haneul looked too big to still lie down in a baby buggy.  
  
He picked the baby up from the floor again and sat him into the stroller. He strapped the child down until he couldn’t climb out of it again or possibly fall. Haneul didn’t like this restriction at all and wailed again. Sunggyu huffed. “I have to take you with me. Don’t be like that.”  
  
Sunggyu pushed the stroller towards the door and unlocked it. “We’ll be back before you know it and then you can crawl around again – after drinking your stuff.”  
  
He opened the door and pushed the stroller out into the hallway, almost getting a heart attack when a voice said. “Haneul-ah!”  
  
His face darkened and he turned the stroller around, so that Woohyun couldn’t approach the baby. “What are you still doing here? Did you lurk here waiting for a chance to break in again?”  
  
Woohyun ignored him and kept trying to get to the front of the stroller to see the baby, while Sunggyu kept turning away and they turned in circles in the corridor for a while, until he pushed the stroller back into the apartment. He blocked the way and the slightly smaller man gave him a glare.  
  
“Let me see him!”  
  
“How about: no!”  
  
“I’m the father! Who are you to block my path? Does Seungah know you’ve put him into a stroller? He’s not old enough for one yet! It cannot support his back and head!” Woohyun shouted at him.  
  
Sunggyu flinched. Was that true? No, it couldn’t be. What would this useless fool know about taking care of a baby? “So now he is your son? You gave up on that right around fourteen months ago. Don’t make me punch your damn face and get out of my way!”  
  
Woohyun’s face darkened. “You know nothing about me! Let me talk to Seungah, you bony wimp! You probably punch like a girl-“  
  
Sunggyu punched him in the face before he could react. The brown-haired man stumbled backwards and touched his cheek. “Fuck!”  
  
“I guess if I hit like a girl, than you must be a sissy because I hurt you pretty good.” He commented smugly.  
  
“Damn you!” Woohyun roared and lunged at him.  
  
Sunggyu dodged the hit but he stumbled against the stroller. He was distracted for a moment when he wanted to check if Haneul was alright and Woohyun hit him right then. He fell to the side and against the cupboard. _Damn_ , that ass could throw punches. His jaw hurt like hell, not to mention his hips. Sunggyu was definitely not made for fist brawls.  
  
Woohyun gave him another push that sent him sprawling on the floor. The brown-haired man climbed over him quickly and walked over to the stroller to check on the crying baby. “Haneul-ah. Oh god you’re so beautiful…and so big…I’ve missed so much.”  
  
The older man thought he was going to barf (or maybe faint, because his head was ringing). He struggled to get back on his feet. “Get away from him!”  
  
“Leave me alone. I’m not here to fight you.”  
  
Sunggyu touched his jaw. “Really? I’m getting quite the different impression here.”  
  
Woohyun glared at him. “You provoked me first!”  
  
“No, you provoked me!”  
  
“No, you!”  
  
“You!”  
  
“You’re so annoying!”  
  
“That’s my line!”  
  
“Just let me talk to Seungah already! She’s here, isn’t she? I would’ve noticed had she left the apartment! Seungah! SEUNGAH!”  
  
“STOP SHOUTING!” Sunggyu snapped at him. He shoved Woohyun away from the stroller in a fit of rage. “She’s not here, you dumbwit! How dare you just appear here after more than a year and barge in like you own the place! You are the one who knows nothing! Fuck, why are people like you still alive and she’s…she’s…”  
  
He balled his fists. Sunggyu didn’t know if he was still shaking from rage or from the turmoil in his chest. Woohyun was quiet, finally. The only sound Sunggyu could hear was Haneul’s desperate wailing. He turned his back to Woohyun to crouch down and free the toddler from the stroller. He did look very unhappy in it. Maybe it really was only for bigger kids?  
  
The crying baby clung to him immediately and Sunggyu held him against his chest, patting the small back gently. “Sorry, Haneul, that was scary, I know. Stop crying, ssh.”  
  
He tried giving him the pacifier again but Haneul fiercely rejected it. He rather drooled on Sunggyu’s jacket instead. At least that muffled his cries a bit.  
  
“Seungah-…is she really…?” Woohyun asked behind him slowly.  
  
Sunggyu stood up and shot him a glare. “It’s none of your business anymore. You’re too late to ask for her forgiveness and I certainly don’t want to hear it!”  
  
“But how-“  
  
He snapped. “I don’t want to talk about it! Especially not with you! Get out of here. OUT!”  
  
Woohyun flinched and backed off shortly before walking past him with a lowered head. Sunggyu trembled in anger and sadness. He pressed Haneul stronger against his chest and fought the tears back. Why did people have to keep reminding him of his sister’s death? He hated remembering the accident which had taken his parents and Seungah, leaving him an orphan in this world. Him and Haneul both. Not to mention that it had to be Seungah’s ex-boyfriend and father of the crying boy in his arms asking that question. Of all people, that ass had to crawl to the threshold of his temporary home. Sunggyu had hoped that maybe it was another Woohyun but how many could she have possibly known? Right now, there was no doubt left anymore. He was Haneul’s father.  
  
He looked down at the baby, whose cries just seemed to get louder and louder. Sunggyu had a serious headache already and it wasn’t going to get any better like this. He didn’t really want to, but he had to keep going for Haneul’s sake. He had to buy the pediatric electrolyte solution because the boy seriously needed to drink something. The doctor had warned him sternly to keep the boy hydrated at all times.  
  
“Let me try and find the buggy.” Sunggyu said to the toddler and sat him down in the crib again to look for it in peace. He definitely didn’t do it because he believed Woohyun’s words! (He would check the truth behind that later.)  
  
The search went on for about 10 minutes before he gave up. “It’s not here…maybe it was in the car with them…”  
  
Sunggyu sighed and rubbed his temples. He decided to just carry Haneul around in his baby seat. It would be heavy but at least the baby would be strapped up safely. “Haneul-ah, let’s get going. This time we’ll really go to the drugstore.”  
  
He put Haneul in the baby seat and then walked towards the front door again. Sunggyu checked the hallway but there was no sign of Woohyun. He sighed in relief and closed the door behind himself. He locked it quickly and then hurried down the steps. Once they were outside, Haneul seemed momentarily distracted by all the things that he could see and switched crying for staring in awe. Sunggyu hoped that this would last until they reached the shop and back.  
  
“Seeing so many different people is exciting, huh?” He asked the baby boy, not that Haneul paid him any attention.  
  
Sunggyu wandered down the street, ignoring the weird looks some people gave him for carrying around the toddler in a baby seat obviously meant for a car. Did it look that weird? Maybe he should’ve used the stroller but ever since Woohyun had made that comment, Sunggyu didn’t want to use it anymore. He walked around the corner into the next street.  
  
“It should be around here…” He muttered as his gaze scanned the surroundings.  
  
Haneul started whimpering in his seat and Sunggyu gave him a shocked look. “Oh no…don’t cry again. We’ll be there in a second, I promise. I’m sure I saw one around here last time.”  
  
_Damn it. In Seoul I would’ve found ten already! This god forsaken little town is_ \- “There it is!”  
  
Sunggyu hurried over the street towards the shop. He seriously hoped those solutions would be better for Haneul than the formula. If he just kept pooping everything out that he drank, it would be an endless fight to keep him hydrated. Sunggyu entered the shop and was relieved to see that it was quite empty. _As expected of this town._ He walked around until he found a clerk. She showed him where the pediatric electrolyte solutions were and with her help Sunggyu bought a few that Haneul would hopefully like. He wasn’t sure at all what kind of flavors the toddler liked. It was great that they had a variety of different flavors in store, but Sunggyu just didn’t know Haneul’s favorites.  
  
“You better like one of those.” He threatened the baby when they left the shop.  
  
Sunggyu carried him back to the apartment and then prepared the solution for Haneul. He was beyond relieved when the baby drank everything. “I guess you like apple flavored things. That’s a start.”  
  
He still had to change the diaper afterwards but it was way better than the time before and Haneul seemed to be feeling much better afterwards. Sunggyu let him crawl around in the nursery while he sat down in a corner to eat his breakfast, always keeping an eye on him. Haneul seemed to particularly like playing with the little toy piano. Sunggyu watched him with a mix of amusement and cringing. Latter, because Haneul seemed to have not yet developed a sense for melody. He just hit the buttons with his tiny hands while lying sprawled out on his tummy. The result was like an insult to his ears but Sunggyu bore with it. After a while, Haneul went over to him with a curious smile on his face. Sunggyu put his plate out of the toddler’s reach and picked him up into his lap. “Hey sunshine, I’m glad you’re better now.”  
  
“ _Ba_!”  
  
“Better! Say it.” Haneul looked at him questioningly before letting out a high-pitched sound. He could only guess what it was supposed to be. Probably Haneul didn’t know either.  
  
Sunggyu tested the baby’s temperature quickly. Haneul still seemed a bit warm to him but he wasn’t hot anymore. “Should I give you another one of those solutions? Are you hungry?”  
  
“ _Kk_!”  
  
He raised a brow. “I wish I had a translator for all the weird sounds you make. I should read more about baby language I guess.”  
  
This was such an important phase of development for the child. Sunggyu was so afraid of doing something wrong, of missing an essential step and making Haneul fall behind the other kids his age. He lifted the boy up above him and Haneul smiled happily. Sunggyu leaned their foreheads together.  
  
“I hope I made the right decision with taking you in.”  
  
He stood up again with the toddler in his arms and carried him over to the kitchen to feed him another one of those solutions. Sunggyu chose the cherry flavor this time and Haneul seemed to be okay with that too. He didn’t drink it all but at least he fell asleep shortly afterwards. Sunggyu carefully put the sleeping boy into his crib and put a blanket over him, before sneaking out of the room. He sat down in the living room and took out his laptop to continue working on another project that Jungyeop had given to him. If only he could always work in peace like this…  
  
  
  
The next day, Haneul’s fever seemed to be gone. He cried less too and Sunggyu took it as a sign that the boy was almost healthy again. To be safe, he kept using the solutions for now instead of the formula. Haneul seemed to like them and a full baby was a tired baby. And a sleeping baby meant that Sunggyu could work in peace, at least theoretically speaking.  
  
  
  
He frowned when he heard a knock on the front door. (Sunggyu was beyond thankful that they hadn’t pressed the doorbell, because that would’ve woken Haneul up.) As he stopped in front of the door, a thought hit him. It couldn’t possibly be that guy again, right? Sunggyu stared at the wooden door but of course his eyes did not magically develop the ability to see through wood. He cleared his throat.  
  
“Who’s there?”  
  
There was a moment of silence before a voice replied. “Woohyun. Please, listen to me.”  
  
Sunggyu gritted his teeth. “I don’t know why I should. I told you Seungah isn’t-“  
  
“I know.” The man interrupted him. “I know…I…I went to the graveyard yesterday. I saw the graves. I’m…I’m sorry for your loss and for my behavior yesterday. I wasn’t thinking right. You’re Seungah’s brother right? She showed me a picture of you once but I was too worked up yesterday to notice. I came straight to the apartment from the airport. I was in a rush and…maybe in panic too.”  
  
“You know, I don’t care. You left my sister hanging when she needed you the most and now when she’s dead, you come crawling back here and want to see your son. If you wanted to acknowledge him, you should’ve done that 14 months ago when she told you about it! Maybe she would still be alive then! But no, you ignored her mailbox message and never answered her calls!” He shouted at the other. Sunggyu was glad that the door was between them this time. Talking about his sister always brought the tears to his eyes and he certainly didn’t want to shed a tear in front of that bastard.  
  
A sigh came from the other side of the door. “I didn’t leave her hanging, please, just listen. I didn’t know I was a father until a few days ago.”

Sunggyu snorted. “You want me to believe that?”  
  
“Just listen! When I got the job offer back then, I accepted it because Seungah seemed to be fine with it. She agreed with me when I proposed ending our relationship. We were always more friends than lovers anyways. I don’t know when she made that call you are talking about, but it must’ve been after I moved to the US. On my second day there, I forgot to lock my hotel room properly and I was robbed. My phone was gone along with most of my clothes and other belongings. I was pretty much left with what I had on me. I had to get a new phone and contract, so all my old data was gone. So even if she called me or dropped a message on my mailbox, I couldn’t get it. The police never found whoever robbed me.” Woohyun explained.  
  
He scoffed. “Are you perhaps writing novels in your free time? You got a lot of fantasy.”  
  
“You can ask my parents or my old workplace if you want. They will confirm the story.”  
  
_Old workplace? Is he not working in the US anymore?_ “Why did you never contact her? I’m sure you had a way to recover your old numbers. You never tried to contact her at all!”  
  
“You’re right. I managed to recover most numbers, including hers. It’s just that…I…I didn’t know what to say…or if she even wanted me to talk to her. But those are just excuses…I was busy to be honest. Too busy to think about anyone else. I had to adjust to a new culture, home and a job that suddenly didn’t seem all that great as before.”  
  
Was he telling the truth? Sunggyu wasn’t sure. He didn’t even know if it would change anything even if it were true. His sister was still gone and if only Woohyun had contacted her earlier, maybe this wouldn’t have happened. “Wait…how did you find out about Haneul then? Why are you suddenly back in Korea?”  
  
He heard rustling from the other side and then a letter was pushed through the little gap under the door. “Read it. It’s from Seungah. Apparently, she gave it to my parents and asked if they could forward it to me, since she didn’t have my new address. I got it three days ago.”  
  
Sunggyu picked the letter up with shaking fingers. When had she sent that letter? She had never told him about that. It must have been shortly before the day of the accident. He stared at the envelope and turned it around. There it was…the name of the sender: Kim Seungah. He put a hand over his mouth to muffle a sob. This was from Seungah. She should be here instead today and not Sunggyu.  
  
He sank down on the floor and opened the envelope slowly. Sunggyu unfolded the paper and he immediately recognized the curvy handwriting of his sister. It was real.  
  
_‘Dear Woohyun,  
  
You may feel bothered by my letter but I wanted to write you nevertheless. It is the only way left for me to contact you, since you are a stubborn fool and won’t use homepages like Facebook. If you do not wish to read this letter, please burn it. Don’t worry about me. I’m not waiting for a reply. This is not a letter asking for you to come back and assume responsibility already. I’ve come to terms with it, you know. I just thought that maybe I should share with you what has happened in our lives while you were gone. You’re still a part of it somehow if I want it or not.  
  
It’s been a little over a year since you went to America. Do you like it there? I guess so, since you don’t seem to miss Korea. I wonder if Haneul is going to be like you one day and go out into the big world to get famous, leaving his mother behind without a second look. Should he ever search for you, please treat him kindly and with an open heart. He is your son after all, even if you don’t want to acknowledge him.  
  
Ah, you are probably wondering why I named him Haneul, even though he’s a boy. It’s a name for both genders, isn’t it? I gave the baby the name before I knew the gender. I liked the meaning. Haneul like the sky. I read somewhere it can be interpreted as "spread your dreams high like the sky". Isn’t that romantic? Maybe he will feel burdened by the big meaning, but I want him to be free and reach whatever dreams he will have. I didn’t have the chance so I want Haneul to fulfill his dreams. That will make me happy enough.  
  
Haneul is currently 5 months old. You should see how fast he grows. It’s really fascinating and wonderful. In case you wonder, he has your eyes and nose. I’ve attached a few pictures to this letter. If you’re curious, you can look at them. Maybe it’s selfish of me, but I wanted you to know who your child is and what he looks like. Don’t feel like this is supposed to give you a bad conscience. Like I said, this letter is not telling you to return home and be a father. Continue your way, Woohyun. I won’t bother you again, at least if you want that. Should you change your mind, please contact me. A future together is probably impossible but I still wish Haneul would know his father too.  
  
If you’re wondering about me, I’m still the same old Seungah you left behind. Still living in that small, run-down apartment. It doesn’t look that bad anymore, though. I had some help from my guardian angel. Now the place looks much better and Haneul has a really beautiful nursery. He will grow up properly, don’t worry.  
  
Is there anything else left to say? I’m not sure. I wish I could end this with words like ‘I hate you’ and ‘I never want to see you again’, but it wouldn’t be the truth. I have tried to hate you and everyone believes I do, but I can’t do it. It’s kind of frustrating but you are the one that gave me my biggest joy. Haneul is the sun of my life and it’s all thanks to you that I got him. So instead of ‘I hate you’, I’m finishing this letter with: Thank you.  
  
Good bye, Woohyun. I hope one day you will find out what a joy a child is.  
__  
_ Sunggyu lowered the paper and covered his eyes with his free hand. After all Woohyun had done, Seungah had still not hated him. She had still sent him this letter to keep him informed of his child’s development. Why did a good person like her have to die? She would’ve deserved so many more years together with Haneul. She had deserved all the happiness in the world, yet everything had been cruelly taken from her in that accident. She would never know Woohyun’s half of the story – if it was true. Seungah died not knowing that he had gotten her letter and that he came back to Korea because of it.  
  
“Did you finish it?” Woohyun asked hesitantly.  
  
He didn’t reply since he didn’t trust his voice but the younger man continued anyways. “I was shocked when I read that letter. I hadn’t even known she was pregnant but suddenly I was the father of a 5 month old boy. My parents thought it might not be my child and that she may want to trick me, but they don’t know Seungah. I _know_ her. She wouldn’t lie about something like that. When the shock passed, I didn’t know what to feel. I only knew that I had to come here. I had to see Seungah and my son. I wanted to explain everything to her and I…I wanted to be a father for Haneul. I quit my job and all my things are coming back to Korea next week. I didn’t want to miss a day in his life anymore. I understand that it must be hard for you to take in, but I won’t give up and leave. Take some time to think about it. I just wanted to give you the letter for today. Please greet Haneul from me.”  
  
Sunggyu could hear Woohyun’s voice break. He took a shaky breath. He leaned his head back and tried to blink away the tears. What kind of joke was this? Was fate really that cruel? Of course everything coming from Woohyun’s mouth could be a lie, but what if it were true? Did he have a right to say no to Woohyun in that case?  
  
_He squeezed his eyes shut. Seungah…what should I do? Why are you not here to hear this instead of me?_


	6. Sixth Bump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> woogyu get closer....kind of. lol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i lag behind with releasing my chapters here haha >

Sunggyu sighed and read the letter in his hands for the nth-time. He hoped that everything would make more sense at some point. That maybe he would find some kind of clue on what he should do next. Some words between the lines that would tell him Seungah would  _never_  entrust her children to Woohyun. But there was none of that. She had even written Woohyun that she wanted him to be part of Haneul’s life, even if they could not marry and raise him like a normal couple. This was a mess. How was he supposed to decide which rights Woohyun had as Haneul’s father? He may even have more rights than Sunggyu. But the older man was not yet convinced that Woohyun had told the truth.  
  
“No, he’s lying. I  _know_  he’s lying! He must think I’m dumb and naïve like Seungah…but there surely is some hidden motive behind his words. Right, Haneul?”  
  
He looked over to the toddler who was playing around with his toys in the playpen. He was lying on his tummy like usually. Sunggyu had read that he would slowly learn how to sit at this age. It was hard to imagine that he had once gone through the same slow developments. That he had once not even been able to lift his head properly or even sit. Nowadays everything came naturally to him and Sunggyu thought how amazing it was.  _And,_  he understood once more how important this phase was. If Haneul didn’t learn everything now, things would not come to him naturally later.  
  
“Haneul-ah.” The boy looked up because he heard his name. At least that worked.  
  
The baby cooed. “Ba.”  
  
A sound that Haneul had been repeating for a while now. It was like a CD that was stuck at a certain point in the track. Apparently that was part of learning the human language. Listen and repeat. Sunggyu smiled shortly when the boy crawled towards the bars that enclosed the playpen. He stood up from the couch and crouched in front of him. “Ba!”  
  
Haneul looked at him. “Ba!”  
  
Sunggyu laughed. “Aren’t you going to say something else? What about ‘bo’? Bo!”  
  
“Ba!” The boy laughed and waved his hands in an adorable manner. Was this funny to him?  
  
“Bo!”  
  
“Ba!”  
  
“Ba-bo…I wonder which one of us is the idiot here.”  
  
“Ah!” Haneul stretched his tiny hands through the bars. When he noticed that he couldn’t get close to Sunggyu his eyes started to become teary and his face was becoming red.  
  
Those were all the signs he needed to put the letter away and lift the little boy out of the playpen. Haneul immediately calmed down again. “Did you miss your uncle? Don’t cry, Haneul-ah.”  
  
He sat down on the floor and placed Haneul in front of him. “You have to learn how to sit. You can’t crawl for the rest of your life.”  
  
Sunggyu pushed his legs into the form of a V. His book had said it was the best position to give him the necessary balance. Otherwise he’d just topple over. He supported Haneul with his hand and smiled down at the boy. “I’m starting to think like a real dad.”  
  
Talking about ‘real dad’ made Sunggyu remember Haneul’s biological father. What was he going to do about him? Hopefully, Woohyun would not stand at his doorstep again tomorrow. He needed time to think about this. Maybe he could somehow check if the other man’s story was true. But how was he supposed to check it? Sunggyu didn’t know which company Woohyun had worked for in America and his English wasn’t  _that_  good anyways. It wasn’t bad, but Sunggyu doubted he could hold a conversation with a fluent native speaker. They always spoke so fast and then he felt like an idiot when his reply was slower.  
  
“What do you think, Haneul? He’s a liar, right?”  
  
“Ba! Ba!”

“Great to know that we’re on the same side.” Sunggyu freely interpreted the baby’s speech.  
  
He grabbed a toy and started playing with Haneul for a while. It was a good distraction from all the problems he was facing and it kept the boy from crying. Eventually, he moved to the kitchen to make food for both of them and Haneul was tired enough to fall asleep after the meal. It seemed like his sickness was gone for good and Sunggyu was quite relieved. The fever didn’t come back that day and the diarrhea seemed to have disappeared as well, which meant that Sunggyu could grab a decent amount of sleep that night after having tired himself out throughout the day. Working on his project and playing with Haneul really had drained his energy.  
  
  
  
  
Things were calm for the next days. Woohyun didn’t ring his doorbell again or knock at the door. Not that Sunggyu was sad about it. He was glad to have some time to think about everything. He didn’t have an answer yet but if Woohyun’s story was true…then he might not have the right to keep Haneul away from him. Sunggyu only knew that he wasn’t going to give the custody over to the other man. Who was to say that he would not abandon Haneul like he did with Seungah, as soon as he got a better job opportunity somewhere? The best solution for all of his problems would be that Woohyun never comes back. That would be the best possible outcome. Sunggyu would be able to stop questioning things and just go back to hating the man again for being an awful human being. If things were going to continue like this, he would be able to back to that very soon.  
  
But his hopes were shattered soon enough. He met Woohyun again at the place he had expected last – the graveyard. Sunggyu had wanted to visit his family’s grave together with Haneul, who finally got to enjoy walks in a comfortable, new buggy. When he reached the grave, he found Woohyun on his knees in front of it, the head lowered as if he were asking for forgiveness. Sunggyu stopped in his tracks and observed him quietly. Woohyun didn’t move at all. Sometimes he lowered his head deeper before straightening his back again, but he never fully looked up.  _Maybe I should leave him be...I should come back later when he’s done._

Sunggyu turned the buggy around as quietly as possible and pushed it down the path again. Sadly, though, he did not get very far. “Sunggyu-ssi?”  
  
He stopped in his movement and cursed inwardly. Sunggyu took a deep breath before turning around. The other man was not kneeling anymore but standing upright. He frowned slightly when he noticed how disheveled the other man looked. Woohyun wasn’t shaved in the face, very different from when they first met face-to-face. His hair was unkempt and his eyes seemed puffy. They had dark circles beneath them too. He looked…terrible. Sunggyu was sure that, if they stood close enough, he’d be able to  _smell_  something unpleasant too.  
  
Woohyun gave him a tentative smile when he didn’t say anything. “I didn’t know you’d be visiting here today.”  
  
His gaze went to the buggy that was standing behind Sunggyu’s back. The older man cleared his throat to bring Woohyun’s attention back to himself. “I don’t think I need to tell you when I want to visit their graves.”  
  
The brown-haired man lowered his head. “That’s not how I meant it. I just…I know you don’t like to see me. I- Can I just…Can I just say hello to Haneul shortly?”  
  
 _If you do not want it to happen, let a lightning bolt hit him on the spot, Seungah._  Nothing happened and Sunggyu sighed. “Fine, but you better not try anything funny like kidnapping him. I’ll let you know I have a…a…black belt in boxing!”  
  
 _Wait…or was it karate that had belts?_  Woohyun chuckled and the older man felt the tip of his ears growing warm. “Just don’t do anything more than saying hello!”  
  
“I get it, I get it.” The brown-haired man spoke, the amusement still apparent in his voice. He came closer slowly and Sunggyu took a step to the side.  
  
Woohyun looked into the buggy and the older man thought that he saw true joy in his eyes. Haneul stared back at his father curiously and the man smiled widely. “Hello, little one. Do you remember me from last time? Probably not. I’m sorry if I scared you. I’d just like to know more about you-“  
  
Sunggyu cut in. “Stop brainwashing him! I said you can greet him, not tell him your lies.”  
  
Woohyun’s head snapped around to him and his glare made the older man flinch back shortly. “I’m not lying, damn it! What do I have to do for you to believe me?”  
  
“There’s nothing you can do! Even if I do believe you, it doesn’t change the fact that things could be different if you hadn’t left for America! My sister wouldn’t have needed to go through all of this alone! You know nothing of what she went through when she found out about the baby and had no one to turn to for help! She came all the way to Seoul to see me in the middle of the night because she was that desperate.” He poked Woohyun’s chest and the man stumbled backwards. “You don’t know shit about how hard life has been for her because you disappeared like that. While she struggled through the hardest year of her life, you didn’t even bother contacting her once! One call! One message! Was she not worth that much for you? I know your relationship wasn’t serious but she felt like she had been cast aside without a second thought! How could you do that to her when she let you go to America to achieve your so-called dream? Maybe my sister forgave you but I sure as hell will never do that!”  
  
He hadn’t meant to sound that mad or even say that much. Sunggyu had suddenly felt so much rage and then the words had just poured out of him. He knew it was wrong to blame Woohyun for his sister’s death. Even if he hadn’t left, the same thing might have happened. Seungah and Woohyun had both told him the relationship hadn’t been serious, so how could blame the other for breaking up because he got a job in another country? Maybe it wouldn’t have happened, had Sunggyu been in the car with them to drive. There were so many what ifs and he knew it was wrong to place all the blame on Woohyun, but younger man was  _here,_  in front of him. He was someone Sunggyu could actually blame.  
  
His words made Woohyun wince. “I’m sorry. I truly am. Had I known about the child...I would’ve never left. Since I found out about what happened with Haneul and...Seungah, there hasn’t been a night that I haven’t thought about what I could have done to prevent this. You’re right with everything but I- I want to make it up to Haneul now. Even if it’s late.”  
  
The brown-haired man started to cry and Sunggyu averted his gaze, feeling guilty and mean suddenly. Woohyun’s emotions seemed genuine. He not only looked like a broken man. He seemed to be broken inside as well. But all those words and apologies would not change a thing about his family’s death. “I have no intention of giving the custody of Haneul to you.”  
  
Woohyun smiled sadly. “I know. I will send you money, as I should as his biological father. All I want is to see him from time to time and that he grows up well, of course.”  
  
Sunggyu huffed. “I don’t need your money. As for seeing him...I can think about it but I won’t promise anything. Of course you could just go to a lawyer and claim your right as his parent by force. I won’t go down without a fight, though.”  
  
He crossed his arms stubbornly and Woohyun wiped his eyes. The other man smiled shortly. “I won’t get a lawyer. Seungah, she...she chose well when she gave the custody to you. I can see that you care for him and will protect him well. I won’t take him from you by force.”  
  
That was not the reply he had expected. Sunggyu had been ready to take this argument to court, though he feared of what his chance would be against the biological father. It wasn’t like Woohyun was someone jobless drunk that had abused his sister or anyone else. Though, he probably was jobless right now. Sunggyu felt a little lost for words since Woohyun had taken him by surprise with the unexpected reply - and flattery.  
  
“O-Okay...” He said awkwardly. Sunggyu wasn’t sure if he could trust the other or if Woohyun would betray him as soon as he lowered his defenses.  
  
“Maybe I should...” Woohyun pointed behind himself.  
  
“Yeah.” He really needed some time to think about all of this.  _Why did you appear again? I thought you stopped faking how much you care for your son. Aish, he just makes things more complicated every time he appears._  
  
Woohyun nodded to himself and turned around to wave Haneul goodbye. “I will see you soon, I hope. Be good, okay?”  
  
The baby cooed and stretched out his tiny hands. Sunggyu pursed his lips in dislike, but when Woohyun hesitantly reached out to touch Haneul’s hand, he didn’t interfere. It looked like such a tender moment and Sunggyu couldn’t bear to break it. Woohyun pulled his hand back again and then started walking off with his head hanging low.  
  
He turned his gaze away and looked at Haneul. “Traitor.”  
  
The boy just squealed happily. “Ba!”  
  
“Ba indeed.” Sunggyu muttered. He pushed the buggy around again and headed back towards the grave.  
  
He took the old flower bouquet and replaced it with the new one he had bought before coming here. It was still unbelievable – the fact that his whole family was resting to his feet. Their bodies were burned to ashes. Sunggyu felt strangely empty now when he looked at the family grave. It was true what they said: you don’t know what you have until it’s gone. He thought he would cry every time he saw the grave, but instead, an emptiness had settled inside his chest. An emptiness that was much more painful than falling to your knees and breaking out into tears. It ate him up from the inside, silently like poison. He didn’t cry but that didn’t mean he wasn’t hurting.  
  
Sunggyu glanced at the baby. “I wish I were you sometimes. No thoughts in my head except for sleep, food and poop.”  
  
Haneul cooed. “Pu!”  
  
“Another sound learned. Your speed is amazing.” He remarked with an amused smile. “There’s no need for your first full word to be poop, though. Seungah would have my head.”  
  
His attention was torn away when he heard the sound of a siren. It sounded like an ambulance and it was pretty close. Sunggyu furrowed his brows. Haneul suddenly started to cry and he looked at the boy. His crying turned into loud wailing, quickly reaching the sound level of screaming. He wondered if Haneul recognized the sound. Did he remember the accident and the sound that he had heard before his mother left his side forever?  
  
“ _Ssh_ , the ambulance will be gone in a second.” Sunggyu got him out of the buggy and held the small boy to his chest.  
  
The siren went mute but Haneul didn’t stop wailing. He patted the baby’s back gently. “There, there. It’s gone now. Everything’s alright.”  
  
Sunggyu looked at the grave. “I’m sorry, Seungah, mum and dad, I have to cut the visit short today. He’s quite upset so I should probably take him home. I’ll come see you another day.”  
  
He placed the boy back in the buggy and gave him his pacifier, though Haneul had nothing of that. He seemed really upset and Sunggyu figured that the sound must really be traumatizing for him. He would have to ask the doctor if Haneul was even able to remember details of the accident or not. Sunggyu pushed the buggy down the path again with quicker steps this time. He was in a hurry to get Haneul home. He could be hungry too or maybe he pooped into his diaper – Sunggyu was never able to tell what was wrong instinctively. He wondered how mothers were able to guess those things correctly.  
  
As he headed out of the graveyard, Sunggyu frowned when he saw the ambulance right in front of it. Two paramedics were crouching on the ground, caring for some person that was lying down. Other people stood around them, whispering to each other as they observed the scene. He was about to just pass by without staring at the scene when he noticed that the clothes seemed awfully familiar.  
  
Sunggyu’s eyes widened and he rolled the buggy towards the scene. “Woohyun?!”  
  
The other man seemed to be unconscious but one of the paramedics looked up. “Do you know this man?”  
  
“He’s, well- I mean, yes. What happened?”  
  
“Someone found him passed out here and called an ambulance. I can’t make a definite diagnosis on the spot, but I’d say he hasn’t slept, drunk or eaten enough. Maybe everything.” The paramedic told him.  
  
“Oh.” That was the only thing he managed to say. Sunggyu didn’t know what to say or do. Was it too late to turn around and act like nothing happened? Probably.  
  
“We’ll take him to the hospital for now. The doctor can check on him.”  
  
The second paramedic looked at him. “Would you come to the hospital with us?”  
  
“I-uh- the buggy-“  
  
“It can fit into the ambulance, don’t worry. It would be good if someone who knows the patient is present. It will save us a lot of time.”  
  
“Oh, I don’t really-“ Sunggyu saw the people around them looking at him and whispering to each other. He could almost hear their judging words. For them, he was someone who obvious knew the person lying on the ground but wasn’t bothering to help the unconscious man. Damn little town and those people that cared about every little thing.  
  
“Okay. I’ll come with you.” He agreed reluctantly.  
  
  
  
About ten minutes later, Sunggyu found himself in the hospital, sitting on an uncomfortable chair in a corridor. Haneul was – thankfully – finally sleeping after a nurse had helped him out with food and a fresh diaper. The doctor had checked on Woohyun already and found out that the man’s immune system had collapsed, just like the paramedic had guessed. Woohyun had not slept and eaten enough, so his body had finally shut down when it was no longer able to function properly. The doctor had asked him if Woohyun was perhaps living on the streets, because of the state he was in. Sunggyu didn’t know the answer to that but surely the younger man had some kind of hotel room or apartment here? And he should have enough money to eat too. Maybe the sorrow over Seungah’s death had reduced him to this state?  
  
Theoretically, Sunggyu could just leave now. There was no need to feel obligated to wait until Woohyun woke up. They weren’t friends after all. But his body wasn’t moving. He just kept waiting in his uncomfortable seat and worrying about why Woohyun was in such a state. No matter how much he had screamed and cursed at the other, Sunggyu did not wish for him to fall dead on the street.  
  
In the end, it took Woohyun three hours to wake up. Three precious hours during which Sunggyu could’ve done a lot for his job, but no, he had just sat around uselessly waiting for a guy he didn’t like to wake up. After the doctor checked on his patient, Sunggyu was allowed to go into the room. Woohyun seemed surprised when he entered the room with Haneul in his arms. The toddler was peacefully sucking on his pacifier. “Sunggyu-ssi?”  
  
“That’s my name.” He replied matter-of-factly.  
  
Woohyun’s eyes went to the baby. “Haneul-ah...you shouldn’t see me like this.”  
  
Sunggyu raised an eyebrow. “Should I put him back into his buggy? If you don’t want-“  
  
“No! No, please, let him stay. Can I...Can I hold him?”  
  
He snorted. “No way. You don’t look strong enough to hold a piece of paper. I’m not entrusting a child to you. Which by the way brings me to the question – what happened to you? Is it...because of Seungah?”  
  
Woohyun grimaced. “No...yes, maybe partly. I had a cold recently maybe that weakened me more than I expected.”  
  
Sunggyu narrowed his eyes at him and then turned to leave. “If you have nothing but lies for me, I’m leaving.”  
  
“No! Don’t go.” The other man shouted and then broke out into a coughing fit.  
  
He stepped closer and handed the glass of water from the bedside table to Woohyun. “If you ever want me to trust you, you should start by not treating me like a fool.”  
  
Woohyun drank the water greedily and rested the glass in his lap. He smiled shortly. “I’m sorry. It’s just...I don’t want to bother you with my problems. You hate me anyways. Why would you care?”  
  
 _Yeah...why exactly, Kim Sunggyu? What are you doing here?_  He sat down on the chair nearby and settled Haneul on his lap. The boy kept looking over to Woohyun and wanting to crawl to him, but Sunggyu didn’t let the toddler out of his hold. “When you collapse on the path I walk down, it becomes my business. You were lying in my way and I couldn’t get past. Plus you made Haneul all upset. I don’t want to find your corpse next time. It would be...inconvenient.”  
  
Woohyun laughed shortly. “I can’t tell if you care or not,  _ha ha_. I’m sorry for fainting like that. Actually, I…I was thrown out of my hotel room two days ago.”  
  
Sunggyu furrowed his brow. “Thrown out? What did you do?”  
  
“Rather, what did I not do? I was out of cash and my credit card didn’t work. I don’t have a bank account here yet because my bank in the US is pretty slow. Or maybe they just don’t want to let go of my money, I don’t know. But I couldn’t pay anymore, so…yeah.”  
  
He sighed. How unlucky could one guy be? In America his hotel room gets broken in and he loses his stuff, in Korea he gets thrown out for having no money. He didn’t know if the first part was true but maybe it was. Maybe Nam Woohyun was a terribly unlucky guy.  
  
“Where did you stay for the last two days then?” Sunggyu asked anxiously, already fearing the answer.  
  
The brown-haired man shrugged. “In a park. I put my suitcase in a locker at the main station for the time being. I had at least enough money for that.”  
  
So he didn’t just look like he slept on the streets. He  _had_  slept on the streets. “So for two days you slept in a place without cover where anyone could’ve robbed and killed you, while probably eating nothing at all, instead of…I don’t know…asking your parents for help?”  
  
Woohyun rubbed the back of his neck with a troubled expression. He didn’t reply to Sunggyu’s question and the older man started to get irritated. “Spit it out!”  
  
“My parents kicked me out too. They won’t support me if I accept Haneul as my son, which I’m definitely going to do. I’m not going to act like he’s no one to me. They didn’t take news of their perfect son fathering a child outside a marriage well.”  
  
Sunggyu groaned. “You’re kidding me!”  
  
Woohyun seemed offended. “Yes, I’m joking about being abandoned by the people I thought would always support me! I’m of course joking about being penniless in this country without a friend or a home. I’m perfectly fine so don’t you worry about me! Not like you ever would. Are you here to mock me?”  
  
He grimaced. “That’s not what I’m here for…I was-“  
  
 _What? What are you going to say? Worried?_  Sunggyu cleared his throat. “I don’t like you but that doesn’t mean you’re allowed to die. Haneul has already lost his mother. A useless shit like you isn’t allowed to leave cowardly like that. You said you’d care for him, didn’t you?”  
  
The younger man blinked. “You really have a skill of making care sound like an insult.”  
  
He huffed. “Let’s go then. The doctor said you can leave if you want.”  
  
“Go? Where are  _we_  going?”  
  
Sunggyu attempted to speak but was interrupted by a burp from Haneul. The baby laughed in delight and he smiled shortly. “We’re going to the bank to see if your story is true.”  
  
“And then?” Woohyun asked anxiously.  
  
“Then we are getting your bag and finding you a place to sleep. I don’t want to lie awake in bed tonight, wondering if your corpse is rotting away in some dark alley.”  
  
Really. That was everything. He didn’t  _care_  for Woohyun or  _worry_  about him. Sunggyu just didn’t want to feel responsible should he die because he had no money for a roof over his head or food. That guy should suffer for many more years for the mistakes he did! He didn’t care more about Woohyun than people usually cared when they saw a stranger in need. Right. He pitied Woohyun. No more than that.  
  
  
  
  
They ate something before they went to the bank, since Woohyun was still malnourished. (Sunggyu only bought him food because the rambling of the younger man’s stomach was so loud and annoying.) The assistant at the bank told him the same thing Woohyun had said: he could not withdraw any money because the bank was still waiting for the American bank to react. There was nothing they could do but wait. Since Woohyun’s credit card wasn’t working either, they could not withdraw money at any ATM either. It was really annoying! Sunggyu wanted to grab someone and strangle them to death. Preferably Woohyun. But that would make the efforts of the last hours totally useless.  
  
“This is unbelievable!” Sunggyu exclaimed as they left the bank.  
  
Woohyun smiled shortly. “You don’t need to feel obligated to help me. Why don’t you go home now? Haneul should sleep in a proper bed.”  
  
“I don’t feel obligated! And I’m not helping you! I’m just…checking to see if you’re lying.”  
  
“So now you believe me?”  
  
“If this were Seoul, you’d have your money by now.  Did you even cancel your contract in the US properly?” Sunggyu narrowed his eyes at him.  
  
The brown-haired man sighed. “I left the country on short notice. I only managed to write an e-mail when I landed in Seoul.”  
  
“Well, they are not magicians. Normally people plan this kind of stuff weeks ahead of time and talk about it with the bank.”  
  
Woohyun sighed. “I know…I didn’t think straight after reading the letter, you know. I’ll try to find a solution, so don’t lose any sleep over it. You hate me, did you forget that?”  
  
Sunggyu huffed. Woohyun turned away. “I won’t collapse anywhere again if you’re worried about me blocking your path again.”  
  
“Where will you stay?” He called after the man.  
  
Woohyun didn’t turn around and just waved his hand. “I’ll try to find some dark alley where no one will try to rob or kill me in my sleep.”  
  
He pursed his lips as he watched the retreating back of the other. Woohyun’s words only made him worry more and he wondered if the younger man might have chosen to phrase it that way on purpose. Maybe he wanted Sunggyu to have pity on him and invite him to sleep over at their home. What a clever trap, but he would not fall for it!  
  
“Right, Haneul-ah?” He looked down at the boy and Haneul looked right back at him with a quivering bottom lip. His eyes widened. “No, Haneul! We won’t fall for his bait!”  
  
The toddler met his gaze with glistening eyes and his face was becoming redder with every second that passed. Sunggyu could see he was going to cry any second if he didn’t- “ _Ah_ , fine!  _Yah_ , Woohyun!”  
  
The brown-haired man heard his shout and turned around. “Yes?”  
  
“You can sleep on the couch for tonight but if you do anything funny-“  
  
Woohyun broke out into a grin and walked back towards him. “Thank you, hyung!”  
  
“ _Hyung_?! Don’t get too comfortable with me.” Sunggyu muttered.  He turned the buggy around to head back home.  _I’m just helping him because of Haneul! I’m not falling for his acting!_  
  
Haneul squealed. “Ba!”  
  
He narrowed his eyes at the toddler. “This is all your fault.”


	7. Seventh Bump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Woohyun moves in~ /le gasp

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they are still fighting a lot but we are getting there!! be patient with me uwu

 

Sunggyu opened the door to his apartment and pushed the buggy down the corridor. How had things ended up this way with Woohyun sleeping over at his apartment? They barely even knew each other. Not to mention that the only thing connecting them was hatred! Yes, definitely nothing more than hatred! He took off his shoes and carefully lifted Haneul out of the buggy afterwards. The little rascal had fallen asleep on their way home and Sunggyu wanted to keep it that way. He would feed Haneul when he woke up. For now, he needed some peace. The day had totally not gone as he had planned. Everything because of one person: Nam Woohyun. He glanced over his shoulder to see the younger man in the door frame.  
  
“The nursery looks really nice.” Woohyun commented in a quiet voice.  
  
He pulled the blanket over Haneul’s body and turned towards the other man. “Seungah wanted it to be perfect. She really put a lot of thought into this room.”  
  
Woohyun nodded with a distant expression. “I can see that.”  
  
Sunggyu left the room and the younger man followed him. They moved to the living room and then stood there awkwardly. The older man didn’t know what to say or do. He really needed to work on his project but could he ignore Woohyun like that? But they hated each other, so surely that was okay? Could he work while Woohyun was there, though?  
  
“Do you…want something to drink?”  
  
“Sure. Water is fine.” Woohyun sat down in the armchair awkwardly and the older man slipped away to the kitchen. He was quite thankful to escape the awkwardness for at least a short moment.  
  
He grabbed two glasses from the cupboard and filled some water in them. Sunggyu brought them back to the living room and gave Woohyun one. He sat down on the couch, furthest from Woohyun. The younger man looked at him. “Do you think I could…use your laptop for a moment?”  
  
Sunggyu looked at the device lying on the tabletop and back to the other man. “Why?”  
  
“Well…I could check my mails and see if the bank has replied.”  
  
He sighed shortly but nodded. “But only for a moment. I really need to get back to work.”  
  
Sunggyu opened the laptop and typed in his password. He clicked the icon for the browser and handed it over to Woohyun. “What do you work as, hyung?”  
  
He raised his chin all too slightly. “I’m an architect. I design buildings, mainly in Seoul and the surrounding area, but I recently did a project for a hall in Busan. It will hold a lot of big events in the future.”  
  
“That’s-  _uh_ \- nice.”  
  
He squinted. “What about you?”  
  
Woohyun cleared his throat shortly. “I’m a doctor. A surgeon to be exact. I worked at the New York-Presbyterian Hospital, but that probably doesn’t tell you anything.”  
  
“No, but the way you say it makes the hospital sound like a really famous place for snobby doctors from all over the world.” The older man gave back.  
  
“It is the biggest hospital in the US and it was an honor to work there!”  
  
“It should be, since you left my sister for that job.” Sunggyu replied bitterly.  
  
Woohyun glared at him. “If you are going to be like this, I’ll prefer sleeping in an alley. I said I’m sorry but you keep acting like I didn’t say anything at all. It was an important opportunity for my career and Seungah agreed that I should go. We didn’t love each other. We were only friends having casual sex. We were together but not really committed. On mutual agreement. Had I known she were pregnant, I wouldn’t have left or come back immediately. I may have not loved her like a true lover, but Seungah was still a very good friend of mine. What would you do if you didn’t have a lover and your dream place offered you a job? You’d go!”  
  
The younger man pinned his gaze back to the screen and angrily typed something. Sunggyu bit down a comment about how he shouldn’t break his keyboard. Could he really say anything about Woohyun leaving for a good job opportunity? Back when his dream college had accepted him, he had abandoned his family too and never returned because of the job he got right after college. He had chased after his career and left his family behind. He knew Woohyun was saying the truth about it not being a serious relationship in the past. Seungah had told him the same. Sunggyu still found it hard to let go of his anger, though. He sipped his water as Woohyun typed around on his laptop.  
  
The way the younger man’s face darkened, Sunggyu figured there was no reply yet. His finger angrily slammed into the keys again and Sunggyu frowned. “I know you are mad at your bank, but could you not abuse my laptop like that? I still need it the next few days.”  
  
Woohyun frowned at him. “Why only a few days?”  
  
He shrugged. “Because I’ll be traveling back to Seoul soon, obviously. I got my computer there and also the one at work.”  
  
“What about Haneul?”  
  
Sunggyu blinked at the brown-haired man. “He’ll come with me of course.”  
  
“And Seungah’s apartment?”  
  
He sighed and leaned his head back. “I guess I will have to sell it. Or just rent it to somebody. I can’t stay here. I got a job in Seoul, though I need a new apartment because of Haneul.”  
  
“Will you work from home or who is going to take care of him?” Woohyun continued to question him.  
  
Sunggyu huffed. He was starting to get annoyed. “I can’t work from home forever. I need to be in the office. I will get a baby sitter for Haneul. Stop asking me so many things, geez.”  
  
“But he’s in a delicate development phase! He needs proper care and education! You can’t just let  _anyone_  take care of him!” Woohyun closed the laptop and put it away. “He needs to bond to somebody and get used to that person! Learn how to speak and behave! I’m sure Seungah didn’t entrust him to you, so a stranger ends up taking care of him most of the day!”  
  
Sunggyu glared at him. “I got a job! I can’t just ditch that or Haneul will have to pay his school fees alone in the future because I will be penniless! And don’t  _you_  tell me what my sister would’ve wanted! I will find someone trustworthy who can do the job. Don’t you worry. Haneul is my responsibility.”  
  
Woohyun stood up with clenched fist and the older man tensed his muscles. “W-What? Are you going to punch me again?”  
  
The brown-haired man suddenly bent his back and bowed deeply. “Please let me take care of Haneul then! I want to do something for him and-“  
  
Sunggyu rolled his eyes. “And I can trust you? I hope that’s not what you wanted to say.”  
  
Woohyun stayed in position. “I will do anything to gain your trust! Please! Nothing would make me happier than this! I’m not going to fight you for the custody, but I’d love to be a part of Haneul’s life. I’m…his father after all.”  
  
He narrowed his eyes at the other man. Sunggyu was tempted to just throw the words back in his face and reject his suggestions, but something made him hesitate. Maybe it was the fact that Woohyun seemed so genuinely desperate to spend time with his son in the future. And maybe the man was right with his words. He would not be a total stranger to Haneul. Though, in some sense, he  _was_  a stranger for the baby. Sunggyu still didn’t have any answer to the question if he could deny Woohyun his right as a father. What if Woohyun become the babysitter and turned out to be a better dad than Sunggyu? He would bond more with Haneul, since they would spent more time together. What if Woohyun then suddenly decided to take Haneul away from him because Sunggyu wasn’t needed anymore? The thought of losing the toddler seemed so painful. Sure, he was a handful and making his life very difficult right now, but he still liked the little guy and Seungah had trusted him with her son.  
  
Everything would be so much easier to decide if the younger man were a total ass.  
  
“Do you even know anything about babies?”  
  
Woohyun straightened up again. “Of course! I used to babysit in high school and I’ve been reading up on how to raise a toddler. I was…well…I wanted to help Seungah with raising Haneul when I came here.”  
  
Sunggyu squinted. “ _Hmh_.”  
  
The younger man sighed. “You can ask me anything you want! I’ll know the answer!”  
  
He pursed his lips. “I’ll think of questions, maybe, but we’re not doing that today. I’m busy and all of this has given me a headache. I’m glad to have a little break with Haneul sleeping peacefully. Why don’t you go and take a shower first? You reek pretty badly.”  
  
Woohyun had the audacity to grin at him. “Thank you for caring about my health, hyung.”  
  
“I’m not caring about your health!”  
  
“Of course~” The younger man singsonged and walked away to get his bag. They had grabbed it from the station before returning to Sunggyu’s apartment.  
  
“Stupid brat.” Sunggyu muttered as the other man disappeared into the bathroom. He just didn’t want the armchair to smell like a dead cat!  
  
While Woohyun showered, the older man tried working on his project. He kept his laptop closed and instead drew around in his sketchbook. Sunggyu still wasn’t sure about the final design for the place. He just wanted to have as many designs as possible done before he returned to the office. It wasn’t always easy to draw detailed buildings when you had to take care of a toddler, though.  
  
He wasn’t sure how much time had passed when Woohyun finally left the bathroom again. Sunggyu immediately dropped his pen and closed his sketchbook. His bladder had been shouting at him for a while and  _finally_  he could follow the call of nature. He was stunned for a moment when he saw Woohyun. The man hadn’t only showered and changed his clothes. He had also shaved his face and tamed his wild locks with a comb. It was painfully obvious again how handsome the other man was. Sunggyu shook his head quickly and resisted the urge to slap himself. Woohyun wasn’t handsome! He was an asshole! Yes! And his sister’s ex-boyfriend, who had ditched her with the baby that was now sleeping in the nursery down the corridor. He tore his gaze away and cleared his throat.  
  
“Don’t take so long next time. Other people need the bathroom too.” Sunggyu walked into the bathroom – not without not so gently shoving Woohyun aside with his shoulder. “Out of my way!”  
  
The younger man huffed. “You could’ve just kindly asked…asshole.”  
  
The last word was nothing but a low whisper but Sunggyu’s sharp ears caught it nevertheless. He narrowed his eyes at Woohyun and pointed at him. “Do you want to repeat that? But from the other side of my apartment door this time.”  
  
“My great life savior, have a happy toilet visit.” Woohyun replied sarcastically.  
  
Sunggyu huffed. “I’m going to take a shower too. Don’t touch any of my things.”  
  
He closed the door but he could hear Woohyun shout. “I shall watch TV then because it isn’t yours.”  
  
The older man swallowed down an angry reply and locked the bathroom instead. Sunggyu hadn’t planned to take a shower originally, but now he really thought he could use a cold one. Damn Woohyun and his handsome looks! He could hardly deny that the man was handsome. Seungah and he had always had a similar taste in men, but Sunggyu would not fall for a man with a personality like that! He was rude and…disrespectful! He had slept with his sister and gotten her pregnant! Even if they had only had a casual relationship as girlfriend and boyfriend, he should have been careful not to impregnate her!  
  
Sunggyu took off his clothes and stepped under the shower. The cold water made him flinch shortly but it was strong enough to wake him up. He needed to keep his head clear. He could not lower his defenses and risk Woohyun worming his way inside his head. The older man suddenly felt reminded of Woohyun bowing deeply as he asked to be Haneul’s babysitter. Sunggyu shook his head stubbornly and pushed his wet fringe back. No. He had to be firm and keep Woohyun on a distance. A part of him was afraid that he’d get charmed by the younger man, just like Seungah, and end up making the same mistake.  
  
  
  
  
After he was finished and dressed again, Sunggyu left the bathroom with his hair only dried half-heartedly. The TV was running in the living room but Woohyun wasn’t there. He blinked in confusion but then he heard noises from the nursery. The older man frowned in irritation and stomped down the corridor, reading to shout at Woohyun for bothering Haneul in his sleep. He didn’t expect to see Woohyun with the baby in his arms, feeding the little boy with a fond expression. The younger man rocked him gently as Haneul devoured his dinner eagerly.  
  
Sunggyu stood still in the doorframe and watched them. The two of them were looking at each other as Haneul fed. Woohyun kept cheering him on. “You’re doing well, Haneul-ah.” – “Look at your cute little cheeks. Full of food!” – “Do you like it? Does it taste good? Daddy also likes strawberry a lot.”  
  
He snapped out of his trance at the word ‘daddy’. Sunggyu entered the room and immediately went over to them to take Haneul out of the other man’s arms. Woohyun didn’t struggle but shot him a frown. “You have no right to call yourself his father! Don’t just touch him without permission.”  
  
Sunggyu took the bottle as well and continued feeding the toddler. Haneul didn’t seem to care about the change. He was happy as long as someone fed him. Woohyun was observing him sharply and the older man turned his back to him, starting to feel uncomfortable under his gaze. “He started crying while you were showering. I didn’t know how long you’d take so I fed him. And I hate to remind you but I  _am_  Haneul’s father. More than you will ever be.”  
  
The brown-haired man stormed out of the nursery with anger – and possibly hurt? – in his eyes. Sunggyu pursed his lips. So what if he would never be Haneul’s father? He knew that! Sunggyu was his uncle and he would never force the boy to see him as his father. Woohyun’s words still stung nevertheless. He looked down at Haneul who was already finished with his portion of strawberry solution. He patted the boys back gently and the boy burped. “Da!”  
  
“He’s not your da, Haneul! Don’t let him wrap you around a finger just because he fed you. You like people too easily.”  
  
The baby just looked at him with his adorably clueless face. Sunggyu sighed. “I suppose you don’t want to sleep now?”  
  
Haneul cooed and clapped his hands cutely. “Yeah, thought so. Should I read you a story? I don’t feel like going back to the living room right now.”  
  
Going there would mean facing Woohyun. He didn’t feel like doing that right now.  
  
Sunggyu kept Haneul in his arm and walked towards the still relatively empty bookshelf. While he picked out a book, the toddler busied himself with trying to grab the ends of the man’s hair with his tiny fingers. His arms weren’t long enough, though. Thank goodness. Sunggyu chose a book and settled down in the armchair with Haneul in his lap. He opened the picture book and the colorful pages immediately fascinated the boy. Sunggyu watched in fond amusement as the little hands swiped over the page, trying to touch the things he saw.  
  
Haneul hit his hand on the spot where a frog was sitting. “Ba!”  
  
“No, that’s a frog.”  
  
He spent the next few minutes telling Haneul the name of things. The boy was very eager and demanding, but Sunggyu figured it was good that he was so curious. Haneul needed to learn how to speak. Learning words was a good start for that. Every time he was done reading the text on the page to the toddler, they would go to the next page and Sunggyu would once again spent a few minutes simply telling Haneul words he was curious about. Although he often complained how the boy kept him from working, moments like these really filled his heart with warmth and love. Teaching Haneul things was fun and it made him feel like he was actually achieving something.  
  
Halfway through the picture book, the toddler started dozing off. Sunggyu noticed how he didn’t point at things anymore and instead leaned back against his stomach. He smiled and closed the book again. The man put it on the shelf nearby and carefully lifted Haneul up. “Sleep in your bed. I’m not as comfortable as that.”  
  
The baby mumbled something incomprehensible in his baby language and yawned. Sunggyu carefully put him into the crib and wrapped the fluffy blanket around him. Haneul blinked tiredly. He stroked the soft hair with a smile. “Sleep well.”  
  
Sunggyu pulled back and slowly walked out of the room. He turned the light off and headed down the short corridor towards the living room. Woohyun looked up when he entered the room. “Is he sleeping?”  
  
“Yeah…”  
  
They looked at each other awkwardly. Sunggyu heard his stomach grumble and he cleared his throat. “Should we eat dinner too?”  
  
“Well, if you want I can cook for us. I just didn’t know if I’m allowed to use your kitchen or not.” Woohyun suggested.  
  
He raised an eyebrow. “ _Can_  you cook?”  
  
Woohyun smiled weakly. “Seungah used to praise my cooking a lot.”  
  
They moved to the kitchen and the younger man started checking his fridge. Sunggyu stayed nearby to keep an eye on him. Woohyun snorted after a moment. “You don’t cook a lot, do you? There’s barely anything in here.”  
  
Sunggyu pursed his lips. “I didn’t have time to buy groceries.”  
  
Okay, it was a weak excuse. He was a terrible cook and Sunggyu preferred quick meals that just needed some hot water to succeed. Woohyun grunted as he gathered whatever he could find. “How are you going to cook for Haneul later? He will have to eat solid food one day. And not just instant ramen.”  
  
He rolled his eyes shortly. “I’ll think of something.”  
  
Woohyun sighed. “Seungah always had a lot in her fridge. She liked cooking.”  
  
“Well, I’m not Seungah.” Sunggyu replied bitterly. “She’s gone.”  
  
He headed out of the kitchen again since the mood had fallen extremely. Being reminded of Seungah always meant remembering that she was gone. Sunggyu knew his older sister had been a much better person. There was no need to remind him of that. He let Woohyun cook by himself. With a bit of luck, he really could cook a decent meal.  _As long as he doesn’t poison me..._  Sunggyu settled down in the living room and grabbed his sketchbook again. He skipped through the older pages. There were mostly drawings of buildings that he had thought of randomly or ideas for projects his boss had assigned to him, but in between those drawings were pages filled with different pictures. Animals, plants, persons – whatever had caught Sunggyu’s interest in that moment. Drawing was an important skill for an architect and it was a fun hobby for him. He loved making detailed drawings of almost everything.  
  
Sunggyu stopped turning the pages when he found a sketch of Seungah. Sometimes, when he had felt lonely, he had drawn her face. Seungah had never seen any of those pictures he drew of her. She never knew of their existence. They were only for Sunggyu, for his personal comfort. There were pictures of other people too, old lovers, random strangers on the streets that he had found handsome or intriguing. No sketches of his parents, though. He had never drawn them. Sunggyu sighed. He turned the pages until he reached an empty one at the back of the book. With the pencil tightly clasped in his fingers, Sunggyu started drawing.  
  
  
  
  
When he was done, Sunggyu stared at the pages. His mother’s face was on the left and his father’s on the right. He had drawn them from his memory so they were far from perfect but they still looked realistic enough. Now that the sketches were finished, he noticed that both faces were frowning at him. He hadn’t noticed it while drawing but neither of them was smiling. Maybe because he couldn’t remember his parents smiling at him very often. They had frowned at him most of the time. Frowned when he told them he likes boys. Frowned when he said he would go to Seoul. When he said he couldn’t come for Christmas because he was too busy. Always frowning in disapproval.  
  
“Wow. They look so real.” Sunggyu flinched when he heard the voice.  
  
He closed the sketchbook quickly and turned his head to glare dagger at Woohyun, who only smiled down at him in return. He felt his cheeks heat up. “Seeing how you frown so often, you definitely are related to them.”  
  
“If I frown often, it’s all because of you...” He muttered.  
  
Woohyun didn’t seem to have given up on being his friend yet and continued smiling. “The drawings are really good. Did you draw them without a reference?”  
  
Sunggyu didn’t feel like chatting with him, so he stood up and put the sketchbook away. “Have you finished cooking dinner?”  
  
The younger man muttered something under his breath and then said: “Yes, but I could’ve done a much better dish with more ingredients. But after tasting it, you will want to hire me as Haneul’s babysitter nevertheless. It surely is better than anything you ever cooked for yourself.”  
  
Sunggyu huffed. It wasn’t like he had bought a lot of stuff, so the choices had been limited. “What is it?”  
  
Woohyun grinned at him: “Ramen.”  
  
“Huh?!”


	8. Eight Bump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the first night together ends rockily~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i swear they will get together
> 
> like
> 
> one day

“You bragged about your cooking so much and you only cooked ramen?” Sunggyu scoffed.  
  
“It’s not my fault you have little to no ingredients in your kitchen! It’s not your usual ramen, I ensure you.” The younger man said. He stretched out his hand to point in the direction of the kitchen. “Come on. You need to eat something.”  
  
He still thought Woohyun was only bluffing about his cooking skill but Sunggyu was hungry anyways. He followed the other man to the kitchen table. There were two bowls on it, both with steaming content. Whenever Sunggyu made ramen, he usually just poured hot water over the noodles and added the spice, but Woohyun had put much more work in it it seemed. Sunggyu couldn’t really see the content since there was way too much cheese on top of it but somehow it smelled very different from usual.  
  
Woohyun grinned at him. “Smells good, doesn’t it? I made the broth myself with the help of some spices that were in the cupboard. The soup spices from those instant foods always taste like nothing. There was also some meat and cheese left in the fridge that I added. I know it’s only ramen but I guarantee that it’s the best ramen you have ever tasted! Well, the best under these kinds of circumstances. If only I had some bean sprouts or green onions...”  
  
“Yes, yes, I get it, my fridge sucks.” Sunggyu rolled his eyes.  
  
Woohyun pointed at the chair. “Just try it, okay? And if you like it enough, give me a chance to buy groceries and cook something proper tomorrow.”  
  
“You sure are working hard.” The older man muttered. He sat down on the chair and picked up the chopsticks.  
  
“I really want this job. I don’t care about the payment. I can sleep in a closet too. I’ll be happy enough just being close to Haneul and taking care of him.”  
  
Sunggyu pursed his lips.  _What are you – a saint?_ Was he lying or was he really that desperate? He wasn’t sure if he should give Woohyun a chance or not. “Just sit down and eat your ramen already.”  
  
Determined to find a flaw with Woohyun’s dish, he plunged his chopsticks into the sticky cheese to try the ramen. He blew on the noodles before putting them into his mouth. Sunggyu hissed shortly because they were still hot. They were cooked perfectly but cooking ramen noodles perfectly was hardly anything to get praise for. But something about the taste was…Sunggyu couldn’t put his finger on it. He had eaten ramen with cheese before but something else bothered him...  
  
He lifted the bowl carefully and tried the broth. Sunggyu’s eyes widened. “What’s this?!”  
  
The younger man chuckled. “It’s broth.”  
  
He rolled his eyes. “I know that much! It doesn’t taste like usual. What did you put into it? The new taste can’t come from the cheese and the meat alone.”  
  
“It’s my personal secret.” Woohyun grinned at him. “I’m going to keep it to myself so you will have no other choice but to hire me!””  
  
“Blackmail!” He scoffed. “Should have expected that from someone like you.”  
  
Woohyun’s smile fell. “I didn’t mean it like that...”  
  
Sunggyu felt something heavy in his stomach. He was being an asshole, wasn’t he? “C-Can’t you take a joke? Let’s just eat before it gets cold.”  
  
Dinner passed mostly in silence. Only slurping noises and the ticking of the clock could be heard. Sunggyu tried his best not to eat too quickly, though the ramen tasted really good. It had more flavor than the usual one he ate. Woohyun probably added additional spices to the broth but it was hard for the older man to pinpoint which he had used. He really had no clue about cooking at all. Maybe Woohyun’s words hadn’t been all bragging? Sunggyu could not cook and learning how to do it seemed like a bother. He would be busy enough with his work. Who was going to cook for Haneul then? He definitely needed a babysitter for that.  
  
Was Woohyun a worthy candidate for the job? Sunggyu still held somewhat a grudge for what happened with his sister, but he had to admit that everything wasn’t entirely Woohyun’s fault. At least if he told the truth. Sunggyu found it increasingly hard to continue doubting him, though. The younger man was at his best behavior and his attempts to win over Sunggyu seemed genuine. Woohyun really did seem to care about his son. Could he deny the young father this? Surely Haneul didn’t have to grow up without a mother  _and_  a father.  
  
It was difficult – making a decision for another living being. Haneul wasn’t old enough to speak his mind yet. He probably didn’t even know what a parent was yet. No matter which decision Sunggyu made, it was possible that Haneul would hate him for it later.  _God, I hate making decisions. It’s already hard enough just taking care of myself. Can I trust this guy?_  
  
“What about your job?”  
  
Woohyun stopped slurping and looked at him questioningly, noodles still hanging from his mouth. The older man made a face of disgust. “Let’s say you’d be able to become Haneul’s babysitter-“  
  
The other man’s eyes lit up. “Really?!”  
  
“Just hypothetically!” Sunggyu warned him. “What about your own job? Do you not want to continue being a surgeon? Would you give that up for Haneul? I doubt you’ll have the time for two jobs. I wouldn’t want you falling asleep while looking after the boy.”  
  
Woohyun shrugged. “I’ll just take a break for a while. I’m an excellent surgeon, you know, I can find work again whenever I want! People will bombard me with offers! When I left America, I was prepared to give up my career for Haneul.”  
  
Sunggyu could see the determination in his eyes when he spoke the last sentence. It was hard to doubt Woohyun’s words. He was different from Sunggyu, who could not imagine giving his job up at all. He had worked so hard to be in this position.  
  
“Does that mean you are considering my offer, hyung?”  
  
He puffed his cheeks shortly. “I’m just weighing my options. Cooking is not the only skill you will need.”  
  
“I know! I’ll work hard to convince you and Haneul!” He stood up and bowed 90 degrees. “Thank you!”  
  
Sunggyu pursed his lips. What was he getting himself into? He should just throw that guy out tomorrow and never talk to him again! “For now you can stay here until your bank grants you access to your money again. But if you ever call me asshole again, you can forget the job and you’re flying out of this apartment. My home, my rules. If I see something I don’t like, you’re out.”  
  
He didn’t wait for Woohyun to reply and stood up instead. He left his chopsticks on top of the empty bowl. “Thanks for dinner. Clean up the dishes before you sleep. I’ll leave some things for you on the couch.”  
  
Sunggyu left the kitchen without giving the younger man another glance. He grabbed his things from the living room and carried everything over to the bedroom. Sunggyu pushed the door open and it creaked slightly as it moved. He turned the light switch on with his elbow and looked around the room. Since Woohyun was going to sleep on the couch, Sunggyu would need to sleep in Seungah’s old bedroom. He took a deep breath as he took the room in. Everything was still as Seungah had left it before her death. Clothes and items were scattered around, the bed wasn’t made. The air was stuffy and seemed to bite his eyes. Or maybe he was just getting too emotional again.  
  
He dropped his things off at the table on the right side and went to the window next to open it wide. Fresh air flowed into the room and Sunggyu took another shaky breath. Was he even going to find sleep in here? Nothing was going as planned since Woohyun had appeared in his life. Sunggyu turned around again and started to clean up the room a bit. At least enough to make it possible to sleep in the bed. He changed the bedclothes as well. Not only because they were dusty but also because they smelled like his sister. She had been gone for a while now but her scent still lingered everywhere. Evidence of her existence was scattered throughout the room and it was almost like she could enter the room any moment now, laughing happily and jumping into his arms.  
  
Sunggyu pinched his nose bridge. “Shit…”  
  
“Hyung?” He jumped at the voice.  
  
“What is it now?!” Sunggyu asked, the annoyance clearly showing in his voice.  
  
Woohyun frowned shortly but kept his cool. “I’m done with the dishes. I just wanted to see if I can help you with anything since you seemed to be taking a while. It’s so dirty in here…Did you not use the room?”  
  
“No…it’s Seungah’s room. It felt…wrong to go in here. Like I’m invading her privacy.” Sunggyu muttered. “It’s dumb I know. She’s not here anymore, so what am I scared of? I should move on.”  
  
“It’s not dumb.” Woohyun’s voice sounded unexpected serious and the older man glanced at him. “It shows that she meant a lot to you. I understand you. When you keep things like this, it feels like she could return any second like nothing ever happened because everything is still the same. I think it’s normal to be afraid of letting go. I still can’t grasp it either…that she’s really not coming back.”  
  
Sunggyu hummed in reply. The younger man looked at him. “You know if you don’t want to sleep-“  
  
“It’s fine. I can’t run away from this forever. Seungah would probably hit me for letting her room get dirty like this.” He smiled shortly.  
  
Woohyun smiled back. “That sounds like something she would’ve done.”  
  
They looked at each other in silence until Sunggyu cleared his throat. “Anyways…I’m guessing you want to sleep. Let me get you something-“  
  
“It’s okay! I know where everything is. You just ready your own bed, hyung.” The younger man waved his hand awkwardly and left the room again.  
  
“When did I allow him to call me hyung anyways?” Sunggyu muttered.  
  
For a moment he wondered why Woohyun knew so much about the apartment, but then he remembered that the brown-haired man had owned a key to the apartment. Had he lived here with Seungah? His sister had never told him about something like that but there were a lot of things she hadn’t told him. Like the important fact that her so-called boyfriend was only sex friend. Sunggyu wondered why she never mentioned that important detail. The only reason he could think of was their mother. She would have never tolerated a wrong relationship like that. She had believed in the ‘no sex before marriage’ tradition. But why hadn’t she told him the truth?  
  
His heart got heavier just by thinking about his sister and their parents. Haneul was the only person left of his family now. Sunggyu felt tears stinging his eyes but he wiped them away quickly. He leaned his head back to force the tears away. He couldn’t keep crying. He had to hold on for Haneul. Sunggyu had to be a reliable uncle to him.  
  
He finished the preparations for his bed and changed into simple boxers and a shirt. Sunggyu set up his laptop on the desk and plugged the charger in. He still had some work to do before he could go to bed. Sunggyu left the room shortly to check up on Woohyun. The younger man was in the middle of setting up his sleeping place. “Do you need anything else?”  
  
Woohyun glanced at him and then shook his head. “No, thanks. What about Haneul? I mean who will look after him tonight?”  
  
Sunggyu gave him a blank look. “Obviously I. You are just a guest and I don’t trust you.”  
  
The smaller man huffed. “Fine, but if you aren’t waking up, then I’m going to help  _my_   _son_.”  
  
He thought about retorting something but Sunggyu couldn’t think of a proper reply. Woohyun would hardly kill his own son and it seemed kind of inappropriate to continue to attack him. “Whatever. I’m in my room.”  
  
Sunggyu walked away and he heard the man call “Good night” after him. He ignored it and went straight down the corridor to the nursery. Sunggyu slipped inside to check on Haneul. The boy was sleeping peacefully in his cradle. He stroked over Haneul’s small head. “I hope it was the right decision to let your father sleep here…”  
  
He headed back to Seungah’s bedroom and left both doors open on his way. Sunggyu sat down at his desk and put on his glasses. They helped him concentrate when he worked in front of a screen for a long time. He wasn’t sure if he would be able to sleep with a foreign guest in the house, so why not use the time for work? The last thing Sunggyu could afford right now was slacking off. He needed to make sure that he could continue to care for Haneul in the future. A lot of money would be necessary for that.  
  
Sunggyu sighed and looked at the screen of his laptop. “Okay, let’s do this.”  
  
  
  
  
It was already way past three when Haneul woke up. Sunggyu looked up from his handwritten notes and put the pen aside. He swayed shortly when he stood up. He groaned. “Stupid headaches…”  
  
Sunggyu caught himself again and headed towards the nursery. He felt tired and exhausted from working nonstop for hours. He had totally forgotten the time and now his body was screaming at him to sleep. Sunggyu entered the nursery and turned the light on. “Haneul-ah~ what’s wrong?”  
  
The boy cried in his cradle and angrily shook his fists. “ _Bwaah_!”  
  
He picked Haneul up carefully and held him against his chest. Sunggyu rocked him gently. “Did you pee your pants?”  
  
He sniffed the toddler’s behind and groaned. “God. I swear your poop smells like you ate tons of beans and onions.”  
  
Sunggyu put him down on the changing table and took the dirty diaper off. Although he was getting used to the routine, it didn’t make the smell any less revolting. “You poop so much for such a small baby.”  
  
He wrinkled up his nose and threw the dirty diaper into the bin. Sunggyu grabbed a fresh baby wipe and cleaned him up carefully. It was kind of weird to clean someone else so thoroughly but it wasn’t like Haneul could wipe his own butt. He needed to be clean to prevent infections, so the man could only grit his teeth and clean every nook and crease without a single complain. He didn’t even want to imagine how his mother had done the same to him long time ago.  
  
“I never thought I’d have to clean somebody else’s ass someday.” Sunggyu commented dryly.  
  
Haneul just looked at him with his quiet, curious eyes. He seemed to like being clean, but then again who didn’t? “All clear again. Happy?“  
  
The boy cooed at him and Sunggyu tickled his tummy. “You’re getting fat, Haneul-ah. I hope you’re going to lose all this baby fat later.”  
  
He put a fresh diaper on Haneul as soon as he was sure that the butt was completely dry again. Sunggyu put his clothes back on and then set the baby down in the cradle again. “Try to sleep again, okay?”  
  
Sunggyu cleaned up the changing table and then walked into the bathroom to wash his hands properly. He left the bathroom when he was done and almost ran into something. He jumped in surprise. “GOD!”  
  
“Oh- sorry-“  
  
“You scared me! Why are you not sleeping? Geez!” Sunggyu exclaimed.  
  
Woohyun threw him an apologetic look. “I just wanted to see if Haneul was alright. I heard him cry.”  
  
He sighed. “I already took care of it. His diaper was dirty. Go back to bed.”  
  
“Have you slept at all?” Woohyun suddenly asked as the older man was about to walk off.  
  
Sunggyu raised an eyebrow. “I don’t know what-“  
  
“I saw that your laptop was still on in Seungah’s bedroom. Did you work all this time? You look like you haven’t slept at all.”  
  
“I don’t think it’s your business…” Sunggyu muttered.  
  
Woohyun looked at him. It was hard to tell the emotion in his eyes because there was hardly any light in the corridor. “Can’t you rely on me a little? You can’t take care of Haneul if you faint like I did.”  
  
The older man pursed his lips shortly. “I’m going to bed soon. I just have to finish something first. Look after yourself, okay?”  
  
Sunggyu pushed past him and hid himself in Seungah’s room again. He sat down at the desk and rubbed his temples. Why did he have to get scolded by a man who had fainted in the park earlier? Did he look that bad? His head sure hurt a lot. “Just a few more minutes…”  
  
He went back to work but his eyes kept threatening to fall shut. Eventually though, Sunggyu lost the battle and his face landed on the keyboard of his laptop.  
  
  
  
  
Sunggyu awoke with a groan. He stretched his limbs with a quiet mewl. He turned around and pressed his face deeper into the fluffy pillow. He didn’t want to leave bed at all.  _Wait- bed?_  Sunggyu’s eyes snapped open and he sat up with a jolt. He blinked in surprise because he was lying in Seungah’s bed. The last thing he remembered was sitting in front of his laptop. Had he somehow carried his body over to the bed without actually being aware of it?  
  
“Shit…how long did I sleep?” Sunggyu looked around for his phone and found it on the bedside table. The clock read 11 am. He stared at the number in shock. “Oh god, Haneul! HANEUL?!”  
  
He ran out of the room and towards the nursery. Sunggyu got a second shock when he found the nursery empty.  _Woohyun!_  Had he kidnapped the baby while he was asleep? “Haneul?!”  
  
Sunggyu panicked and ran down the corridor towards the living room. “Han-“  
  
He came to a sudden stop and was met with Woohyun’s innocent gaze. The younger man was holding a finger in front of his mouth. “Ssh, hyung! He just fell asleep.”  
  
The older man looked for support at the nearest wall and glared at Woohyun as he tried to catch his breath. “You-! Why didn’t you wake me up? Who allowed you-“  
  
“Hyung, you were sleeping like a stone and you really needed that sleep. I’m quite capable of taking care of Haneul. I fed him and changed his diaper. And then I played with him until he fell asleep again. You can check if you want.”  
  
Sunggyu walked over to the couch and looked down at the sleeping toddler in Woohyun’s arms. He reached out to check Haneul’s breath and temperature. He also made sure that the diaper had been put on correctly. Sunggyu scrunched up his nose. “Seems like you did an acceptable job. I hope you made sure the bottle was clean and that the milk had the right temperature.”  
  
Woohyun smiled at him. “Of course! I’d never harm my own son. Actually, I should probably bring him back to his cradle before we wake him up. Or do you-“  
  
“It’s okay. Just go. He might wake up if I take him from you.” Sunggyu muttered.  
  
The brown-haired man beamed at him. “Thanks for trusting me!”  
  
He watched Woohyun leave. Sunggyu tried to find some kind of flaw in the way Woohyun carried the boy but the younger man did everything right. Maybe Woohyun had really practiced a lot in preparation of becoming Haneul’s father. It was too bad that Seungah couldn’t see this now. It seemed like she had wanted Woohyun to be part of Haneul’s life, so surely a scene like this would have made her happy.  
  
“Who says I trust you…” Sunggyu mumbled and shuffled towards the kitchen to cook a cup of coffee.  
  
He ended up cooking enough for two and even got two cups. Sunggyu placed them on the counter and grabbed milk and sugar. “Hyung, where- oh, in the kitchen.”  
  
Woohyun joined him with a happy expression. He sure was energetic today. “Is the second cup for me?”  
  
“You don’t need to drink it…” Sunggyu poured milk into his cup and then added three pieces of sugar, before adding the hot coffee.  
  
The younger man chuckled and Sunggyu looked at him. “What’s so funny?”  
  
“Seungah always prepared her coffee in the same way. First the milk, then three pieces of sugar and then the coffee.”  
  
He frowned. Sunggyu had never paid attention to how his sister had drunk her coffee. Not like he had seen her drink it that often. “She did?”  
  
Woohyun nodded and then smiled sadly. “Yeah.”  
  
The older man sipped at his coffee. “So…Seungah and you, you guys lived together in this apartment?”  
  
“No…not really. I had my own apartment but I slept over pretty often.” Woohyun replied after a moment of hesitation.  
  
“Often enough that she gave you a key.” Sunggyu noted bitterly.  
  
Woohyun hummed shortly. “It was easier like that.”  
  
“Easier to come and fuck her whenever you wanted? Without prot-“  
  
“Yah!” The brown-haired man interrupted him and glared at him. “These kinds of relationships work on a mutual agreement, you know. And we did take precautions usually. I don’t know how this- how Haneul happened. We were always careful since neither of us was planning on getting a kid and settle down anytime soon.”  
  
Sunggyu scratched the tabletop with his fingernail. “I still don’t understand this. Why did my sister get into a sex relationship with you? Why did she tell us you are her boyfriend? I always thought she’s- well-“  
  
“-an innocent and obedient country girl who would never do something like that?” Woohyun ended the sentence for him. “She wasn’t just your parents’ puppet, you know. She moved out of that house to get her own life. To do what  _she_  wanted. Although she didn’t run as far as you did. Seungah actually quite liked going to clubs and she was far from innocent. It just so happened that we both got drunk pretty hard at one party and ended up in bed together. And…well, we noticed that we could help each other relieve stress. Seungah wasn’t looking for a serious relationship and I didn’t want one either. We just wanted some freedom away from our parents’ expectations and since we were good friends, we could trust each other with a lot of things. Imagine her telling your parents that she was having regular sex with a man that she didn’t want to marry.”  
  
He was quiet for a moment, simply absorbing the things Woohyun had told him. His parents probably would’ve gotten a heart attack from news like that. Seungah had been their golden child, their hope after their son had disappeared like that. Maybe it was his fault that she had been so stressed in the past? He knew very well how much pressure their parents could build up sometimes.  
  
“It’s not your fault.” Woohyun suddenly said.  
  
The older man looked at him in surprise. “What?”  
  
“That she didn’t leave this town, it’s not your fault. Seungah talked to me about it once and she said that she liked it here, even though the town is small and there is hardly anything to do. Seungah loved your parents although they were very strict. She told me she didn’t have the same strength and bravery as you had. She couldn’t imagine leaving everyone she knows behind. She was too afraid.” Woohyun stared into the abyss of his coffee cup.  
  
“I wasn’t brave…or strong. I was a coward.” Sunggyu mumbled under his breath. He rubbed his eyes. His heart was aching. He hadn’t just gone to Seoul to become a famous architect. He had run away from his parents’ ideals. From their frowns and the pressure to be the perfect son and heir they wanted. Sunggyu hadn’t even thought about asking his sister if she wanted to go as well. Maybe they could’ve escaped together.  
  
Woohyun reached out for him. “Are you okay? Are you crying-“  
  
He slapped his hand away and grabbed his mug. His eyes burned. “I’m not crying! Stop talking as if you know me!”  
  
Sunggyu left the kitchen in anger. He wasn’t sure who he was angry at at the moment. Was he mad at Woohyun for talking like he knew him? Mad at himself for making the wrong decision? Or was he simply feeling jealous because a stranger seemed to know more about his sister than he did? How good had he really known Seungah?  
  
He let his body fall on the couch and sipped at his hot coffee with a frown. He could hear steps behind himself when Woohyun entered the living room. “I’m sorry.”  
  
Sunggyu didn’t look at him and the apology silently hung in the air. Woohyun didn’t say anything for a minute or two before he cleared his throat. “I’ll go outside and buy some groceries. For lunch and so on.”  
  
He glared at the turned off television and sipped his coffee. Woohyun sighed shortly and then Sunggyu could hear him clothing himself. A minute later he was out of the door. The older man stubbornly continued to glare at the black screen, at least until he remembered something.  
  
“Buy groceries?” He turned his head around. “Yah, Nam Woohyun! You don’t have any money!”  
  
Sunggyu glared at the front door. “This damn idiot!”  
  
The door opened suddenly and Woohyun sent him a sheepish grin. “I forgot I have no money.”  
  
And he was supposed to trust that man with Haneul’s well-being?


	9. Chapter Nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i keep forgetting to update AO3 ;-; sorry...blame the lack of comments here? haha..
> 
> the slow development road continues on~
> 
> side note: i'm going to just use "stroller" (instead of differentiating between stroller and buggy) now...since that's what english natives have advised me to use xD

Sunggyu pursed his lips in disapproval. “You’re an idiot, aren’t you?”  
  
Woohyun huffed. “I just wanted to give you some space so you can sob your heart out.”  
  
“I wasn’t crying!”  
  
“Yeah right.” They silently stared at each other until Woohyun gave in. “Anyways...your fridge sucks. We need food. Can you give me some money please? I’ll pay you back once I have access to my bank account.”  
  
The older man put his coffee mug down. He thought about giving Woohyun some money, but then he imagined the scenario of Woohyun running away with that money. There was also the possibility of  _him_  going grocery shopping, but first off, Sunggyu had no idea what to buy and second off, that would mean leaving Woohyun alone with Haneul. He could take the boy and escape while Sunggyu was distracted.  
  
There was only one solution, although it meant risking the wrath of a sleepy toddler. “We’ll go together.”  
  
Woohyun blinked. “What? But I just put Haneul into his crib…”  
  
“I don’t trust you with my money and I don’t trust you with Haneul, so there is no other solution. He loves sleeping in the stroller, so as long as we move him carefully, we should be fine.” Sunggyu refused to budge.  
  
“I thought we were past this.”  
  
“If you want to give up, you’re welcome to do so.” It was going to take time for him to trust Woohyun. He was never the type to trust someone easily. If Woohyun was going to give up from just this, he wasn’t worthy anyways.  
  
“Fine. Let’s go together. Can I get Haneul ready for the walk at least? Or do you think I’m going to strangle him to death?”  
  
Sunggyu looked at himself. He still had to get dressed and tame his bed hair. “Okay, but if you leave without me, I’m calling the police.”  
  
Woohyun beamed at him and immediately walked away to the nursery. Sunggyu gasped. “Yah! Your shoes!!”  
  
The younger man stopped in his tracks and took his dirty shoes off. He bowed his head shortly. “Sorry, hyung.”  
  
And then Woohyun ran off again like a happy puppy. Sunggyu huffed quietly and drank the rest of his coffee. Afterwards, he moved into the bathroom to get ready. He left the door ajar to check for any alarming sounds coming from Haneul’s nursery. Sunggyu washed his face and grabbed a comb to straighten his hair. The only noises his ears picked up were Woohyun’s voice and the rustling of clothes. He left the bathroom when he deemed himself presentable. Not presentable to Woohyun, of course. Sunggyu just didn’t want to look and smell like he was living under a bridge instead of a house. Plus, Haneul would hate it if he stank.  
  
He trailed out of the bathroom again and threw a look into the nursery. Haneul was still lying on the changing table, half-dressed for the little walk. Woohyun was looking down at him, not moving an inch. Sunggyu couldn’t see his face but he saw Haneul’s tiny fingers wrapped around one big finger. The boy still seemed to be sleeping, but the older man knew Haneul often started grabbing things in his sleep. It seemed to be a reflex, perhaps a sign of his fear of being left behind again. He saw Woohyun’s right hand cupping the boy’s head. His thumb caressed the baby’s forehead tenderly. Maybe Woohyun really did care about his son.  
  
Sunggyu smiled shortly, before he remembered it was Woohyun he was looking at. He turned away to get some fresh clothes to wear. Haneul never made any suspicious sounds and by the time he was fully dressed, Woohyun had already placed the toddler into his stroller. Haneul was peacefully lying in it, his arms raised and tiny fists resting next to his head. Sunggyu never understood how the boy could sleep like that.  
  
Woohyun grinned at him. “Did I do well?”  
  
_Is he expecting me to praise him now?_  Sunggyu curled his lips. “Let’s go. I have work to do and I can’t waste my time standing in the hallway.”  
  
He took control of the stroller and pushed it down the short hallway towards the front door. Woohyun ran past him to open the door for them and Sunggyu went through it wordlessly. He did have to let go of the handle then, since he had to lock the door from the outside. Surprisingly, Woohyun didn’t steal the stroller from him, but instead just made sure Haneul’s pillow/blanket was protecting him flawlessly. Babies lost their temperature real quick.  
  
“You don’t seem to be mad anymore about all of us going together.” Sunggyu noted as they headed towards the mart.  
  
The younger man smiled shortly and shrugged. “I’m happy that I get to spend some time with Haneul, even if I’m just walking beside the stroller. I’ve missed so much of his life already and I just...I don’t want to miss another second of it, you know? I’m sad you can’t trust me yet, but I understand. We haven’t known each other for very long and I...I wasn’t there when I should’ve been.”  
  
Sunggyu hummed. There wasn’t really anything to add to that. He pushed the stroller into the elevator and Woohyun took the place next to him. “Did you know Seungah was afraid of elevators?”  
  
He stared straight at the gray elevator door. The corners of his mouth twitched upwards shortly. “Yeah...she’d take the stairs whenever she could. It’s a wonder she’s never tried to push the stroller up the stairs.”  
  
“She once told me the reason behind her fear. I used to make fun of her for that.” Woohyun smiled sadly.  
  
Sunggyu gave him a look of surprise. “She told you that?”  
  
Seungah had always been so embarrassed of that memory that she had never shared it with anyone. She even made Sunggyu swear to take their secret to the grave with him. He had only been a young boy when Seungah and he got stuck in an elevator once during a power outage. It had happened in their hotel during a holiday in Busan. They had been alone in the elevator when the lights had flickered and then it had suddenly stopped. Of course that hadn’t been the scariest part about the elevator ride yet. Sunggyu had quite the trauma from that memory too, because he had surely never wanted to know about girls and their periods that early. He had screamed in shock when blood had run down her legs from under her skirt. Seungah, just another young 13 year old with no clue, had been scared as well. They had thought she was going to die, crying and screaming in fear for a long time, at least until they were saved from the elevator and their mother told Seungah she had just gotten her period for the first time.  
  
_Which boy wants to learn about why girls bleed from between their legs at 10?_ , Sunggyu thought with a light shudder. Maybe that memory had added to the fact that he grew up to like boys more, but who knew for sure. Not like he ever saw a shrink for it. When he became older, he had dealt with the memory like any other adult would. He had buried it deep in the soil of his mind where all the memories laid that were better off forgotten. Despite her mother’s reassurances, pads and years of experience, Seungah had never grown out of her fear of bleeding to death in a stuck elevator.  
  
In the end, it hadn’t been an elevator that killed her, Sunggyu thought bitterly. Somehow every memory seemed to end up feeling bittersweet. The shadow of her death still hung over his soul like a thick cloud. The elevator stopped with a  _bing_  and they got out again. Woohyun held the door open for him once more and the older man pushed the stroller onto the sidewalk.  
  
“We were best friends, so of course. We didn’t keep any secrets from each other!” Woohyun chuckled shortly. “And, well, she might have been a  _little_  drunk that night.”  
  
“My sister and you, you were just friends with benefits, right?” Woohyun nodded. “Why did you do that? Didn’t you want a real relationship? I still can’t wrap my head around it, sorry. I always thought she’d never do something like that.”  
  
The younger man shrugged after a moment. “I don’t think casual sex is that bad. We were both lonely and it was a great way to get rid of stress.”  
  
“Do you have someone else now? Another... _sex friend_.”  
  
“No. There was no one after I broke up with Seungah.” Woohyun replied without hesitation.  
  
Sunggyu continued his interrogation, determined to find out more about the mystery called Nam Woohyun. Not because of personal interest, of course, but simply in hope to catch him tripping over one of his lies. He found it hard to believe that his sister had lied about her ‘boyfriend’, even if it made sense because of their strict parents. “Why not?”  
  
The younger man ruffled his hair and continued walking. Sunggyu had no choice but to move again too. “I told you I was pretty busy in America. New job, new colleagues, another language, my stuff getting stolen...and I honestly wasn’t ready for another relationship, Steady or not. Though, even before the job offer came up, I kind of felt like Seungah and I should look for something more serious. Any other questions, Detective Kim?”  
  
He pursed his lips at the playful nickname. Sunggyu fought the urge to smile. The devil in him whispered to tell Woohyun ‘ _I just wanted to check if you’ve got more pregnant one-night-stands walking around that might come ringing at my door’_  but instead Sunggyu just said: “No.”  
  
“No? Okay, then it’s my turn. Hyung, did you know we went to the same school?”  
  
Sunggyu glanced at him. “We probably went to the same kindergarten, elementary, middle and high school. There’s only one of each in this small town, so that isn’t very hard to guess.”  
  
Despite their town being  _super_  small, Sunggyu didn’t remember ever meeting Woohyun or noticing his existence. Not hard since the other man was younger than him. Sunggyu had never really interacted with his juniors.  
  
Woohyun puffed his cheeks shortly.  _Is he pouting?_  “I could’ve moved here from another city!”  
  
“No, you got that look.”  
  
“That look??”  
  
“ _Hmh._  I look at you and I know you’re from here.” Woohyun’s face just screamed ‘HELLO! I’M FROM A SMALL TOWN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE’.  
  
The younger man laughed, loud and light. “You’re funny, hyung. Seungah told me you’re funny. I guess she was right, like always.”  
  
“Lies. She always called me grumpy instead of funny.”  
  
“Maybe she did call you that sometimes, but she liked you a lot. I even once believed she was in love with you.” Woohyun laughed again.  
  
Sunggyu grimaced. The younger man continued. “She always spoke so highly of you. I hoped to meet her  _awesome_  brother one day, but I didn’t expect us to meet under such circumstances.”  
  
He looked down at the sleeping Haneul shortly. “No one expected any of this.”  
  
The pregnancy, the death of his family...so many things he had never expected. “She would’ve been a great mom. She loved kids.”  
  
He glanced at Woohyun. “Yeah. I guess that’s finally something we agree on.”  
  
  
  
  
  
  
“So what do you like to eat?” Woohyun asked casually as they walked through the mart. Not once had Woohyun asked on the way if he was allowed to push the stroller too.  
  
“Never mind me, just think about Haneul.” Sunggyu muttered as he pushed the stroller forward. People were giving them weird looks – two men with a baby after all – but he ignored them all.  
  
“I’m guessing you like meat.” The younger man replied. He grabbed a few things here and there on their way without asking Sunggyu for permission.  
  
“Don’t buy too much. I don’t know for how much longer I’m going to stay here.”  
  
“Yes~! Sunggyu-hyung, can we buy some baby food for him? He’s already big enough to eat more than just milk.”  
  
He pursed his lips. "I guess we can try it out. Do you even know what to buy?"  
  
After Woohyun had told him about the "solid food" issue last time, Sunggyu had checked it and it was true that babies started to eat other things at around six months, depending on the toddler. Haneul could try it out and if he didn't want it, well, that was it.  
  
"Yes! Well, I don't know what he'll like but that's something we have to try out."  
  
_We_. How casually Woohyun was already speaking as if there were no doubt they'd raise the baby together. Sunggyu still wasn't sure. He knew he'd need a helping hand when he went back to work. It was just hard to get rid of his distrust. It had decreased already with Woohyun's last explanations, but Sunggyu wasn't sure if it would ever disappear. Maybe he could try and contact Seungah's old friends to check if Woohyun's stories of his sister were true. It was hard for him to imagine Seungah - or anyone else - could have a relationship purely based on sex. Maybe he was the old-fashioned one to expect love to be the reason behind a relationship?  
  
"He seems to like strawberry." Sunggyu mumbled.  
  
Woohyun turned around. "Did you say something, hyung?"  
  
"Buy something with strawberries."  
  
Little whines came from the stroller. " _Ba! Baaaa!_ "  
  
That probably meant he was supposed to move again. His Majesty Haneul, the great toddler, wanted his carriage to set forward again. Sunggyu didn't want to risk Haneul throwing a fit in the small supermarket, so he got moving again.  
  
"It's not 'Ba', Haneul. Move is the word you're looking for. Move! With an easy to pronounce Muuuuu-"  
  
There was a giggle to his left. His face went hot and he sent Woohyun a glare. The younger man couldn't hide his amusement no matter how hard he tried.  
  
Sunggyu narrowed his eyes at him. "Don’t you dare say a word."  
  
Woohyun was quiet but just when Sunggyu went around the corner, he said: "Muuuuu"'.  
  
_I hate him!_ Sunggyu was just trying to teach Haneul more sounds! It was important that the toddler learned to speak! That was nothing to laugh at! He puffed his cheeks stubbornly as he pushed the stroller towards the toddler section. There wasn't a lot to choose from since it was a small supermarket.  
  
"Why don't you choose something, Haneul?" The little boy was still awake and looking at him but making no move whatsoever to choose a glass. Well, not like he could see anything with his back facing the shelf.  
  
They ended up choosing flavors randomly, just paying attention that it was food for Haneul's age and that there wasn't anything suspicious in it. In the midst of all the grocery shopping, he momentarily forgot that it was Woohyun there with him. Woohyun, who had left Sunggyu’s sister alone when she had needed him - unknowingly or not. At some point it had just felt like shopping with a friend and when Sunggyu noticed that, he was both confused and angry with himself. Woohyun wasn't a friend!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Sunggyu rubbed his temples as they exited the mart. His head had been hurting since he woke up, but it didn't seem to be getting better. He'd take something at home.  
  
"Are you okay?" Woohyun asked, seemingly worried.  
  
"I'm fine. Just a headache." He ended the conversation by walking ahead.  
  
"Sunggyu-" Woohyun was interrupted when the older man's phone started ringing.  
  
He stopped walking and pulled the phone from his pocket. The caller ID made him smile. "Hello Minho."  
  
"Hyung! How are you?"  
  
_Tired. Headache. Still feeling like I'm in a big black hole._  "I'm fine. What about you?"  
  
"Don't lie, hyung. Your whole family died...of course you're not okay. You don't have to come back to work so early, you know."  
  
_And stay at home to face the emptiness every day?_  "Stop worrying so much. I need this...the distraction."  
  
"Fine! At least I can watch over you directly then. I'll make you eat properly!" Minho said.  
  
Sunggyu smiled again. "Yes, yes, you can mother me all you want soon. Listen, I'm outside with Haneul and he's getting upset because we’ve stopped moving. We'll talk soon, okay?"  
  
"Okay, hyung! Travel back safely! I love you~"  
  
"I love you too!" He replied playfully and hung up. Sunggyu put his phone away again and resumed his walking.  
  
"Was that your boyfriend?" Woohyun asked curiously and came up beside him.  
  
He frowned. "Boyfriend? No, he's just a colleague. What even gave you that idea? You can tell men I love you without being gay!"  
  
The younger man laughed and lifted his hands defensively. "Sorry. Seungah just mentioned it before...that you like men, I mean."  
  
"Why did she tell you that? It's none of your business!" He snapped at the other man.  
  
"No need to be so defensive about it. She knew I wouldn't judge you. I'm bi...and my parents never liked that. When I told her that, she said I should be brave like you and she told me how you came out to your parents."  
  
He definitely didn't want to remember that. It was not a very pleasant memory and it certainly hadn't had anything to do with being brave. Seungah had always exaggerated when it came to him. He felt uncomfortable with the fact that Woohyun knew so much about him, yet his knowledge of Woohyun's past was very limited.  
  
"That was a mess if anything. I sure hope you didn't copy what she told you."  
  
"Well...I tried and it sort of escalated." Woohyun said. Sunggyu had expected nothing less, since the situation had also escalated for him. "To be honest, we didn't just fake the relationship because of Seungah's, your, parents. We also did it to make mine happy. They thought I was dating a girl and that I was freed from my demonic lust for men. And your parents didn't push her into finding a man to marry anymore or judge her for having only a sexual relationship."  
  
Well, Sunggyu knew a lot about parents not liking the fact that their son loved dicks more than breasts. He could sympathize with Woohyun on that topic. He couldn't even blame him for using his sister because Seungah had used him too. Maybe it was better their parents had died without knowing about it.  
  
"I still don't quite get it...how you can be with someone just for...sex."  
  
"Why? Don't tell me you think sex, no,  _making love_  can only happy between two people who love each other?" Woohyun chuckled.  
  
Sunggyu pushed the stroller a little faster to get away from the younger man and his questions. Woohyun easily adapted to the new speed though. " _Really_? I mean, I'm not saying it's a stupid thought. It's great. I just never thought you'd be the type to believe in love."  
  
He huffed. "Don't make the mistake of thinking you know me just because Seungah told you some, most likely exaggerated stories from my childhood days."  
  
Woohyun laughed. "Oh don't worry. You're as much of a mystery as Seungah was. But I do hope we can overcome this and get to know each other better, since you'll have custody of my son."  
  
"Don't think I'll fall for you though. You're not my type!" Actually, Woohyun really was his type, but there was no reason to tell him that. Sunggyu thought he'd try to use it against him. Besides, no way he'd fall for that guy!  
  
"Don't worry. I won't try anything. That's not why I'm here. We're just cooperating for Haneul's sake. We are...friends!"  
  
"No, no friends! More like work partners, colleagues." Sunggyu corrected him. "There’s no need for more."  
  
Woohyun huffed but didn't comment on the issue further. They reached Seungah's old apartment again soon and took the elevator upstairs. The younger man went to unpack the groceries while Sunggyu brought Haneul to the nursery. He rid the toddler of the thick layers of clothing before he could start to sweat.  
  
As he checked Haneul's diaper, his sight got blurry shortly. He groaned and rubbed his eyes. The headache was back stronger than before. Sunggyu swayed a little and supported himself on the changing table. He shook his head as if that would shake off the pain. " _Argh_..."  
  
Sunggyu waited until it was over before he continued. Haneul's big eyes were focused on him. He was quietly watching, observing, him seemingly worried. Could a baby his age already tell when something was wrong? "I'm fine, Haneul."  
  
He finished dressing the boy and then placed him in the playing pen. Sunggyu took the rattle and shook it. He smiled down at Haneul. "What’s that noise,  _hm_? Where does it come from?"

 

When he shook it to Haneul's left, the boy turned his head that way. The toddler expertly followed the noise around while releasing cute noises. He continued to babble in a mix of vowels, which made it impossible to understand him, but it was a good sign. Haneul was trying to talk -  _was_  talking in his opinion. Who knew what he was telling Sunggyu right now, but he was talking. It was important to act along, to talk with the toddler and make him feel like they were having a legit conversation. So Sunggyu talked with him and asked him questions as he played with Haneul.  
  
"Hyung-" Woohyun's voice made him jump. He had honestly forgotten about the younger man. "I didn't mean to startle you. I'm going ahead and cook lunch for us. I think you could use a proper meal."  
  
He left again and Sunggyu rolled his eyes. "You're the one that landed in a hospital not too long ago."  
  
"Right, Haneul?" Sunggyu asked the toddler, who was busy chewing on a biting ring. "We bought yummy new food today. I really hope you'll like it. It was very expensive you know!"  
  
Haneul looked at him curiously. " _Da! Da!!_ "  
  
"Exactly what I said!" Sunggyu replied cheerfully. Haneul reached out his hands, his silent way of asking to be held. "No. I have to get back to work. Listen, I'll bring my laptop and work here, but you have to play by yourself for a while, okay?"  
  
Haneul ignored him and went back to chewing on his toy. He took it as a good sign. The toddler didn't seem sleepy at all, so Sunggyu knew better than to put him into the crib. He left the room shortly to grab his laptop and then went back to get settled in a chair.  
  
The boy looked up when he returned, his eyes focusing on the dark thing on Sunggyu's lap. He chuckled. "You're too young to use this, Haneul."  
  
" _Ah! Ah! Baaa!_ " Haneul exclaimed in excitement. His eyes shone with unlimited curiosity.  
  
"No, you can't have this one. Go play with your toys, Haneul. Let uncle work please. I'll play with you later, I promise."  
  
Of course Haneul was too young to understand his words. Sunggyu saw his face getting red even before his lips started to tremble. "No, Haneul, you can't get everything you want by crying. I'm not going to give in today."  
  
Haneul continued to beg in his baby language but Sunggyu just stared right at his screen. He had to get somewhere today. His boss needed the plan for the building as soon as possible. He should've expected it would be hard to work with Haneul there, but Sunggyu couldn't ask for more time off work.  
  
" _Bbwwwaaaa_ " Haneul started to cry. He always started out with a low volume and he'd slowly get louder when no one reacted. Sunggyu knew he was going to scream soon to get his way, but he couldn't always give in. Haneul would start to think he could get any wish fulfilled if he just screamed loud enough.  
  
"Haneul...I'm right here and I'm not leaving, okay? You were playing by yourself before I went to get my laptop and you can do it now." Sunggyu spoke without looking up from his sketch.  
  
The toddler didn't stop. If there was something, anyone, more stubborn than a baby out there, Sunggyu would like to know. He sighed and saved his progress. After standing up, he set the laptop down on the chair and walked over to the playing pen. Haneul looked up and him without stopping his cries.  
  
"Don't give me that look like I'm the bad guy here! Someone needs to make money and it's not you for sure." Sunggyu picked him up with a slight groan "Gosh, you're getting heavy."  
  
Haneul's cries quieted down almost immediately in his hands. Sunggyu felt the boy grabbing his shirt. Slight tremors still shook Haneul's small body and the older man felt an urge to protect him. "There, there."  
  
Sunggyu kept patting the toddler's back until Haneul seemed calm again. He heard Woohyun shout something from the kitchen. "Do you need help?"  
  
"No, I've got it under control!" He called back, although not too loudly since the baby was still in his arms. Woohyun was making lunch, so obviously he couldn't watch Haneul at the moment. And Sunggyu wasn't ready to admit that he needed help.  
  
"Are you calm now?" He asked the toddler.  
  
Haneul lifted his head again and looked around. His hand pointed at the laptop again. " _Ttt! Ah_!"  
  
"No, you can't touch that. It's very important."  
  
Haneul didn't understand the concept of no. He kept babbling and twisted around in Sunggyu's arm, probably trying to reach his destination on his own. "Don't move so much! You're going to drop!"  
  
He was scared of Haneul falling down. The boy was quite strong and flexible. He could twist quickly when he wanted. Sunggyu tried his best to prevent any escape but had to get a bit rough sometimes. Haneul was unhappy again and started to whine once more.  
  
"You've got this stubbornness from my sister, I swear!" Sunggyu was close to losing his patience too. “ _God_! Fine, I’ll show you the laptop! But you cannot touch it, you hear me?”  
  
Sunggyu walked over to the chair and the boy calmed down as he noticed that he had succeeded. Haneul stopped moving, so Sunggyu heaved him into another position. He turned the laptop around and crouched down to let Haneul see the colorful screen. The toddler eyed the object with great interest, totally observed by it. His hands kept trying to grab it but Sunggyu didn’t let him. “That’s as close as you are getting to it, Haneul. This is my precious work.”  
  
Haneul gave him a teary-eyed look and struggled to get closer. Sunggyu sighed. “If you’re being like that, we will go away again.”  
  
He stood up to bring the toddler somewhere else when suddenly Haneul retched. Then he threw up, right over Sunggyu’s laptop. The bile landed on his keyboard and Sunggyu gasped in shock. “NO!”  
  
The laptop screen went black and his heart stopped. Sunggyu ran over to the crib and roughly put Haneul into it. “HANEUL! THAT’S WHY YOU WEREN’T SUPPOSED TO GET CLOSE TO IT! FUCK!”  
  
Sunggyu grabbed some tissues from the changing table and hastily cleaned his laptop. He wiped over the keyboard in panic and let  _juices_  flow out between the keys. “Shit!”  
  
“What if all my work is destroyed?! Shit!” The older man kept cursing as he tried to save his laptop. He was so absorbed in his anger that he didn’t care about Haneul’s distressed cries. “Shut up for god’s sake! You’ve already done enough!”  
  
Woohyun came running. “What happened?”  
  
“He fucking threw up on my laptop! And now it’s turned off!” Sunggyu shouted at him.  
  
The younger man frowned and walked past him to the crib. “Haneul-ah- oh god-“  
  
Woohyun pulled him out of the crib and Haneul coughed and retched. He glared at Sunggyu. “What’s wrong with you?! Does your laptop matter more than your nephew’s health and life? You should’ve checked on Haneul! You can’t just lie him down on his back when he’s throwing up! He could’ve choked on the bile!”  
  
Woohyun took off with the crying and coughing toddler in his arms. Sunggyu gritted his teeth. For a second he wanted to shout back in anger again, but then he realized what a huge mistake he had made. Of course his work was important and Sunggyu was finished if the laptop was ruined, but Woohyun was right, he could’ve killed Haneul. He had just thrown him in the crib without consideration or asking himself why Haneul threw up in the first place.  
  
Tears stung his eyes and he threw the dirty tissue to the ground angrily. Sunggyu grabbed his hair in distress. He had almost harmed his sister’s child, no, he  _had_  harmed Haneul. What was he doing? The tiredness, the headache and stress had made him snap at the toddler. A baby who couldn’t really tell what was right or wrong. Haneul hadn’t thrown up on his laptop intentionally.  _I promised to protect him..._  
  
Maybe everyone was right, he couldn’t do this alone. Who knew when the stress would make him do something like this again... He was a danger to Haneul like this.  _Forgive me, Seungah. Haneul, I’m sorry..._  Sunggyu buried his face in his hands and cried silently as the weight of his mistake and the past days caught up with him.  
  


  
  
  
  
  
  



	10. Tenth Bump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sunggyu is ready to admit he needs help

Sunggyu stayed in the nursery for a while. Woohyun didn’t return with Haneul but the older man knew they hadn’t left the apartment. He was worried about Haneul but he didn’t dare to leave the room. His mistake still weighed heavily on his shoulders. After all the accusations he had thrown at Woohyun for being irresponsible and unable to help raise a child, how could he have snapped at Haneul like that? Sunggyu wondered if Seungah had ever felt like he did now. Did she ever lose her cool alone with Haneul? It seemed impossible to do this alone, especially when you had to work as well. How did she do it? Haneul needed attention almost 24/7. There were so many things to pay attention to that Sunggyu’s head was swimming. He knew he couldn’t do this alone but was Sunggyu ready to admit that to Woohyun?  
  
The younger man only entered the room once while Sunggyu was sulking. He just got some supplies and then left again without a word leaving his lips. Woohyun didn’t even look at him or acknowledge his presence. When he was gone, Sunggyu grabbed his laptop and tried his best to save whatever he could. It turned on without a problem when he tried it again. Sunggyu stared at the screen while the system booted. Maybe he had pressed the wrong button earlier in his state of shock? The laptop asked for his password and he quickly entered it, waiting for all the programs to load afterwards. Sunggyu opened his project again and to his utmost relief the program had auto-saved the last changes. He recovered the file and then saved it once more, before putting the laptop away again. Sunggyu brought it back to the desk in Seungah’s old room and then stood there awkwardly. Was he ready to face Haneul again?  
  
Still not feeling ready, Sunggyu stopped by the bathroom first to wash his face. Woohyun didn’t need to know he had cried. His eyes were still red and puffy afterwards, but Sunggyu felt a bit better. The cold water had cleared the fog in his mind a bit. He reluctantly left the bathroom again and shuffled towards the living room. Woohyun threw him a glare when he entered. Sunggyu flinched slightly in guilt. He knew he was in the wrong this time. The older man came closer nevertheless. Woohyun was sitting on the couch with Haneul in his arms. The baby was awake and obviously still very distressed even if he wasn’t crying out loud. When Sunggyu was close enough, Haneul looked at him. The man silently wished the boy would hold out his hands and ask to enter his arms, but instead Haneul suddenly whined and turned away, curling deeper into Woohyun’s chest.  
  
The rejection felt like a punch in his guts. Sunggyu bit his lower lip. It was probably obvious how crushed he felt because Woohyun tried to comfort him suddenly. “Haneul will forgive you, just give him some time. He’s still scared because you shouted at him.”  
  
He was scared to meet Woohyun’s eyes, so Sunggyu just nodded shortly and walked away again. Woohyun called after him. “Can you check on the food in the kitchen? The soup still has to cook for about 15 minutes, you just need to stir it from time to time.”  
  
“Sure.” Had his voice always sounded this weak and broken?  
  
  
  
  
  
While he took care of lunch, Sunggyu looked for information on his smartphone. He looked up why babies would throw up suddenly. There were a lot of reasons apparently, two being stress and anxiousness. Someone also wrote that toddlers were very empathic. They could tell if their parents were sick, angry or stressed out and sometimes that affected the baby in return. They could get anxious and sick simply because their mother wasn’t feeling well. Had Haneul been distressed because of him? Sunggyu knew his body wasn’t doing well. The constant headaches that sometimes spiked out of nowhere and made his vision blur. The weak feeling in his limbs and the exhaustion. Sunggyu had ignored the signs all along but he was hopelessly overworked. His family’s death, the funeral, his work, Haneul, Woohyun, this apartment and the future – so many things had happened and many still weighed on his mind. Haneul was oblivious to all of this and Sunggyu felt a little jealous of him.  
  
He heard steps behind himself and turned his head. Woohyun entered the kitchen without Haneul. “I’ve put him back into the crib. He’s fallen asleep again.”  
  
Sunggyu avoided meeting his gaze. “Is he okay? Did he throw up again?”  
  
“No, he didn’t. I’m not a doctor but Haneul seems to be okay for now.”  
  
The older man nodded and withdrew back to his thoughts. He stared at a distant spot and silence engulfed them again until Woohyun decided he had enough. “What was that back there? What happened?”  
  
Sunggyu pursed his lips. “I don’t know. Haneul wanted to see the laptop so badly, so I showed it to him, but then he threw up all of a sudden and I thought my laptop was done for. I need to get this project done so my boss won’t get mad. I know it wasn’t Haneul’s fault but I... I was just so angry. I wasn’t thinking.”  
  
“Yeah, you sure as hell weren’t thinking.” Woohyun replied dryly. Sunggyu’s shoulders slumped. “Do you want to know what I’m thinking?”  
  
He glanced at the younger man questioningly. “That I’m an asshole who shouts at little children and takes his anger out on them?”  
  
Woohyun snorted. “No. I think you need a good meal and a long rest in bed. You’re stressed out, Sunggyu. I’d need to be blind not to notice. You don’t sleep or eat much, but you constantly care for Haneul or work on your project. You’re not a robot, you know. It’s human to snap eventually. You’ve gone through a lot and no one expects you to just be fine. Your boss will understand if you can’t make it in time or he’s an asshole.”  
  
Sunggyu was surprised by the younger man’s words. He had expected Woohyun to shout at him, maybe grab his collar and punch him for treating Haneul like that. He hadn’t expected understanding. Sunggyu wanted to reply “I’m fine!” but honestly, he wasn’t fine. He was very far from it. Knowing that and admitting it out loud were two different things. Sunggyu felt incredible broken but could he afford to let weakness show when he had to take care of a child? He had to be strong for Haneul – right?  
  
“Did you even take the time to properly mourn for Seungah and your parents?” Woohyun asked suddenly.  
  
He opened his mouth to speak but hesitated. Did he mourn? Sunggyu had cried a lot the night he sat by Seungah’s bed and he had cried at the funeral, but after that? He had tried to avoid reality. Whenever Sunggyu felt close to tears because memories overwhelmed him, he usually pushed them far away and hid behind his walls. “I...I was busy. I went to the funeral.”  
  
As if that were a justification. “You’ve lost your whole family. You don’t just overcome that overnight.”  
  
Tears welled up in his eyes and Sunggyu struggled to fight them. “I can’t sit around in a corner and cry when Haneul needs someone. He needs me so I...need to move on. I need to be responsible.”  
  
“It’s true but...you don’t have to do this alone. I’m not saying you should immediately trust strangers like me, but there are people who can help in these situations.”  
  
“And make the social workers think I’m unable to care for Haneul? They’ll take him away.” He didn’t want to disappoint Seungah like that. “I won’t let that happen.”  
  
“I think scenes like the one in the nursery would shock them much more.” Woohyun retorted. He stepped closer and Sunggyu flinched slightly, but the younger man just went for the pot with the soup in it. Woohyun stirred it. “I know I said I won’t fight you for custody but if I have to... I will protect my son.”  
  
Sunggyu swallowed hard. He turned away slightly to wipe away the traitorous tears breaking free.  “I’m surprised you didn’t immediately call the child protective services.”  
  
“You just snapped once, so what? I’ve told you before...I don’t deserve to be Haneul’s father. I’m too late for that...” Woohyun sighed. “Besides, I wouldn’t be able to do this alone either. I’m ready to admit it. There’s nothing wrong with asking for help. We didn’t have the best start but we have a common interest – Haneul. We should work together and not against each other.”  
  
“If only Seungah were still here...” Sunggyu muttered weakly.  
  
“But she’s not coming back. You know that, right?”  
  
“I know...” But somehow it still felt like she could walk into the apartment again at any moment. This was  _her_  home after all. Sometimes it was easy to lose himself in the fantasy of her being still alive. Sometimes when the phone started ringing, he expected a call from his parents. They were comforting thoughts when he felt all alone.  
  
“Maybe it’s a good idea to move back to Seoul. To leave all of this behind...” Woohyun suddenly said.  
  
Sunggyu stayed silent and the younger man cleared his throat after a moment. “Let’s eat. Haneul’s asleep, so no better time than now and you look like you really need that energy.”  
  
Woohyun grabbed a ladle and scooped some of the soup into a bowl. Sunggyu wiped his eyes one last time and took a deep breath. “I’ll eat in S- my room. Thanks for the food.”  
  
The older man took the full bowl and a spoon before heading out of the kitchen. Woohyun didn’t argue though Sunggyu could feel the other man’s heavy gaze on his back. It wasn’t personal. Sunggyu just wanted to be alone right now. He needed to think and Woohyun was far too distracting. With the hot bowl in his hands, Sunggyu entered Seungah’s old room. He set it down on the desk. For a moment, he wondered if he should check on Haneul or not, but Sunggyu was afraid of waking the toddler up. Besides, he wasn’t sure if he could take another rejection. The memory of Haneul turning away from him still hurt.  
  
As Sunggyu ate the soup – which tasted amazing, damn that Nam Woohyun! – he went through the messages on his phone. Mostly Seungah’s. Sunggyu read their past conversations while his heart ached. The last message was from the day of the accident and it seemed kind of unreal. Sunggyu wondered what her last thoughts had been. Had she noticed him in the hospital? Had she left this world knowing how much she had meant to her younger brother? Sunggyu wasn’t sure when he told her ‘I love you’ last time. It hadn’t seemed necessary. She was always there after all. The thought of losing her had never crossed his mind. Sunggyu took her presence for granted and now there were so many things about the past he wished to change.  
  
 _You only know what you had when you lose it_ – wasn’t that what people always said? It was true, Sunggyu thought. He found himself writing a short message (‘I miss you, noona. Come back home.’) but then he laughed at his own silliness. The anger returned afterwards and Sunggyu ended up deleting all the messages between them. He regretted his actions for a second but then he scolded himself. What good was it to keep the messages? His sister would never reply again and reading the messages wasn’t going to change that fact. It was only hurting him, reminding him of his mistakes.  
  
Sunggyu looked around the room, at all the things Seungah had owned.  _How long are you going to hide yourself in this apartment, Kim Sunggyu? Surrounded by her stuff and presence at every moment, how can you let go of her? Are you really too busy to go back to Seoul or are you just looking for excuses? Waiting for her impossible return?_  
  
It was hard to admit, but maybe Woohyun was right.  
  
  
  
  
  
After he had finished the soup, Sunggyu went into the bathroom. He took a long shower and put on fresh clothes afterwards. He wasn’t sure if it was thanks to the shower, the soup or his newfound resolution, but he felt better somewhat. Sunggyu grabbed his wallet when he was done and walked into the living room. “Woohyun.”  
  
The younger man jumped in his spot on the couch, turning his head away from the television and towards Sunggyu. Woohyun gave him a questioning look. “I’m going out for a while. Look after Haneul. Call me on my phone if anything happens.”  
  
He walked out of the room and towards the front door. Sunggyu slipped into his shoes. Hurried steps came closer. “Where are you going?”  
  
“I have to buy something.” He grabbed his coat from the wardrobe and put it on.  
  
Woohyun still seemed confused. “You’re leaving me alone with Haneul? Seriously?”  
  
“If you ask one more time, I’ll start doubting my decision, so just shut up for now.” Sunggyu opened the front door to leave.  
  
“B-But I don’t have your number-“  
  
“I left a note on my desk.” Sunggyu said and then closed the door in Woohyun’s face.  
  
  
  
  
  
It took him almost two hours to return. Sunggyu didn’t know how hard it would be to get some boxes for moving in that small town. People never moved out of houses here, one might start to think, and it was probably the truth. With the folded cardboard boxes under his arms, Sunggyu stood in front of the apartment door. The other side was quiet, almost too quiet, and he was afraid of entering. What if Woohyun had left with Haneul in tow? Sunggyu licked his lips nervously, but then overcame his fear and opened the door.  
  
“I’m home.” He announced carefully and then in the next moment wondered why he had even said that.  _Home_ , this wasn’t his home. “Woohyun? Haneul?”  
  
Sunggyu closed the front door and took off his shoes and coat. He dragged the cardboard boxes over to Seungah’s old room. His ears picked up noises from the nursery and relief washed over him. Sunggyu opened the door quietly and peeked inside. Woohyun looked up immediately. “Oh, you’re back. Sorry I didn’t hear.”  
  
The younger man was sitting on the floor with Haneul’s toys strewn everywhere around him. Said toddler was busy chewing on one of the rubber cubes, at least until Woohyun’s voice grabbed his attention. Haneul followed the man’s gaze and looked at Sunggyu. The older man held his breath and stood still in the doorframe. Would Haneul turn away again? But then the toddler cooed and smiled. He started crawling towards Sunggyu with an eagerness that made the adult want to cry.  
  
He crouched down and picked Haneul up. Sunggyu smiled back at the child. There were no words to describe how happy he felt to see Haneul smiling at him again. It seemed like babies were indeed quick to forgive (or forget?). “Did you miss me, Haneul-ah?”  
  
Tiny hands touched his cheeks as if to grab his face. Haneul babbled happily. Sunggyu saw Woohyun standing up. “See? He’s not mad anymore.”  
  
Sunggyu held the boy tightly. “You were right...about a lot of things. I was overworking myself. I haven’t been able to take a break and Haneul had to suffer for it. It’s good that you’re...here.”  
  
 _Wow that was hard to say out loud._  Woohyun beamed at him. “Does that mean I can stay?”  
  
Sunggyu looked at the toddler in his arms, drooling all over his shirt. Haneul needed someone to take care of him, someone dependable. Right now the older man wasn’t very dependable. It was impossible to do everything alone and he needed help from somebody, someone to support him when he was busy or sick. There seemed to be little reasons why Nam Woohyun shouldn’t be that person.  
  
“For now.” He muttered stubbornly.  
  
  
  
  
Maybe telling Woohyun he was right hadn’t been the best idea. Sunggyu was sent to his room by the younger man with the order to rest. He found it hard to argue back when he was truthfully thankful for the forced break. When his face hit the pillow, Sunggyu didn’t even have time to count the seconds before he was gone. He had felt so exhausted that his brain had gladly turned off for a few hours. After the long sleep, Sunggyu felt a lot better again. When he stretched his limbs and turned around in bed, his eyes spotted a glass of water and a pill on the bedside table. Had Woohyun been in the room? Sunggyu sat up and rubbed his belly absent-mindedly. A yawn slipped free. He put the pill into his mouth and swallowed it with some water. Maybe he had judged the younger man wrongly because of his grudge, but he had needed someone to blame. If there was no one to blame, Sunggyu could only blame himself for the accident.  
  
 _No, I should stop looking for someone to blame. It was an accident. Neither Woohyun nor I could’ve changed anything about it._ Sunggyu slipped out of bed and shuffled towards the door. He cracked it open and listened for a sound. He heard Haneul and, although the sound was muffled and quiet, it was obvious the boy was upset over something. Sunggyu frowned and walked down the corridor towards the kitchen. The scene he found was rather...post-apocalyptic, like some bomb had attacked the kitchen. Woohyun stood in the center of that chaos, balancing a wailing toddler on his left arm and at the same time trying to mix his milk.  
  
“What exactly happened here?”  
  
Woohyun gave him a surprised look but then he seemed utterly relieved. “You’re awake! Thank god. Can you hold him for a moment?”  
  
Haneul was pushed into his arms and Sunggyu noticed the boy’s mouth was smeared with the same substance that covered the table, floor and countertops. The toddler pressed his dirty face into Sunggyu’s shoulder and the man winced slightly.  _There goes another one of my clean shirts._  “Why is he so upset? And what happened to the kitchen?”  
  
The younger man didn’t look at him, obviously still busy with the task of preparing Haneul’s bottle. “I wanted to try feeding him solid food. I prepared the mash as it said in the book but Haneul didn’t really want it although he was very hungry. He pushed the spoon out of my hands first and then finally the bowl...”  
  
Woohyun glanced at the dirty floor and Sunggyu followed his gaze, finding the abandoned bowl of fruit mash. “And now he’s mad because he hasn’t gotten his milk yet. It’s kind of hard to prepare it while holding him.”  
  
Sunggyu hummed and rubbed the toddler’s back in circles. “I guess it’s still too early for that. Don’t worry, Haneul-ah. You’ve got time.”  
  
The boy tried to push his fist into his mouth. “No, you can’t eat that, Haneul.”  
  
Not like the toddler cared for what adults said. It was certainly better than loud crying. Sunggyu walked around the kitchen with Haneul in his arms, trying to distract the boy and keep his mood up. When Woohyun announced the milk was ready, the older man let out a sigh of relief. The brown-haired man threw Sunggyu a reluctant look. “Do you want to feed him?”  
  
Sunggyu thought about leaving the trouble to Woohyun – because feeding an upset toddler was a big struggle – but then again, Woohyun had had Haneul the whole day. He wanted to be there for the baby too. “I’ll do it. What took you so long by the way?”  
  
“I’ve mixed some of the mash into it. The book said it might be a good way to introduce the new taste to the baby.”  
  
The older man grimaced shortly. Hopefully Haneul would at least like this bottle of milk. Maybe he just wasn’t ready to trade the bottle tip for a spoon. Sunggyu took the bottle from Woohyun and carried Haneul over to the living room. It was much more comfortable to feed the toddler on the couch than on one of the hard kitchen chairs. Besides, Woohyun had some cleaning to do there. Sunggyu grabbed a pillow to rest his arm on, since holding Haneul’s head was quite the straining task after a while. A toddler might look small but their weight seemed to increase with every minute you supported or held them. Sunggyu carefully brought the bottle tip to Haneul’s mouth and the baby’s wails turned into weak protests. Haneul took a sip and then made a face that Sunggyu could only translate to disgust.  _Shit. He’s not going to drink it._  
  
“Haneul-ah~ it’s yummy apple and banana!  _Mmmmmh_ ” Sunggyu tried to encourage him. He moved the bottle a bit to remind the toddler there was still something in his mouth.  
  
He was close to giving up and telling Woohyun to prepare a normal bottle of milk, but then Haneul sucked on the nub again and then another time until he had a steady rhythm. Sunggyu smiled. “That’s a good boy! You were just surprised at the start, right? It’s good, isn’t it?”  
  
Haneul’s hands curled around Sunggyu’s fingers as he drank. The little touch warmed the older man’s heart. He had never thought about having children of his own, but seeing Haneul like this, Sunggyu thought he was a tiny miracle. Something worth protecting with everything he had. His family was gone but Haneul was still here and he deserved Sunggyu’s full attention. He couldn’t be hung up on the past forever. Sunggyu needed to move on for the baby’s sake. The present was more important than the past, even if it was hard to accept a reality without his family.  
  
In the end, he had to almost force half of the bottle into the toddler’s mouth. Haneul kept falling asleep and therefore stopped sucking, but most of the time it was enough to move the bottle tip in his mouth to get the baby to drink again. Haneul didn’t manage to eat it all but it was enough for Sunggyu. He put the bottle away and picked the toddler up, patting his back until Haneul burped twice. Then he carried the tired boy back to the nursery and busied himself with the task of changing Haneul’s diaper and clothes. Haneul usually didn’t like that part a lot, but he was too tired to complain. Sunggyu placed the toddler in his crib when he was finished. Quietly, he turned the light off and sneaked out of the room.  
  
A delicious smell filled his nostrils as he neared the kitchen. Sunggyu’s stomach growled in response. “Ah, hyung, you’re back. I’m already done with cooking dinner. I hope you’re okay with rice and fish.”  
  
He glanced at the two bowls on the table, obviously still untouched. “Did you wait for me? You could’ve started eating already.”  
  
“I thought it would be nice to eat together. We can talk and...I don’t know, maybe begin anew.”  
  
Sunggyu raised an eyebrow but sat down at the table. He grabbed one of the bowls and a pair of chopsticks. “You mean we should punch each other’s faces again?”  
  
It was a joke, really, although admittedly a bad one. To his surprise, Woohyun actually laughed at it. “That’s not what I meant. We don’t really know each other beyond what Seungah told us about the other person. We can’t really trust each other if we know nothing about the other person. And maybe that can stop any further...misunderstandings.”  
  
Sunggyu put a piece of fish into his mouth and then cleared his throat.  _Oh my god, what did he put on the fish? Why does it taste so good?!_  He tried not to let it show how badly he wanted to shovel the rest of the fish into his mouth. He was hungry and it tasted amazing. “Well, it doesn’t sound like a bad idea. We should promise each other something first, though. No lies or secrets.”  
  
Woohyun smiled. “Fine with me.  _So_ , I’m Nam Woohyun, 25 years old. I... _uuh..._ I went to the same college as Seungah, obviously, and as I’ve said before I’m a surgeon. Though my current profession would be babysitter I guess.”  
  
 _Does that mean he was only one year under me in school? I can’t remember seeing someone like him. He looks like he’d been one of those popular kids you cannot overlook though. Like the captain of the soccer team that girls faint for._ Somehow the situation was a little silly but Sunggyu found himself playing along. “Kim Sunggyu, 26. I’m an architect as you already know.”  
  
The younger man held out a hand to him over the table. Sunggyu stared at it for a moment before he shook it. “I still don’t like you.”  
  
Woohyun shrugged. “Well, I think I like you. At least when you’re not punching me or shouting absurd accusations. I wish we could’ve met under different circumstances.”  
  
 _He likes me? Does he mean like like ‘you’re okay, dude’ or- no, Kim Sunggyu, don’t go there! He’s gay, you’re gay, but there’s nothing between you two. There can never be! Forget how handsome he is and concentrate!_  Sunggyu coughed. “Flirting won’t help you now.”  
  
“I’m not flirting.” Woohyun laughed. “Guys with small eyes are not my type.”  
  
 _Crack._  That was the sound of Sunggyu’s chopsticks breaking between his fingers. The younger man stopped laughing and paled. He took a deep breath. “I’ll eat in my room after all.”  
  
Sunggyu grabbed his bowl and a spoon from the drawer before he disappeared with quick steps. His ears burned from embarrassment and anger. He didn’t know what was worse: Woohyun picking at his only weakness or the part of him that had foolishly thought a man like that would flirt with him? Sunggyu put the bowl down on the table and grabbed his hair. “Stupid! Stupid! Damn Nam Woohyun!”  
  
 _How humiliating! He must think I’m so stupid!_  Sunggyu grabbed his notebook in a fit of anger and started drawing Woohyun’s face on an empty page. He added horns to Woohyun’s head and wrote DEVIL under it in bold letters. An arrow saying ‘enemy’ was also drawn. Sunggyu huffed to let out his anger. If he hated one thing, it was people commenting on his eyes. They weren’t  _that_  small! He could see very well! Sunggyu had gotten mocked for his eyes a lot in school and it had left a sore mark on his soul. Seungah had had beautiful eyes...  
  
Sunggyu glared at the page. In a fit of anger, he wrote ‘And you have a small dick!’ but then he quickly crossed it out again. He closed the notebook with a huff and quickly shoved food into his mouth. Maybe it was impossible for them to get along? They had barely made it past the introduction sentences. Okay, Woohyun hadn’t really said anything offensive. Usually Sunggyu didn’t mind comments about his eyes anymore, but perhaps a part of him had hoped to look attractive in the other man’s eyes. Of course there was no way something could happen between them, but if it weren’t for Seungah’s past relationship with that guy, Woohyun would’ve really been his type. Sunggyu sighed and put another spoonful of rice into his mouth.  
  
There was a knock on the door. He swallowed the food in his mouth. “What do you want?”  
  
Woohyun slowly opened the door and peeked inside. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you. I- Sometimes I say stuff without thinking. Seungah always scolded me for it.”  
  
“It’s okay. I probably overreacted.” Sunggyu muttered. He felt like any other reply would make a dent in his pride.  
  
They stared at each other awkwardly for a moment. Woohyun cleared his throat. “What are you going to do after dinner? Maybe we can watch a movie together? I still feel bad.”  
  
“I...don’t really feel like watching TV, sorry.” He poked the rest of his rice with his spoon. Sunggyu could practically  _feel_  Woohyun’s disappointment. Why was the other trying so hard to improve their relationship? Sure, it was better to live together when you got along with the other person, but still...  
  
He heard the door squeak as Woohyun closed it. “Wait!”  
  
The younger man looked at him through the slim gap. “It’s nothing personal. I just wanted to start packing Seungah’s things. I should get ready to move back to Seoul. Being here...it just feels like I’ll never be able to let go.”  
  
“Can I...help you?” Woohyun asked tentatively.  
  
Sunggyu thought about it for a moment. His eyes went to the notebook for a second.  _He’s the devil. Say no. No!_ “Sure...why not. Four hands are quicker than two. But don’t think about touching her underwear. I’m packing her clothes.”  
  
 _Damn you, Kim Sunggyu! Why can’t you say no?_ Woohyun just grinned in reply.

 


	11. Eleventh Bump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> slight warning for strong language

Woohyun came back to Seungah’s room a while later. They stared at each other in silence. Sunggyu had calmed down, but the mood between them was still a bit sour and awkward. Sunggyu wasn’t necessarily mad anymore at the other man’s comment about his eyes. He knew his reaction had been a childish one. He was an adult man. He could suck it up when someone insulted his eyes. “So-“, both of them started at the same time. Sunggyu clicked his tongue in frustration. “Stop looking so guilty. You just stated a fact. Besides, it’s not like it matters what _type_ you like. But just to make this clear: Short guys aren’t my type either.”  
  
The younger man stifled a laugh but failed horribly. Sunggyu cleared his throat. “Anyway, I snapped at you for something silly. I’m still exhausted I guess. Can we just move on from this? Even better: let’s forget about the whole thing.”  
  
Woohyun shrugged. “That’s okay with me. So, we’re packing Seungah’s stuff?”  
  
Sunggyu grimaced shortly and nodded. He grabbed one of the folded boxes. “We need to set these things up first. Two boxes should do for starters. I’ll take care of her wardrobe, so how about you...” He looked around and then pointed at a shelf. “Pack her books.”  
  
“Okay, hyung!”  
  
“Don’t call me that!” _We’re not that close!_  
  
“Should I speak informal then?” Woohyun asked with a mischievous look in his eyes.  
  
Sunggyu puffed his cheeks. “No! Fine, call me that.” _Brat!_  
  
He set up one of the boxes with ease while Woohyun seemed to need a while to figure out the system, which filled Sunggyu with some type of satisfaction. He didn’t offer any help, naturally, but Woohyun didn’t ask for it anyways. Sunggyu started packing Seungah’s clothes into his box. Some pieces of clothing filled his mind with memories from when Seungah had worn them. A few times, tears stung in his eyes but Sunggyu didn’t let more than a few silent tears escape. He was glad that he had his back turned towards Woohyun. It felt hard at first to put those clothes – memories of his sister – away, but after his first box was full, Sunggyu felt a bit liberated. Like he could breathe more easily inside the room. Seungah was gone and she would never come back. He’d have to accept that truth to move on.  
  
Sunggyu went to get another box and spotted Woohyun looking through a book instead of continuing his work. It looked like one of those thick books your professors would force you to read for a test - only to not ask a thing about the stuff written in it during the actual test. “What are you doing?”  
  
Woohyun flinched slightly and looked up. Sunggyu noticed his cheeks seemed wet and the other man hastily wiped them with his sleeve. “Sorry, I got caught up in memories. Sometimes I studied for tests at her place and Seungah had this habit of drawing stuff into my books. Here, see?”  
  
The brown-haired man turned the book in his hands and showed Sunggyu the pages. In between thick blocks of black letters and medical pictures, there were little sketches made by different kinds of pens. Seungah was really bad at drawing, so some of them looked rather...weird. “Is that supposed to be an alien?”  
  
Woohyun chuckled. “No, I think she said it was a cat.”  
  
“Well, at least it wasn’t supposed to be human.” Sunggyu couldn’t help but smile. He took the book from Woohyun’s hands and skipped through the pages to look for more. Some pictures had little messages next to them _“Fighting, Hyun-ah!”_ or _“Hooray, Dr. Nam! You did it!”._ It was kind of adorable. Sunggyu suddenly thought of a question. “How did you two meet by the way? You said you went to the same college but Seungah graduated three years earlier than you, so you were most likely not in the same semester. I don’t remember her taking medicine lessons either. Was your first time meeting in that club?”  
  
“Ah...no, it wasn’t.” Woohyun’s gaze turned distant and the fond look in his eyes made Sunggyu’s chest tighten. That wasn’t the look of someone who had used Seungah and not cared for her. It was the look of somebody remembering a person important to them. “It’s kind of a long story.”  
  
Sunggyu shrugged and looked through the room. “Plenty of stuff to pack.”  
  
Woohyun seemed to hesitate. The older man sighed. “Please? I...I need to know.”  
  
He knew that remembering that moment was most likely painful for Woohyun. Sunggyu knew how much his chest ached whenever he remembered a moment with Seungah. It just felt like Woohyun knew of a Seungah that he had never gotten to know; someone who defied their parents and sought freedom in her own personal way. In order to let go of his sister, he’d have to face the truth first. It only felt right to do so and who knew – maybe it would make it easier to believe Woohyun’s side of the story.  
  
“Well...I actually got to know her through my older brother.”  
  
Sunggyu blinked. “You have an older brother? You never said so! Can’t you stay with him then?”  
  
The younger man shook his head. “He’s living near Busan with his wife and their kids. Pride of the family; he’s got his own company which does very well. My parents always wanted me to be like him – graduate with the best grades, get a well-paid and respected job, a wife and a family; in that exact order. He’s a good older brother and I guess if I asked him for help or some money, he’d definitely not turn me away. But I don’t want to bother him... He has his own family to care for and...well, my parents were pretty clear that they didn’t want me to contact him anymore.”  
  
He grimaced shortly. Woohyun’s parents sure sounded like dicks. Sunggyu’s parents had been quite strict as well and never supportive of his sexual orientation, but at least they never kicked him out of their home and told him to never contact them or his sister again. The topic of Woohyun’s parents seemed to bring the mood down again. The younger man probably missed talking to his family. Sunggyu hastily tried directing them back to the original topic. “So how did your older brother and my sister know each other? Don’t tell me they had sex as well because-“  
  
Woohyun’s amused chuckle interrupted him. “No. They had a lot of college courses together. The world is a small place, isn’t it?”  
  
Sunggyu huffed. “No, this town is just too small.”  
  
The other man shrugged. “Anyways, Seungah had problems when it came to math and Boohyun, my brother, asked me to tutor her, because he knew I was good at it and often tutored other students. It was really weird at first to teach someone older than me, but Seungah’s personality made it easy. She was friendly and funny, not once looking down at me for being younger or a nerd at math.” Woohyun smiled shortly. “We got closer with time and became really good friends. Even when the tutoring lessons stopped, we still met up and did things together. It always felt like I could talk to her about anything. She was a great listener and good at giving advice. I felt like she could trust me in the same way I trusted her. We had no secrets from each other.”  
  
Sunggyu felt a strange feeling in his chest. Was it jealousy because Woohyun had been so close with his sister and known her secrets? After high school, he had left for Seoul to study without really looking back. Sure, Sunggyu had always kept in contact with Seungah, but there was a limit to how much you could know about someone’s life via text messages or phone calls. His older sister had had her own life here and Sunggyu wondered if he even knew 10% of it. Looking back, whenever she _did_ talk about stuff like her boyfriend or college, Sunggyu knew he had never fully listened to it. He didn’t care to listen.  
“Are you okay?”  
  
He snapped from his thoughts with a slight jerk. “Y-Yeah. I guess I never thought about much about what my sister is doing outside of college. Who her friends are and stuff like that. I never asked, maybe that’s why she never talked much about it. All this time...maybe I was too self-centered to care.”  
  
“I’m sure it’s not like that. You clearly loved your sister deeply-“  
  
“I did but...” He sighed. “Honestly, inside I always thought there couldn’t possibly be anything interesting happening in her life. Small, boring town and all. I feel so ugly when I remember how annoyed I sometimes felt when we talked over the phone for a longer time. Like I was wasting my time talking to her. Now I wish I could go back in time and tell myself to treasure every moment; to always listen to her, even when it seems like she’s talking about mundane things. If I had done so from the start, I wouldn’t need to feel jealous of you now for knowing her better than I do.”  
  
Sunggyu had no idea why he came out to Woohyun like that. He had loved his sister dearly but a part of him had always thought of his own life as “more important”. Now he knew differently but it was too late. Did he have any right to feel jealous know? _Now you’re gone and_ _I can never tell you how sorry I am for my ugly thoughts, Seungah. Would you have forgiven me?_ He balled his fists. It hurt to face the truth, but at the same time he felt like the burden on his shoulders was getting lighter. He was facing the ground, so Sunggyu didn’t notice Woohyun until the other man’s arms wrapped themselves around him. At first, he wanted to break the hug and give the younger man an annoyed glare, but instead Sunggyu stayed still and let himself get hugged. The comforting gesture seemed...nice. Now that he was getting a hug, Sunggyu felt like he had really needed one.  
  
“I believe all of us have ugly thoughts like that from time to time. But if you had _really_ felt that way, Seungah would’ve known. She knew you were annoyed sometimes, but she understood that and never blamed you for it. I think she knew that it didn’t mean you don’t care or hate her. One time she joked that _‘finding talking to your family annoying’_ was part of being a rebellious child.” Woohyun told him jokingly.  
  
Sunggyu sighed. He had to admit Woohyun’s words made him feel a little better. He had thought of him as some stranger, but he had obviously been close with Seungah. When he looked up to reply, he noticed how close their faces were. Their lips were so close that it probably looked like they were about to kiss. His heart skipped a beat when their eyes met and Sunggyu fought back the warmth creeping into his cheeks. He lifted his hands and gently pushed against Woohyun’s chest to break the embrace. Sunggyu stepped away and cleared his throat, looking anywhere but the younger man.  
  
“W-Who told you it was okay to hug? I told you we’re not friends! Don’t cross the line!” He grabbed an empty box and put it between them to symbolize the line. Woohyun’s lips twitched in amusement at the childish action.  
  
“You just looked like you needed a good hug, hyung!”  
  
“No, I didn’t!” Sunggyu retorted quickly. He gathered himself. “Let’s just agree to forget what happened.”  
  
Woohyun puffed his cheeks shortly. “Hyung, are you allergic to feelings perhaps?”  
  
He gaped at the brown-haired man. Woohyun laughed. “It just feels like you’re never honest about your feelings.”  
  
Sunggyu closed his mouth and crossed his arms. “Are you my shrink now? I don’t need to talk about my feelings with you. You’re just a...” He waved his hands around in search for the right word. “ _Babysitter_.”  
  
“Seeing how we’re going to raise a kid together, I think we should get along. Talking about our feelings should be the basic step. It might help us understand each other better and develop a sense of trust.” Woohyun smiled. “By the way, since you called me a babysitter, does that mean I have the job?”  
  
Sunggyu threw his arms in the air. “You’re insufferable! No more talking about feelings now. It’s getting late, so let’s end the packing here today and go to bed.”  
  
He practically threw the other man out of his room after he said those words and closed the door. Sunggyu knew Woohyun wasn’t just talking idealistic bullshit. Talking about his feelings had helped him feel better and the more he talked with Woohyun, the more he understood the younger man wasn’t a bad person. Seungah and Woohyun had both made mistakes. There wasn’t just _one_ person at fault, no evil one to blame. They had been young and foolish, and somehow it seemed fate had been against them from the start. Sunggyu was scared of his feelings towards the other man changing though. It had been easier hating the other man, throwing punches or insults at him even. Noticing Woohyun was a good guy just made Sunggyu feel like a jerk for being so unfriendly to him before. Not to mention that he was attractive and Sunggyu was starting to forget the 100 reasons he wasn’t allowed to think about Woohyun like that. Finding your dead sister’s ex-boyfriend and father of her son hot? Big no. Your heart skipping a beat when you’re close? Giant no. Wanting to kiss him? Don’t even start.  
  
Whenever he did remember his growing attraction, Sunggyu did the only thing he could do: push that man far away from him, make nasty comments or shout. He was behaving like a child. Wasn’t he the only one making things difficult right now? Sunggyu groaned but resisted the urge to slam his head against the door. He glanced at his watch and noticed just how late it had gotten. It was surprising how fast time passed when you were distracted. Sunggyu kicked the empty box to the side and cleaned up the room a bit to calm his thoughts. Afterwards, he changed his clothes and threw his tired body on the bed. Sunggyu rolled onto his back and folded his hands with a sigh.  
  
“Maybe keeping Woohyun around is a bad idea after all.”  
  
He closed his eyes but then the piercing cry of a toddler made him flinch. Sunggyu was about to sit up when he heard quick steps from the corridor. “I’ll get him”, Woohyun called and the older man relaxed again. The stubborn side of him told him to go after Woohyun and check if he was doing his job correctly or to see if he wasn’t going to run away with Haneul. Sunggyu hated to admit it, but he knew Woohyun wouldn’t do anything like harming his child or running away. And it was certainly nice not to have to run every time Haneul cried. Sharing the burden seemed only fair too. Sunggyu closed his eyes once more and tried to fall asleep. _Forming a sense of trust_ , Woohyun had said and strangely enough he found himself trusting the other man. Slowly but surely.  
  
  
  
  
  
When Sunggyu woke up the next day, the apartment was strangely quiet. He could smell something delicious in the air, though, hinting at Woohyun already being awake. Sunggyu rolled over and opened his eyes, groaning when the sunlight blinded him. He sat up and threw the blanket aside. Sunggyu got out of bed with another yawn and shuffled towards the door. He went to the bathroom to clean his face and tame his hair, before checking on the nursery. He found Haneul asleep in his cradle, happily sucking on his pacifier. Sunggyu quietly closed the door again and headed towards the living room next. Woohyun wasn’t there and he couldn’t see him standing in the kitchen either. “Where did he go?”  
  
On the kitchen table, Sunggyu found the source of the nice smell. Woohyun had prepared breakfast for him. By the way the rice was still steaming, the food hadn’t been cooked too long ago. He turned away from the kitchen again and suddenly noticed a figure lying on the couch. Woohyun was obviously asleep, blanket discarded on the floor. Sunggyu stepped closer and saw the dark circles under his eyes. He wondered how much the younger man had slept last night. He couldn’t remember hearing Haneul’s cries at night but Sunggyu doubted the toddler had slept through the night. The older man grabbed the blanket and threw it over the sleeping figure again. Woohyun probably deserved some rest.  
  
Sunggyu went back to the kitchen and ate his breakfast. Afterwards, he cleaned the dirty dishes and the rest of the kitchen. It seemed like Woohyun had already fed Haneul his breakfast, so he didn’t bother with waking the younger man to ask him. Besides, there was no way Haneul would still be sleeping if he hadn’t eaten anything yet. When everything seemed in order again, Sunggyu got his laptop to get some work done. After sleeping for almost 9 hours without any interruption, his head didn’t ache as much anymore and Sunggyu found it easier to work on his project. It seemed he had really needed that break after all.  
  
In the end, he only had an hour to himself before Haneul woke up, obviously eager to start his day and explore the world once more. Sunggyu didn’t mind it this time. He had made quite a lot of progress with his design. It was enough for now. He smiled and closed his laptop, walking over to the nursery to greet his nephew. “Where’s my cute little Haneul? There he is!”  
  
He reached into the cradle to tickle the boy and Haneul smiled back at him happily. The toddler eagerly raised his hands and started babbling, probably demanding to be picked up. Sunggyu opened the sleeping bag and grabbed the boy under his arms, lifting him out of the cradle. The sleeping bag fell back in the cradle and he kissed Haneul’s forehead gently. “Good morning, Haneul-ah. Did you have a nice nap after breakfast?”  
  
The toddler clung to him as Sunggyu brought him over to the changing table. Sunggyu gasped in pain when the little fingers pinched the skin on his neck. “Ouch! God, why are babies so ridiculously strong!”  
  
Changing Haneul’s clothes and diapers was a routine by now and Sunggyu was done pretty quickly. “Who’s a good-smelling, happy baby now?”  
  
His nephew made a cheerful sound and then proceeded to try and eat his foot. Sunggyu watched him in amusement. “Does your foot taste good?”  
  
He grabbed the tiny foot and opened his mouth. “I’m going to eat it now!”  
  
The toddler laughed happily as Sunggyu acted like he was going to eat his foot. At some point the baby screeched in joy because he got too excited. Sunggyu grimaced at the pain in his ears. “Geez! Calm down before the windows break.”  
  
A moment later, Woohyun burst into the room, his hair all over the place. “Is everything alright?”  
  
Sunggyu picked up the toddler and nodded. “Yeah. We were playing around and he just get a little overexcited, sorry.”  
  
Woohyun visibly relaxed. “Oh. Okay.”  
  
“Thanks for the breakfast by the way. How much trouble did he give you last night? You looked exhausted.”  
  
The younger man shrugged. He got closer and cooed at Haneul, who – to Sunggyu’s relief – didn’t reach out his arms to change the person carrying him. He felt somewhat happy to see the toddler still clinging to him. It made him feel like he was Haneul’s favorite person and that was admittedly a nice feeling. Woohyun didn’t give up on greeting his son though. He stroked over Haneul’s small head. “Good morning, Haneul-ah.”  
  
The boy babbled something incomprehensible in reply. Woohyun looked at Sunggyu again. “He was awake twice but it was okay. I managed.”  
  
Sunggyu lifted an eyebrow in doubt. The younger man sighed. “Okay, the second time he woke up, I was close to despair and waking you up. He kept crying and screaming for an hour and I’m honestly amazed you managed to sleep through that.”  
  
“I guess I was pretty exhausted last night.” Sunggyu glanced at the toddler who was starting to get bored and impatient. “Thank you for letting me sleep and...good job.”  
  
He walked past Woohyun just as the other man smiled widely. Sunggyu ignored the happy puppy and headed to the living room to put Haneul down into his playpen. The toddler seemed upset about being put down but Sunggyu quickly pressed a button on one of his toys and the melody immediately distracted Haneul. He looked at Woohyun when he entered the room. The younger man was still smiling. “Hyung, do you think I can use your laptop again for a moment? Maybe the bank has replied to my email by now.”  
  
Sunggyu pursed his lips shortly but nodded. “I’ll get my laptop.”  
  
He set it up on the table in the living room and opened the browser for Woohyun to use. “Just don’t touch anything besides the browser. I don’t want you accidentally deleting important files.”  
  
Woohyun gasped. “How did you know that was exactly what I was going to do?”  
  
Sunggyu gave him a glare and the younger man chuckled. “I’ll behave. Thanks, hyung.”  
  
He had allowed Woohyun to call him hyung yesterday but somehow it still felt weird. Not the bad kind of weird, of course. Sunggyu knew he shouldn’t have allowed it though. The space between them had only gotten smaller thanks to that. He had to keep their ‘relationship’ on a professional level. Boss and employee, like that. After a while, he heard Woohyun shout behind him. “Finally!”  
  
Sunggyu gave him a confused look. Woohyun grinned widely. “The American bank finally replied. They told me everything is settled with my bank here and I should be able to access my money now.”  
  
“That’s great! Took them long enough.”  
  
“Do you think it’s okay if I leave and go to the bank? I want to try and see if I can withdraw money or not.”  
  
He shrugged. “I’ll be okay. I’ve looked after Haneul on my own before, you know. Just go and settle that problem with your bank.”  
  
Woohyun seemed to hesitate for another moment but then he nodded and stood up. He put on his clothes and then waved at Haneul. “I’ll be back soon, Haneul-ah. Wait for Daddy!”  
  
The younger man was gone before Sunggyu could even think about what to say to that. He wanted to shout at Woohyun not to call himself Haneul’s father but, honestly, that was exactly who Woohyun was. The bitterness in Sunggyu wasn’t gone completely yet, but he knew it was only right for Woohyun to address himself as the father (or daddy in that case). _He seems genuine, so who am I to deny him? He’s telling the truth, right Seungah? You wouldn’t be friends with an asshole – probably._


	12. Twelfth Bump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> we're moving forward, literally.

Hours passed with Sunggyu playing around with the toddler or working on his project when he was finally asleep. By the time Haneul woke up hungry, he had prepared lunch for him. It was just milk again since he wasn’t quite ready for another attempt at different food. The boy drank it eagerly this time, not making a fuss at all. Sunggyu put him in his cradle afterwards for another nap. Woohyun still wasn’t back by the time he managed to make Haneul sleep once more, so Sunggyu went back to packing boxes by himself. He sorted Seungah’s stuff into things he could sell (of course the money would go into Haneul’s bank account), things to give away to people in need (normally, Sunggyu wouldn’t care about something like that but it seemed like something Seungah would do) and lastly, things he’d keep in memory of his sister. Getting over her didn’t mean he had to delete her existence from his life. Sunggyu wanted to have pictures or items to remember her by; things to show Haneul when he grew up. Maybe Woohyun also wanted to keep something…  
  
“Where is that idiot anyways?” Sunggyu muttered, suddenly feeling annoyed by the other man’s absence.  
  
The bank was quite a walk from Seungah’s apartment but it surely didn’t take that long? _Maybe the bank still has problems and refuses to give him access to his money?_ Sunggyu ruffled his hair. _Why am I worrying over him? I should be glad he’s gone._ But Sunggyu wasn’t. At the start, he had been worried about Woohyun lying and his anger over Seungah’s loss and her “boyfriend” leaving her with the kid hadn’t helped the situation. Sunggyu had tried hating the man, but there seemed to be nothing bad about him. He _could_ hate the Woohyun who punched him but both of them had been hurt and angry at that time, so it would be unfair to blame it all on the younger man.  
  
“He couldn’t have possibly gotten lost, right?” Sunggyu grabbed his phone and moved to call the other man, but then he realized they had never exchanged numbers.  
  
Suddenly, he stopped in his tracks and stared at the window. What if Woohyun was late because he wasn’t coming at all? He finally had access to his money, so maybe the younger man had taken the chance to run away. Maybe Sunggyu and Haneul had just been a convenient roof over his head. He didn’t want to believe this was the reason, but neither could Sunggyu totally cross out the possibility. Woohyun had been desperate before but now he was less dependent on the older man. There was also a chance that Woohyun hadn’t just run away but was planning to use his money to get Haneul back through other ways.  
  
The more time he had to think, the more possibilities Sunggyu’s mind seem to find. He had started to believe in Woohyun but now the doubts were growing again in his mind. Sunggyu flinched when a cry pierced the silence of the apartment. He waited to see if Haneul might calm down again by himself but it was clear that wasn’t the case. He sneaked into the nursery and noticed the toddler had managed to throw all of his pacifiers out of his crib. Sunggyu gave him a long look.  
  
“You know, you wouldn’t have to be upset about not having a pacifier to suck on if you’d just stop throwing your entire supply out of the crib. I left four with you! Four!” The baby just gave him angry, demanding cries in reply. Sunggyu sighed and picked the dirty ones up.  
  
He got two clean ones and put one in Haneul’s mouth. The cries stopped and the toddler looked at him with watery but content eyes. Sunggyu left the other one at the side of the crib and stroked his nephew’s head slowly. “There, there. Now go back to sleep.”  
  
Sunggyu was just straightening up again when the baby spit out his pacifier and cried out once more. His heart ached at the sight of the wailing toddler. It was obvious this was more than just being a stubborn baby to annoy the people in charge. Sunggyu had to learn the hard way that babies were clever creatures who could fake crying. The tough thing was deciding when it was real and when it was just a test. This wasn’t a test - that much was sure.  
  
He lifted up the little body with his right hand and stabilized the head with the other one. Sunggyu let Haneul rest against his upper body and rubbed the baby’s back gently. “Did you have a nightmare? You’re usually a good sleeper during the day.”  
  
For a while, he tried the cuddling approach but then Sunggyu had to try other stuff. He changed the diaper but it didn’t help and then he decided to abort the sleeping mission and let Haneul play instead, but the toddler went from crying to screaming the second Sunggyu tried to put him down in his playpen. “Come on. You need to stop crying! You’re going to dry out.”  
  
 _Not like he’s going to listen to you._ Sunggyu was about to despair when he heard the lock of the front door clicking. He hurried over to check and spotted Woohyun entering the apartment. The younger man gave them a surprised look and froze in the doorframe. Haneul moved in Sunggyu’s arms and it was obvious to him what it was the toddler wanted. He grudgingly admitted defeat and pushed his nephew into Woohyun’s arms. The other man quickly dropped everything he had been carrying. Haneul nuzzled against the brown-haired man with contentment. Woohyun did the same Sunggyu had done but this time it worked. It somehow annoyed the older man but he just puffed his cheeks and closed the door.  
  
Woohyun gave him a short smile before carrying Haneul in the direction of the nursery. Sunggyu looked at the stuff the other man had dropped in a hurry. There was a suitcase, a shoulder bag and some other plastic bags from different places. Had Woohyun gone shopping while Sunggyu was here worrying over everything? He pursed his lips. Sunggyu looked at the suitcase again and remembered Woohyun saying something about having kept his belongings in a locker at the station. If he had his belongings now, that meant the younger man had access to his money. He put the things aside and decided to check on Haneul’s status instead.  
  
The toddler was back in his crib and Woohyun was crouching next to it, one hand disappearing into the crib. Sunggyu quietly stepped closer and saw that Haneul was holding on to Woohyun’s thumb with his clenched fingers. The baby’s eyes kept closing and then opening again for a split second, as if to check Woohyun was still there. Sunggyu pursed his lips. “He must’ve been afraid you wouldn’t return.”  
  
Woohyun gave him a short glance before looking back at his son. “I’m sorry I took so long, Haneul. I won’t ever leave you, okay?”  
  
Haneul’s heavy eyelids fell again and this time the toddler seemed to have fallen asleep. Woohyun knew better than to tear his finger away immediately though. Everyone had a light sleep when they first drifted off, babies included. A sudden movement or sound now and Haneul would be awake again. Sunggyu decided it was better to leave the room instead of standing there in silence. He went back to the living room and sat down on the couch, leaning back as he waited for Woohyun to come out. In the meantime, he’d try to sort out his thoughts. He felt like shouting at Woohyun for being late but the thought of another argument with him gave Sunggyu a headache. Not to mention that could wake Haneul up again. Woohyun had returned, that was most important, but how reliable was he really? Could Sunggyu really trust him to look after Haneul while he was working? It was obvious Woohyun loved the boy, his son, but the younger seemed unreliable at times. Going outside for grocery shopping without money, staying away for longer than necessary without informing them and what was it with Woohyun’s terrible luck? Just remembering the story of what happened in the US made Sunggyu shudder.  
  
“Hey.”  
  
Sunggyu jumped and immediately felt embarrassed that Woohyun had caught him by surprise like that. He glanced over his shoulder. “Took you long enough.”  
  
“Well, Haneul- oh, that’s not what you meant, is it?” The brown-haired man grimaced shortly. “Settling things at the bank took quite some time and then I wanted to grab my things from the locker. I need fresh clothes to wear and all my other valuable stuff was in the suitcase as well. I really didn’t plan on staying away for so long.”  
  
Woohyun sat down next to him on the couch and sighed in exhaustion. Sunggyu unconsciously crossed his arms. “And the other bags?”  
  
“Obviously, I couldn’t put everything in one suitcase when I left the US. Most of my stuff is still on the way, so I went and bought some basic supplies I’ll need. I don’t want to keep stealing your toothpaste for example.” The younger man chuckled at the joke but Sunggyu narrowed his eyes at him. What else had Woohyun used that wasn’t his? “Listen, do you remember all that talk about trust we had? I know we’re pretty much strangers still but you treat me like a criminal on risk of flight. I’m not going to run or double-cross you, so please at least trust me on that, okay?”  
  
Woohyun gave him _that look_ ; the one that made Sunggyu feel like he was looking at a puppy and unable to be mad. He didn’t even like puppies! The older man pursed his lips shortly. Now he felt bad for doubting Woohyun still. The brown-haired man had a point. Sunggyu didn’t have to trust him blindly, but it seemed only fair to give Woohyun a little more trust than before. “Fine. I’m sorry for thinking you ran away with your money.”  
  
The other man huffed. “Thanks for confirming. So you really thought that.”  
  
He seemed a little disappointed. Sunggyu internally slapped himself for his words. “I- It’s not like that was my first thought, you know. I didn’t doubt you during the first hours…”  
  
That made Woohyun smile again. “That’s a start! Next time, don’t doubt me at all, hyung!”  
  
“Next time-- you-“ Sunggyu bit down on his lip. “Give me your phone number. You’ve got a working phone now, haven’t you? At least I’ll be able to contact you next time you’re out.”  
  
They exchanged numbers quickly and Sunggyu spent a few minutes pondering over what he should name Woohyun’s contact. In the last second, he decided on _‘annoying puppy’_. Woohyun stood up. “I’m going to prepare our lunch or did you eat already?”  
  
Sunggyu shook his head and then watched as the other man disappeared into the kitchen. He leaned back and turned the TV on. He could get used to someone else cooking for him. Deep down, Sunggyu had always hoped to find a boyfriend who could cook well. He liked to eat but he was a mediocre cook. He sighed and shook his head inwardly. No, he had to keep in mind this was just a temporary agreement. They were just living together to take care of Haneul, no romantic feelings whatsoever involved. It wouldn’t be right.  
  
 _Damn noona, why didn’t you fake-date some overweight dude with hair on his teeth who can’t cook and only cares about himself?_  
  
  
  
  
  
Two days later, Sunggyu found himself in his car again on the way back to Seoul. Luckily, they managed to find a baby seat that fit into the backseat of his car, so Haneul could drive in the car with them. Woohyun was sitting next to the toddler, in charge of keeping the baby distracted or sleeping during the drive. He wasn’t very successful, sadly. Sunggyu remembered Seungah saying that Haneul liked driving in a car but his nephew hadn’t stopped crying since they had put him into the seat. They had only been driving for about twenty minutes but Sunggyu was close to driving back into town. The cries and screams were distracting him from driving and giving him quite the headache as well. Not to mention that it wasn’t good for Haneul to keep doing this. Sunggyu glanced into the rearview mirror. Woohyun was leaning over to Haneul’s side, rubbing the baby’s stomach and his head.  
  
“Ssh, Haneul. Please, you have to calm down.” The brown-haired man begged yet again without success. Sunggyu could see how much it was paining Woohyun to see his son in such a state of despair.  
  
The older man saw a sign for a gas station and decided to leave the busy street for now. They needed to give little Haneul a break. Sunggyu didn’t know much about babies and how good their memory was, but he had a feeling that Haneul remembered his mother’s accident. How much had his nephew experienced of it and how much did he comprehend of what happened? Sunggyu knew Haneul disliked the sound of ambulances and apparently car drives were just as bad. Last time, he transported Haneul with his car, the toddler had been asleep during the drive from the hospital to the apartment, so Sunggyu didn’t have an idea it would be _this_ bad.  
  
Once he had parked the car, Woohyun unbuckled his seatbelt and then Haneul’s. Sunggyu used the time to get around the car and open the door. He picked up the wailing toddler after Woohyun had pulled a hat over the small head. He needed protection from the sun and wind after all. Sunggyu carried Haneul over to where the trees protected them from the sun. The small boy calmed down as Sunggyu cooed and comforted him. “It’s okay, Haneul. Nothing is going to happen.”  
  
He sat down on a nearby rock just as he heard the car doors slam again. Woohyun walked over to them, Haneul’s bag in his hand. The younger man stopped when he was next to them and started rummaging around the bag. “He should drink something. Good thing we prepared some milk. I’ll try and ask the guy at the gas station if he can heat it up for us.”  
  
Sunggyu nodded shortly. Woohyun took the cooler with the milk and sprinted over to the gas station. Haneul turned his head slightly to follow the other man with his eyes. Sunggyu smiled shortly and moved his nephew into a sitting position. Haneul couldn’t keep the position for long without someone to support him, but Sunggyu knew he’d have the hang of it soon. “Oh Haneul, this will be a long drive back to Seoul.”  
  
A few minutes later, Haneul was in Woohyun’s arms and happily feeding from his bottle, the car drama long forgotten. The younger man had offered to feed the toddler to give Sunggyu a break. He was the one who had to drive them all the way back to Seoul after all. Sunggyu used the free time to drink and eat. If they couldn’t get Haneul to sleep, the drive was going to take a while. If they stopped every 20 minutes, it would take twice as long to reach their destination.  
  
Luckily, Haneul drank his entire bottle and a full baby was a tired baby. After the boy did two strong burps, Woohyun rocked him in his arms while humming a lullaby. Sunggyu looked at them again and once again wished Seungah would be here to see this instead of him. Woohyun seemed like he’d be a good father. If Seungah had had the choice, she probably would’ve chosen Woohyun instead of Sunggyu in her will. But she died thinking Woohyun wanted nothing to do with his son. He had thought the same but now here they were.  
  
When they were sure Haneul was fast asleep, they headed back to the car. Woohyun carefully put the toddler back in his baby seat and fastened all the straps again. They did their best to close the car doors quietly when they got in as well. Sunggyu started the car carefully and their journey continued, just without the constant crying and screaming this time.  
  
Woohyun sighed contently and leaned back into his seat. “Much better.”  
  
The rest of the drive was spent in mostly silence. The only sound came from the radio that Sunggyu kept playing at a low volume. The music wasn’t important; he just wanted to hear the traffic reports. Sunggyu wasn’t the type to talk while he was driving, especially since he was used to driving by himself, and he wanted to keep his concentration fully on the road as well. His sister’s case had shown how quickly a car drive could end in death. One moment of distraction and you wouldn’t live to regret it. Woohyun didn’t seem to mind the silence either, probably because he had fallen asleep about 10 minutes after they had left the gas station. Occasionally, Sunggyu caught him waking up with a sudden jerk but Woohyun always closed his eyes again afterwards. (He absolutely did not glance at the rearview mirror more than necessary to look at Woohyun’s sleeping face.)  
  
  
  
  
  
It felt strange to return to his apartment. It felt like years ago that he last stepped into it. Today, they’d spend a night there. A truck would arrive at the new apartment tomorrow, bringing all the boxes and baby furniture that couldn’t possibly fit into Sunggyu’s car. They had only found an apartment that quickly thanks to Minho’s help. His friend had been looking around for apartments for days without consulting with Sunggyu first, which had let to a few discussions and changes, but they’d managed to agree on a suitable place in time. Woohyun would have his own room there and should Sunggyu ever decide to throw him out, he could use it as a guest room still. The nursery would take a while to look exactly the same as the old one, but Sunggyu was determined to make it happen.  
  
Woohyun let out a short whistle and looked up the tall building. “Looks expensive. Please don’t tell me you live on the highest floor.”  
  
Sunggyu huffed. “Don’t worry, there’s an elevator.”  
  
“The highest floor? Seriously?”  
  
“Are you afraid of heights or something?” The older man retorted.  
  
“No, I’m not.” Woohyun replied as he grabbed their bags from the trunk. “It just…I don’t know, seeing such tall buildings and imagining being on the highest floor… I keep thinking ‘What if there’s a fire? You won’t be able to get down in time!’ or what if an earthquake happens?”  
  
Sunggyu stared at him in silence. “I wonder how you made it all the way to America on a plane with your imagination.”  
  
Woohyun flushed and grabbed the bags, walking ahead into the building without waiting for Sunggyu. The older man chuckled to himself. He opened the car door and unbuckled Haneul. His nephew gave him a sleepy look of confusion as Sunggyu lifted him out of the car. He pulled the changing bag out as well and then locked the car. “Welcome to Seoul, Haneul.”  
  
Holding Haneul with one arm, Sunggyu carried the bag into the building and caught up to Woohyun in front of the elevators. The brown-haired man seemed a little pale. They got into the elevator when the doors opened and the younger man moved to press the button for the highest floor. Sunggyu stopped him and pressed the button for the 4th floor instead. Woohyun gave him a confused look and the older man grinned mischievously. “I never said I live on the highest floor. Do you know what an apartment that high up costs? It’s insane.”  
  
“You-“ Woohyun glanced at Haneul and swallowed the word on his tongue.  
  
“I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that?” Sunggyu gave him a challenging look. When Woohyun didn’t reply anything, he laughed in triumph. Haneul had no idea what was going on but still smiled along with his uncle, adding to Woohyun’s humiliation.  
  
The younger man looked away in embarrassment. “ _You’re lucky you’re cute._ ”  
  
“Huh-“ Just then the door opened with a _bing_ and Woohyun hurried out of the elevator with their bags. Sunggyu blinked and looked at his nephew. “Did he say something? I didn’t catch it. He’s not mad, is he?”  
  
Haneul didn’t reply but gestured for Sunggyu to move his ass and follow the other man. “Yes, yes, Your Impatient Highness.”  
  
He took the lead in the corridor and brought Woohyun to the right door. Sunggyu unlocked it and scrunched up his nose at the smell that hit him. When the call from the hospital had reached him, Sunggyu hadn’t wasted any time with cleaning up his apartment before he left. He had just grabbed some clothes in a hurry and then rushed out again.  
  
Woohyun looked around, eyeing the dirty socks and other clothes on the floor. “ _Wow_ , what a mess.”  
  
Now it was Sunggyu’s turn to be embarrassed. “I didn’t have time to clean up! Stop looking around!”  
  
But the younger man took his words as an invitation to explore the rest of the messy apartment. “Oh my god, I think your kitchen is alive. Are you sure it’s safe to spend a night here with Haneul? These things look like they could come and eat us in our beds”, Woohyun shouted from the kitchen.  
  
Haneul made a sound of amusement and Sunggyu gave him a flustered look. “I’m sure it’s not that bad! It’s not like I buy a lot of groceries, so what could have possibly happened?”  
  
Sunggyu used his feet to gather the dirty clothes and then kicked them in the direction of the bathroom. He looked around for a safe place to put down Haneul but everything screamed dirty or dangerous corners. Not that it mattered to the baby. Haneul was awake now and very eager to explore the new place. Sunggyu glanced in the direction of the kitchen. “Woohyun! Either you take Haneul from my hands or you make use of your stupid muscles to carry his crib and playpen up here!”  
  
The brown-haired man reappeared with a bow. “Of course, princess. Your knight shall carry the heavy stuff for you. May I have the key to your carriage?”  
  
“Only if you stop talking like that.” Sunggyu glared at him. “Call me princess one more time and you can babysit yourself in a hotel room.”  
  
Woohyun bowed deeply and grabbed the keys from his hands. Sunggyu huffed when he was gone. “So annoying…”  
  
Haneul started moving on his arm and Sunggyu sighed at his impatience. He put the bag down and let Haneul down on the floor as well. He pulled the hat off Haneul’s head. “Don’t complain about the dust though, or try to put it in your mouth.”  
  
The baby started crawling around slowly while Sunggyu kept his eyes on him. He walked over to the bathroom while keeping his eyes on the toddler. It seemed unnecessary though, since Haneul immediately changed course and quickly crawled over to him. It was amazing how fast he could be when he wanted. Of course the baby was eager to explore the new area his uncle headed into. Sunggyu opened the door to the bathroom and picked up his dirty clothes. He threw them into the laundry bin, all the while keeping an eye on Haneul. The toddler crawled all the way to where he was standing and then stopped, looking directly at the laundry bin. Sunggyu saw the cogs turn in his head. The baby lifted his upper body and hit his palms against the big object.  
  
“ _DA!_ ” Excitement shone in his eyes.  
  
Sunggyu chuckled. “That’s the laundry bin, Haneul. Nothing interesting about it.”  
  
His nephew seemed to think otherwise. When Sunggyu made no move to pick him up, the toddler tried to balance himself on his knees and lifted his hands in an obvious gesture. He quickly grabbed Haneul before he could fall over and hit his head on the hard tiles. Haneul wasn’t content with just being up though. He kept twisting around in Sunggyu’s hold, whimpering and complaining because he couldn’t get closer to the laundry bin, which meant getting _into_ the bin in Haneul’s world.  
  
“Haneul, stop it. You can’t go in there. Haneul, _no_!”  
  
The firm ‘no’ sent Haneul over the edge. The baby grasped at its last straw - his most powerful weapon when he couldn’t get his way - he cried out loud. When Sunggyu shook his head and carried him even further away, he turned up the volume of his wailing. “A No is a No.”  
  
Needless to say, Haneul didn’t take no’s well. Sunggyu regretted his decision to let the toddler follow him. He even wished he could change places with Woohyun now. Just then, said man walked into the apartment with his arms full. He glanced at them with a frown. “What happened?”  
  
Sunggyu rolled his eyes shortly. He grabbed a clean pacifier from the changing bag and gave it to Haneul. The toddler accepted his peace offering quietly. Haneul gave him a look as if to say _‘don’t think that means I’ve forgotten about this’_. “I put my clothes in the laundry bin and someone wanted to follow them. I didn’t let him into the bin and, well, you heard the result. He must have inherited that stubbornness from you.”  
  
“Are you sure? Because, as I see it, stubbornness is a strong trait in your family.” Woohyun replied nonchalantly.  
  
The older man huffed. “Hurry up and set up Haneul’s crib and playpen!”  
  
“That’s what I’m talking about.” Woohyun muttered as he walked past him.  
  
In a matter of minutes, the playpen was ready for use and Sunggyu was glad to give his arms a rest. Haneul wasn’t too happy about being put into his little prison cell but he didn’t throw a fit. Sunggyu turned on his piano toy and the boy happily smacked his hands onto the soft keys. With his hands finally free, Sunggyu went into the kitchen to take a look at the mess. There was an undefinable mass on his kitchen counter. He was afraid of doing a closer inspection – and what was it going to do? – so Sunggyu just grabbed three plastic bags for garbage. He used two as improvised gloves because he didn’t dare to touch the _thing_. Sunggyu held his breath when he touched it and made a face of disgust. Even with the protection of plastic around his hands, the sensation was making his stomach turn. A flamethrower would’ve been good in that moment. He didn’t have one though, so Sunggyu just put the rotten thing into a bag, added his two gloves and then sealed the bag with five knots. Only then did he dare to breathe again.  
  
Sunggyu opened a window for some fresh air and then grabbed a wet cloth to clean the counter. The smell was still in the air but he hoped it would pass soon. Remembering about the food they brought over from Seungah’s apartment, Sunggyu quickly checked his fridge for any signs of unwanted life. Some things were way past their date of expiry but luckily those items were sealed and easier to dispose of.  He cleared his fridge and then put the things inside they had brought along from Seungah’s old apartment. Sunggyu looked around and sighed when he remembered they’d have to pack his stuff in the next weeks as well. He’d have to give the key to the apartment back to the owner of the building in a month, which left them with some time to pack, thankfully.  
  
“Hyung!”  
  
He jumped slightly and walked back into the living room. “What is it, Woo-“  
  
Sunggyu stopped in his tracks as a smaller mass collided with him. Arms hugged him tight. “Minho?!”  
  
The younger man pulled back and grinned at him. “I’m so glad you’re finally back!”  
  
From the corner of his eyes, he saw Woohyun stepping into the living room as well. “Who’s that? How did he get inside?”  
  
Minho let go of Sunggyu completely and glanced at the other man. “I got inside because hyung gave me a key. I should be asking who you are!”  
  
Both of them looked at him like they wanted Sunggyu to throw one of them out. Haneul spit out his pacifier. “Ba!”


	13. Thirteenth Bump

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> minho and woohyun fight for the honor of bedding sunggyu-
> 
> wait, wrong summary.
> 
> minho and woohyun meet. chaos happens.

For a moment, Sunggyu was too stunned to move or speak. In the end, he decided to ignore Woohyun’s question and turned towards his friend. “Minho, I told you not to come over uninvited!”  
  
The younger man pouted shortly and held up a bag. “It’s not totally uninvited. You told me you’d be here around 5 pm! I thought you’d be hungry after the long drive and I know how lazy you get, so I brought food for you. It’s your favorite, _Bibimi-hyung_!”  
  
Sunggyu twitched at the little jab and the hateful nickname, but the thought of eating bibimbap eased his anger. He took the bag from Minho. Damn that boy for knowing him so well. “I told you not to call me that anymore!”  
  
Minho laughed shortly. “Don’t be embarrassed, Gyu-hyung!”  
  
He huffed. “I’m not! I’m angry!”  
  
His friend elbowed him. “ _Eh_ ~ I know you can’t be mad for long. You’ve even accepted the food already!”  
  
Someone cleared his throat and Sunggyu remembered the presence of the other man. He looked at Woohyun who had his arms crossed. “Sorry to interrupt you two lovebirds but I’m not air, okay?”  
  
He snorted. “Woohyun, this is Choi Minho, my _friend_ and _colleague_ , as I’ve told you before. Minho, this is Nam Woohyun.”  
  
Minho gasped in surprise. “THE Nam Woohyun? Your biggest nightmare? The ass who left your sister on her own to deal with her pregnancy? The guy you want to murder? Should I have brought a shovel-“  
  
Sunggyu smacked the back of his head and the younger man winced. “ _Ouch!_ But you said he’s the worst piece of trash-”  
  
“Shut up, you idiot!” He hissed and glanced at Woohyun. The brown-haired man’s expression had darkened significantly. “Don’t look at me like that! I didn’t know you when I said those things. Minho, we should have a talk.”  
  
The older man dragged Minho into the kitchen and closed the door behind them. His friend gave him an impatient look. “What is Nam Woohyun doing here? You didn’t even tell me he appeared in front of you and now he’s in your apartment with you, asking me what I’m doing here! I thought you despised him! He ditched your pregnant sister!”  
  
Sunggyu sighed and leaned against the counter. “I forgot to mention it, I guess.”  
  
“How could you forget that, hyung!” Minho exclaimed. “Did he threaten you? Does he want to take Haneul’s custody from you?!”  
  
“Calm down, geez!” He grabbed the younger man’s arms and pushed him onto a chair. Then Sunggyu started to tell the story of how he met Woohyun and how they came to a truce of sorts. Minho listened attentively and waited until he was finished with his story.  
  
“Now I know why you were looking for such a big apartment…” The smaller man looked up at him, his big, brown eyes full of worry. “Are you sure his story is believable? There’s no way someone can have that much bad luck! Plus, he’s still kind of a jerk for never finding time to contact her again! And he punched you…”  
  
“I actually hit him first…” Sunggyu muttered. He licked his dry lips shortly. “I don’t know if everything is true, but I was at the bank with him and he really couldn’t access his money. I haven’t fully forgiven him, but the way he talks about Seungah… That’s not something you can fake, Minho. He obviously liked her at some point and he genuinely cares for Haneul. I don’t know what Seungah would’ve wanted me to do. Would she have forgiven him completely? I don’t know, maybe, most likely yes.”  
  
“And now? You’re just going to live with him? Share Haneul’s custody?”  
  
Sunggyu pursed his lips shortly and then shrugged. “I still have full custody of Haneul. Woohyun says he’s content just helping out and acting like a babysitter.”  
  
“Yeah, but for how long? I mean, he’s Haneul’s father, eventually he’ll want to be called Dad and have his son to himself. Hyung, maybe he’s just waiting for a chance to take Haneul away from you.”  
  
“I know.” He ruffled his hair. “I know that but I need someone to look after Haneul when I’m working, at least until he’s old enough to go to Kindergarten. Woohyun offered himself up for the job and he’s pretty good at taking care of Haneul, who - by the way - also seems to like him a lot, which I guess should be expected.”  
  
“And you?”  
  
Sunggyu blinked and tilted his head to the side. “What about me?”  
  
“Do you also like him?” Minho asked upfront.  
  
The question was so ridiculous Sunggyu had to laugh. “No! I mean, I don’t hate him, but it’s not like you’re hinting at. Why would you even think that?”  
  
His friend gave him a long look. “Because I know your type and he fits right into your pattern! Smaller than you, cute face and a fit body!”  
  
He gasped. It’s true that he found Woohyun attractive but still- “Don’t make me seem so superficial! I look at the inside too and Woohyun is just…no. He’s Seungah’s ex!”  
  
Minho sighed. “Sorry, hyung. I know you’re not superficial. I’m just worried you’ll be his next victim.”  
  
“You think he’ll get me pregnant and then disappear?”  
  
Sunggyu succeeded in making his friend laugh again. It wasn’t the best thing to joke about, but at least Minho didn’t look so down anymore. “ _Aish_ , hyung, I’m trying to be serious! If you needed somebody to help you with Haneul, you know I would volunteer anytime! Why didn’t you just ask me? I don’t feel comfortable with the idea of _that guy_ living with you.”  
  
He smiled and gave his friend a short hug. “I knew you’d do that and that is exactly why I didn’t ask you. You’d drop your job the minute I ask and take care of Haneul instead. I know you would but…Minho, this is not a cat or a dog. Woohyun knows a lot about babies, at least as far as I’ve seen these days. Nothing personal, but what do you know about babies, Minho?”  
  
His friend pursed his lips and then huffed. “I can learn, Gyu-hyung!”  
  
“No, Minho.” The older man shook his head firmly. “I appreciate your help, I really do, but you can’t help me on this. You have a job and your own life, don’t throw that away.”  
  
“And that Woohyun doesn’t?”  
  
“I feel less bad about his life.” He said jokingly and Minho laughed again.  
  
“Is there no way I can get you to kick him out and let me babysit Haneul instead?” His friend looked at him pleadingly, his eyes as big as they could get. _Why is everyone so good at the puppy look?_  
  
He ruffled Minho’s hair. “No. Well, maybe if you can prove Woohyun’s whole story is fake or reveal his true face or something. Minho, trust me. I’ve had the same worries as you do and I’m still not 100% sure Woohyun is to be trusted, but let’s give him a chance, okay?”  
  
“Fine…” Minho stood up suddenly and they were so close their bodies almost touched. The younger man cupped his cheeks without warning. “But if he ever tries to make a move on you, you can’t let him!”  
  
Sunggyu felt himself blushing under Minho’s serious gaze. He quickly tried to hide his embarrassment – or was it attraction? – and joked again. “Yes, _mom_.”  
  
“Have I just been mom-zoned?” Minho gasped in offense. He pressed his palms harder against Sunggyu’s cheeks and grinned. “How are your cheeks always this squishy?”  
  
He uttered an insult but, because of Minho’s hands, it came out muffled.  
  
Just when Sunggyu lifted his hands to pull down the younger man’s arms, the door to the kitchen suddenly opened and Woohyun stood in the doorframe, expression turning into a frown. Sunggyu cleared his throat and finally pushed Minho’s annoying hands away. His cheeks felt warm but he blamed it all on Minho’s hot palms. “Can’t you knock?”  
  
Woohyun’s frown turned a little darker. “I’m here to prepare Haneul’s meal. I thought you would’ve heard Haneul’s cries for food by now but I guess you were _distracted_.”  
  
Now that Woohyun mentioned it, Sunggyu became aware of the distant cries from the toddler. He really hadn’t noticed them before and Woohyun successfully made him feel guilty. “Sorry, let me help you.”  
  
“You can go and look after him while I prepare his meal – if you’re not too busy that is.” The younger man retorted and then turned away from them.  
  
Minho opened his mouth to say something but Sunggyu dragged him out of the kitchen. He let go of the other man then and went over to where Haneul was. Behind him his friend muttered to himself. “What an asshole.”  
  
The little boy’s wails lessened slightly when he saw Sunggyu and the older man picked the hungry toddler up. “Woohyun isn’t always like that. He’s right anyways. I should’ve been paying attention to Haneul. I’m not living by myself anymore and just because Woohyun is there doesn’t mean I can ignore Haneul’s needs.”  
  
Haneul’s fingers curled around his shirt and the baby rested his body against Sunggyu’s upper body, head on his shoulder. “ _Ssh_ , Haneul, food will be ready in a minute. You must be really hungry after the exhausting drive.”  
  
He turned to Minho again who was smiling widely at him now. Sunggyu raised an eyebrow. “Why are you looking at me like that?”  
  
His friend shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess I’m surprised to see how good you’re with kids. You always said that you hated them with passion.”  
  
“I still hate kids but Haneul’s the exception. He’s cute, so I forgive him everything.” Sunggyu cooed at his nephew. The little toddler seemed to get he was being talked about positively and made a noise of joy. His face was buried in Sunggyu’s shoulder still but the older man was sure the baby was smiling. It was funny how babies learned this kind of stuff naturally by watching other people. They noticed people’s lips turned upwards when good or funny things happened, so babies just did the same.  
  
Minho chuckled shortly. He approached them and looked over Sunggyu’s shoulder to surprise Haneul. The toddler moved to Sunggyu’s other shoulder immediately. When Minho tried again, Haneul did the same and turned away once more. “I think he doesn’t like me.”  
  
“He just needs some time to warm up to strangers, I think. Besides, you have no food in your hands, otherwise Haneul would be all over you already.” Sunggyu said jokingly.  
  
His friend shrugged but gave up for now. “Seriously though, you look great- with a kid I mean! Are you sure he’s not your kid? Your squishy cheeks are totally the same~”  
  
“He’s not! All kids have squishy cheeks! I mean- I _don’t_ have squishy cheeks!”  
  
“Yes, you do.” Minho and Woohyun said at the same time.  
  
Sunggyu shot both of them a glare. He tore the bottle from Woohyun’s hand and sat down on the couch to feed Haneul. Two against one was just unfair. At least cute, little Haneul was always on his side. Well, almost always. It was quiet for a while until Minho spoke up first. “So, Woohyun- _ssi_ , I heard you’ll be just a _babysitter_ instead of claiming your place as Haneul’s father. Is there a reason you don’t want custody of your own child?”  
  
He glanced over his shoulder to keep an eye on both men. Sunggyu felt kind of worried Minho would start a fight. His friend wasn’t a very aggressive person but he was very protective. Woohyun shot the other man a cold look. “I don’t think my reasons are any of your business, but working as a babysitter doesn’t mean I’m not Haneul’s father.”  
  
“I see. And you won’t miss working as a surgeon?”  
  
Woohyun balled his fists and the older man thought he might swing a punch, but Woohyun’s expression was anything but angry. He seemed…sad. “I know you won’t believe me no matter what I say, but I—I’ve already missed 5 months, no, more than a year of Haneul’s life. I couldn’t celebrate the pregnancy with Seungah or be there for the first ultrasound scan. I didn’t get to be there for his birth, hear his first breath or see his eyes open for the first time. I’ve missed so much and this is my chance to catch up. I love my work but it can wait. Haneul can’t.”  
  
Sunggyu turned his gaze away and looked at Haneul again. He smiled down at the baby. Woohyun really did love his son. The older man knew of the reasons Woohyun rejected taking custody of him. Woohyun still blamed himself for not being there for Seungah and Haneul; a feeling Sunggyu knew all too well, although his guilt couldn’t possibly compare. He knew someday Woohyun might chance his opinion when the wounds were healed and his confidence up again. Sunggyu wasn’t sure what he was going to do then. Eventually, Woohyun _was_ going to move out again, for one reason or another, and maybe he’d want to take Haneul with him.  
  
“I’m sorry…you know…for being so suspicious of you.” Minho muttered finally. Apparently, no one could be angry when faced with Woohyun’s sad face. Sunggyu felt a bit of his pride restored.  
  
“It’s okay. I understand that my appearance surprised you. Compared to my first meeting with Sunggyu-hyung, and our first days together, you were actually pretty nice to me.” Woohyun said jokingly but the older man shot him a dark look. Why did he feel like these two were going to team up against him someday soon?  
  
“Hyung? You’re already on a friendly basis like that?” Minho frowned.  
  
Woohyun shrugged. “I think it’s my turn to ask you something – why do you have a key to this apartment?”  
  
Sunggyu momentarily let go off Haneul’s bottle and caught Minho’s gaze. He moved his flat hand to his throat and gave Minho the clear message: _‘Don’t tell him or I’m going to cut off your head’_. Minho gave him a mischievous look in return and the older man groaned. Haneul whined on his lap and Sunggyu had to pick up the bottle again to feed the baby. “Well~ Sunggyu and I used to date for a while. I still have my key from back then and sometimes I come over to _take care_ of him.”  
  
Minho wiggled his eyebrows at Sunggyu and the older man mouthed _‘You’re dead’_ to him. “Take care of him, huh…”, Woohyun deadpanned.  
  
“He just brings food over sometimes or cleans!” Sunggyu quickly intercepted the conversation. Minho gave him a grin. “You, go home now! And leave the key here; the owner needs both of them back.”  
  
His friend seemed to understand Sunggyu was going to throw him out of a window if he said another word about their past relationship. Minho put the key on the table. “I’m not going to get a key for the new apartment, am I?”  
  
“No”, Sunggyu and Woohyun said in unison. They exchanged a glance and Minho puffed his cheeks.  
  
His gaze softened. “You can still come over, Minho. Just don’t drop by announced. Things are going to be different with…Haneul here, but that doesn’t mean you’re not welcome anymore. Thank you for buying the bibimbap for me.”  
  
The smile returned to Minho’s face. He came over to the couch and awkwardly hugged Sunggyu’s upper body, trying hard not to disturb Haneul’s meal. “Call me if you need me, okay? I’ll come over immediately!”  
  
“I know and I will. Sorry for throwing you out like that.”  
  
Minho shook his head. “I understand. I just came over to see for myself how you’re doing and make sure you eat. Mission accomplished.”  
  
His friend gave him a sudden peck on the cheek before pulling away. “See you soon, Bibimi-hyung~”  
  
Sunggyu lashed out with his leg to kick the younger but Minho quickly fled the scene. “ _Aish_ , this brat!”  
  
The toddler in his arms burped loudly. Sunggyu glanced down at him and noticed the bottle was empty. Haneul’s eyes twinkled in amusement and the baby smiled. “Someone seems like a happy baby with a full stomach.”  
  
“Let me put him to bed, _Bibimi-hyung_.” Woohyun’s voice was awfully close and the older man jumped in surprise. Haneul was taken from his loose fingers. The brown-haired man gave him a teasing smirk.  
  
 _Damn you, Minho!_ He narrowed his eyes at the other man. “Don’t you dare call me that again! It’s not like we signed a contract for your new job, so I can throw you out any time!”  
  
Woohyun’s eyes suddenly lit up. He lifted Haneul up and the toddler let out another burp. “That’s it! A contract! We’ll put down our terms and that way we’ll both feel a little safer. I want to work as a babysitter but I don’t want to be at your constant mercy. You also don’t want to be afraid of me backstabbing you and taking Haneul away, so what can help us better than a contract? We’ll sign a mutual agreement of sorts.”  
  
Sunggyu pursed his lips. He quite liked having this much power over the other man, but the contract didn’t necessarily seem like a bad idea. “I’ll think about it.”  
  
“No, _we_ will think about it. We definitely need to set up some rules. By the way, where is Haneul supposed to sleep? I set up the crib but I don’t know where to push it. It’s way too bright here in the living room. We could push it in your bedroom but I don’t think you’ll be able to sneak in later and sleep there.”  
  
“Why not? Haneul is a deep sleeper. By the time I go to bed, he won’t notice a thing. You can sleep on the couch here.”  
  
Woohyun shrugged. “Something tells me it won’t be as easy as that, but you’re the boss.”  
  
Sunggyu rolled his eyes and stood up, grabbing the crib to push it down the short corridor towards his bedroom. The only other rooms were the kitchen and the bathroom, both not really good places for a baby to sleep in. He made Woohyun wait in the corridor as he quickly made his bedroom presentable. Sunggyu was a lazy person and he had stuff lying around everywhere, especially dirty clothes. In the last second, he also spotted the bottle of lube on the bedside table, quickly tossing it into the top drawer just as Woohyun brought Haneul inside. He let out a breath of relief.  
  
There wasn’t that much space between the walls, his bed and the wardrobe, but they created more free space by pushing Sunggyu’s bed to the side. Actually, Woohyun was the one pushing the bed after Sunggyu failed to move it one inch. He wasn’t a sports type of person, okay? A big bed weighed quite a lot! After what seemed like the most stressful 20 minutes of his life, Haneul was finally in his crib, dozing off peacefully. The curtains blocked out most of the light and the two men struggled to get out without running into things.  
  
They decided to eat dinner next and while Sunggyu ate the bibimbap Minho bought, Woohyun warmed up some of the food they had brought along. “So, that was the _just a colleague_ guy from the call last time, huh?”  
  
Sunggyu almost choked on the food in his mouth. He finished chewing and swallowed properly. “He _is_ a good friend. It doesn’t matter to you what we were in the past.”  
  
He hoped Woohyun was going to let the topic go, but it seemed like the younger man wasn’t done yet. “But you two seem awfully close still. In the kitchen it looked like you were about to kiss, flushed cheeks and faces almost touching and all. He also gave me all these glares like an overprotective, jealous boyfriend.”  
  
The warmth crept up his neck and Sunggyu turned his gaze towards the television to distract himself. “He was glaring at you because you’re the guy that got my sister pregnant and then left. Minho and I are just friends and that’s the last I’m going to say about this, because it really isn’t any of your business.”  
  
He put new food into his mouth to end the discussion. Minho was a naturally cuddly guy who liked skinship and was overprotective in general. There really wasn’t any deeper meaning to anything Woohyun had seen. Sunggyu knew that but the brown-haired man didn’t know Minho that well yet. Why did Woohyun even care? Wasn’t he the one behaving like a jealous boyfriend? Sunggyu choked on a piece of carrot. He coughed violently and put down the bowl, tears filling his eyes. A strong hand hit his back repeatedly and Sunggyu spat out the offensive vegetable. A glass of water was pushed into his field of vision and he accepted it. The older man drank slowly, careful not to start another coughing fit.  
  
“Are you feeling better?” He became aware of the warm hand still rubbing circles on his upper back. Sunggyu quickly shrugged it off before he could start thinking how nice it felt.  
  
“I’m fine. This carrot just thought it would be a cool time to go down the wrong pipe.”  
  
“Hyung, do you know how to kill a salad?” Woohyun asked with a smile, giving him an expectant look.  
  
Sunggyu kept his face straight. “I’m sure you’re going to tell me.”  
  
 “You go for the _carrotid_ artery.” Woohyun laughed at his own joke.  
  
The older man needed a second to understand the wordplay but then he couldn’t stop his lips from turning upwards. “Only a surgeon would make a stupid joke like that.”  
  
“You call it stupid but you smiled!”  
  
“I smiled because it’s so stupid.” Sunggyu retorted, still smiling. Woohyun opened his mouth to speak but the older man stopped him. “If you’re thinking of telling another joke – stop.”  
  
“But it’s a really funny one, I swear! Why did the carrot-“  
  
Sunggyu stood up and put his almost empty bowl on the table. He grabbed paper and a pen from a cabinet, before sitting down once more. “You said we need rules – here is rule #1: _No more carrot jokes_.”  
  
He wrote it down and Woohyun snatched the paper away from him. “That’s a ridiculous rule! But if you want to be like that…”  
  
The younger man grabbed the pen as well and wrote down: _#2 No instant food._  
  
Sunggyu rolled his eyes. “I can eat whatever I want.”  
  
“Not while I’m living with you. That stuff isn’t very healthy and I’ll be there to prepare meals. I don’t care what you eat outside the apartment, though. It’s your body.” Woohyun gave him a look and Sunggyu unconsciously shifted in his spot. Why was the other man giving him a look like that? He wasn’t fat!  
  
“ _Ugh_ , fine, but if you ever feel too lazy to cook, don’t come whining to me.” The older man muttered. He took the pen from Woohyun and wrote down: _#3 The name Bibimi-hyung is to not be said out loud anymore. Offenders will be kicked out of the apartment. Forever_.  
  
Then Woohyun added rule number 4: _No bringing boyfriends, lovers or one-night stands home for the night. Kissing and touching forbidden as well._  
  
“What kind of rule is that?” Sunggyu asked, feeling offended for some reason.  
  
“Well, we will have a little child living with us. It’s probably better to protect Haneul from…unwanted traumas.”  
  
“ _Traumas_.” Sunggyu repeated dryly. He nodded after a moment. “But on a second thought…great idea. I don’t want you bringing any weird people home.”  
  
“ _Me_?” Woohyun pointed at himself and then laughed at the ridiculous accusation. “I’m not the one whose colleague has a key to come over and _take care_ of me. Come on! Seriously?”  
  
He _was_ going to kill Minho. “You had a key to Seungah’s apartment too! I mean- I told you it wasn’t like that. Either way, we agree on the rule. That being said we should make an additional one that concerns this aspect of our lives.”  
  
 _#5 No questions about previous or current relationships or lovers (exception: Seungah)_  
  
Woohyun shrugged and took the pen from him. Sunggyu grabbed his bowl again. This was going to be a long night – and a long list.


End file.
